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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Did you do a birth plan?

55 replies

ALR123 · 22/10/2015 20:58

Had my 28 week midwife appointment today, totally forgot to ask her about doing a birth plan and she didn't mention it. I have no idea what my options are and am a but confused and don't know if I even need a plan? If so when do they get done normally?
I'm not starting my nct antenatal course till I'm 35 weeks so I wasn't sure how things work. Thanks!

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Original poster

ALR123 · 22/10/2015 22:52

That's all really helpful thanks everyone.
What Is it about pethidine that you don't like? I don't even know what it is!
And what's delayed cord clamping?

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CharleyDavidson · 22/10/2015 22:54

This will out me but...
My sister specified one thing on her birth plan: That her dd was cleaned up immediately after birth and handed to her DH to hold first.

(She's rather squeamish and that extended to the thought of holding her own vernix/blood/whatever smeared child. I still remember that warm feeling today and DD1 is 14 years old).

CharleyDavidson · 22/10/2015 22:56

Pethidine made me vomit. Lots. It's a pain relief injection. It makes you sleepy and relieves pain and did work.

Delayed cord clamping lets the blood from the cord flow into your baby.

Runningupthathill82 · 22/10/2015 23:07

Pethidine makes everything go warm and fuzzy. It's like you're aware of the pain but you don't especially care about it. For me, it really helped with pain relief, but I didn't like the way it made me feel like the birth was happening to someone else, and I wasn't really there.
That said, I'd have it again if the scenario were the same.

Dixiechick17 · 23/10/2015 07:59

Oh sorry, should have mentioned that. Didn't want pethidine because my Mum didn't react well to Morphine following an op, it made her ill and so far in my life my Mum and I have reacted to the same things and have the same allergies, so I didn't want to risk it.

HippyChickMama · 23/10/2015 09:33

Pethidine isn't a very effective pain killer for most people. I was coerced into having it during first labour and it made me feel totally out of control, I hated it.

SparklyTinselTits · 23/10/2015 09:37

I did one....went completely down the shit pan though!
Won't be doing one next time.

Heavenscent86 · 23/10/2015 09:42

With the pethidine did anyone find that they didn't know how to push? I genuinely had no clue what I was doing. The midwife was telling me to push and I was just there saying I'm trying but I don't know what to do. I thought pushing was supposed to be instinctive?

Heavenscent86 · 23/10/2015 09:43

By the way my birth plan said NO epidural and that was pretty much all. My mum had an exceptionally bad experience with one a year earlier and I was put right off.

Runningupthathill82 · 23/10/2015 09:47

I could push fine with the pethidine - so I'm told! - but to be honest I think it had mainly worn off by then anyway. I was in labour for a loooooooooooong time.

It was a very effective painkiller for me. Although it doesn't kill the pain as such, it just feels warm and fuzzy and zoned-out ish. Haven't felt so out of it since various experiences in the healing fields at Glastonbury back in the day, mind.

SparklyTinselTits · 23/10/2015 10:04

I was given pethidine while in very early labour to make me sleep before the synto drip was started in the morning....best nights sleep I've ever had

Therewasanoldladywho · 23/10/2015 12:13

I researched everything and had a detailed plan, which included a home water birth with little to no intervention. Instead I had pre-eclampsia and delivered by emcs at 36 weeks

Research and know your options, this is important imo, but don't expect to get what you want!

RevsDeCub · 23/10/2015 12:23

My birth plan was a nice calm water birth, no painkillers apart from G&A and OH to cut the cord.
In reality, I had to be on my back monitored continuously due to high everything (blood pressure, temperature, pulse, white blood cells) baby had to have a clip on his head due to his heart rate, I had an epidural and he was delivered in a rush with an epiostiomy and kiwi as when he came out he wasn't breathing. The room was full of doctors and midwifes.

I won't be having a plan next time, but I don't begrudge making one as its what I wanted. Just be aware not everything goes to plan unfortunately, labour is unpredictable.

Awfulknitter · 23/10/2015 13:27

I want a birth plan that says "Teleport baby from uterus to arms." :)

Seriously, I reckon I need to research some things and decide what I'd prefer (vitamin K yes/no, what kind of pain relief, etc), and other things where it might be good to get a bit informed in advance (eg, difference between vetouse and forceps and when they might be needed). Everything else falls into the category of "It would be nice to..."

The online birth plan form for the NHS seems like it covers all the major points, and has helpful links to all kinds of extra reading. I'm also hoping that the NCT antenatal classes will help me tell what are sensible expectations.

DramaAlpaca · 23/10/2015 13:30

I did a very detailed, well researched birth plan for the first one, but didn't bother with the next two.

Jeffreythegiraffe · 23/10/2015 13:41

Not all hospitals give pethidine, by the way. Some do diamorphine, some don't give it at all. It made me vomit.

Delayed cord clamping is to let the blood flow from the placenta, it's meant to benefit the baby. Also think about skin to skin and vit K injection, and if baby had to go to special care would you want your dh to go or stay with you.

TheOriginalWinkly · 23/10/2015 13:47

I did, and I was glad I did. I had preferences for pretty much every eventuality. DH knew what I wanted and my midwife, in fairness, was excellent.

I think 'plan' is the wrong word as you can't plan a birth but it is a good idea to think about the various options in different circumstances.

SkyFoCrumbo · 23/10/2015 13:59

I think birth plans can be really good if they're simple, especially when you've given birth before and are stipulating 'bottom line' stuff like no pethidine or whatever.

My plan with my first DC was an epic two-page fantasy novella, though . It was all soft music, low lights, no intervention stuff...I think the only thing missing was a fairy orchestra playing whale music . My birth was a different kind of 'epic' ending in emergency section, wouldn't ya know!

I did have a more useful plan with my second, though, which was an elective section. I just said 'skin to skin as soon as possible' and that I wanted to breastfeed asap after we got into the recovery room, and the midwife and docs did read it and did comply with my wishes.

MrsGentlyBenevolent · 23/10/2015 18:42

I made a simple-ish one. Water birth, minimal intervention, only gas and air, let the cord stop pulsing before being cut, deliver placenta without injection, vitamin k injection for baby.

I was very lucky - all of the things I wanted, I got. It seems I'm in the minority though, but don't let that worry you. Don't over plan it, or over think it (I didn't go to ante-natal classes as didn't want to be overwhelmed by information). I was a few hours away from an induction if I hadn't gone into 'natural start labour', it could have been a very different experience. Make a plan, but with the understanding it's can change. What's important is getting baby here as safe as possible for both of you.

RozTheSchnoz · 23/10/2015 18:51

Had one for DS1; he was induced and I didn't even get the piece of paper out of my bag. Didn't even print it out again with DS2.

RozTheSchnoz · 23/10/2015 18:56

I had pethidine for DS1 and it made me feel drunk. Had it again with DS2 but it had worn off by the time it got to the 'crucial stage' and having a top up would have meant he was very drowsy at birth so I just ploughed on without.

MaryMarigold · 23/10/2015 18:59

Had a bells and whistles birth plan for DC1, whale music, meditation and the like. Actual birth was nothing like that at all.

With DC2, my birth plan was just no pethidine under any circumstances, epidural straightaway if I request one, and ask for my consent before you put baby on my chest for skin to skin. All worked fine.

Those are the kind of things you can only know once you've been through it once though.

MaryMarigold · 23/10/2015 19:04

With me, pethidine didn't dull the pain but just made me feel really drowsy, so I was falling asleep between contractions and not getting to the gas and air in time.

justgoandgetalife · 23/10/2015 19:13

Went like this:

DS1: plan- no pain relief; in a bath; want nice music - on the day: "forget all that & go with the flow, forgot the bath altogether", result - one healthy baby

DS2: plan - no plan; on the day - went with the flow, emergency in the end, so did exactly what midwife told me to; result - one healthy baby

DS3: plan - what plan? No time!; on the day - no time!; result - one healthy & very quick baby!

In summary - write one if you want but be prepared to rip it up on the day!

Good luck!

Original poster

ALR123 · 23/10/2015 19:59

Some of those posts really made me laugh! Thanks for the advice and I feel I definitely am not going to worry too much. My husbands been obsessed with making a play list... I'm starting to think it's a stupid idea now I'm going to do my research about what ideally I do and don't want (I think pethidine will be on my 'dont' list after what you've told me) but then on the day it'll probably all go out the window.
Someone I know who had a birth plan and expected it all to go swimmingly rang 999 when she went into labour as she panicked so much and forgot to take the plan with her! I'm going to try and not be that mental. I think my plan will say 'ideal world... gas and air, birthing pool, baby'.
I keep having dreams that I go into labour in my sleep and wake up with a baby in my bed! Hahahaha

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