PARNER DOSENT WANT NO MORE CHILDREN.. HELP

[Misszh]

so I've had this discussion today with my partner.. We have been together for some time now and have ultimately dropped the B Bomb on him...I want a baby!! There is 20 year age gap between us.. YES I like the older man...He has 3 children already.. When we first got together he knew I'd want kids of my own at somepoint and he said to me a few years and we will do it... Well them few years are up and Nope... He definitely don't want anymore.. What do I do..I love him to pieces.. Dose it make me selfish.. To leave him over it? Do I wait for him to change his mind? Advice please ladies xc

Sorry Misszh, I think he is unlikely to change his mind.

It certainly does not make you selfish if you leave him over this. It is a huge deal and he acknowledged that you would probably want children at some point, he simply chose not to raise it again and only let you know his true feelings when you brought it up again.

Of course he may have hoped you would not develop a strong desire to have children (some women don't), or he may only have made a firm decision when you told him you didn;t want to wait any longer.

At least you know now and can make an informed choice.

I've ended 2 relationships because they didn't want children :(

Sorry - didn't you start a thread about this elsewhere? For what it's worth, you're 22. At 22 I was with the person I thought I'd spend the rest of my life with. 15 years later, I'm no longer with that person, have moved 10,000 miles away from my home country and have been happily married for 5 years with 4 year old DTDs However, if I'd told my 22 year old self that at the time, I don;t think I would have listened... :S

You have 2 choices, the way I see it!
Either you stay with this guy and try to give up on the idea of children, which seems a bit harsh for a 22 yr old. It also may make you feel bitter if you are still with him years later and deeply regret not having kids.
The other option is to leave and meet a nice man at some point who does want kids, or more kids! I can see why you might want to be with an older guy at 22 but the chances are, quite a few men of your partners age may feel they are done with babies and little kids, if they already have them!
That isn't to say they all are. My partner is 44 and I'm 36 and we are having my first, his second child!
I don't think your partner was fair to hint that he might want kids one day and then change his mind, however, he has a right to do that if he wishes, just as you have the right to leave because he has! You are not selfish!