Feeling worried about small age gap

[Idoitforthelove]

First of all, I know I sound like an ungrateful cow and I realise that some couples would kill to be in my position. I'm mum to a beautiful one year old and have just found out that I'm expecting my second.
My daughter was a planned pregnancy and I have never been happier than when I found out i was pregnant the first time. I've loved every moment I've spent with her this year.
This baby wasn't planned and I already feel like a bad mother, because I'm just not excited. All I can think of is that I don't know how I'm going to cope with two babies under the age of two (my husband's away a lot) and I'm terrified that I won't love this baby as much as I love my daughter. How can I ever love ANYONE as much as I love her?
I know that babies are a blessing and I LOVE being a mum so I know I should be happy and feeling grateful, but It just makes me feel worse when I think about how I should be feeling. This poor little baby being born to a mum who feels like this about them.
I also feel really sad, because I don't want anything to change. I feel as though we've made another baby and it's going to change my little girl's world. I'm already struggling with sickness and feeling tired - I'm already not as good a mum to her as I was a week ago, and that's just going to get worse.
Can anyone reassure me that a 21 month gap is manageable and that ive not ruined everything.
I just feel so sad and the sadder I feel, the more worried I feel about the fact that I'm feeling sad and not happy!

Hi OP.
I am currently expecting my third, due in November and my youngest was 1 last week, so I'm having a 14 month gap. The shock was overwhelming with how I would cope, especially as I have a 6 year gap between my eldest and 1 year old x

19 month gap here and i shared your anxieties completely. But as soon as my dd was born I loved her. I'm still amazed now at how lovely they both are in their different ways. And it is wonderful to see them play together and enjoy similar things because they're a similar age.
As a pp said the house was a mess for the first year or 3 but it was worth it.

My first 2 were 14 months apart. It's a struggle when they're little, but easier when they get older. You will be able to cope, you just do. You'll love this DC as much as you love your DD, there's always enough to go round. You won't be able to give your DD as much time, but sharing you isn't a bad lesson to learn.

You're all brilliant and have made me feel so much better. Thank you.
'Sharing isn't a bad lesson to learn' - so true. I hadn't thought of it that way.
Love hearing all the stories of little siblings growing up together. To be honest, I have been so panicked wondering about coping initially, I hadn't even thought about further down the line when my DD will have a friend for life.
Feeling lots better!

i will have 19 mths. People keep telling me it's so much better than a 24 mths age gap, as the toddler wont be as jealous when they are a few months younger, the real jealousy kicks in at age 2 but by then they'll be used to their little brother or sister!

I will have 2 boys, my fear is they wil be SO boisterous together! not much i can do now though!!

In a few yrs we'll be glad of it.

I have 22 months between my boys and am now pregnant with another (there will be 24 month gap this time). Yes it is hard work, but it's also gorgeous to see them playing together. If you have a supportive partner, you will get through it.
Apart from crippling sickness, I'm glad the age gap will be similar again.
This is definitely my last though - no more rose tinted specs regarding pregnancy for me!!
I actually can't wait for this baby to be born so that we can crack on with mad family life!
Congratulations

Mouthful you make a very good point, the partner needs to be fully supportive for it to work.
Best of luck with DC3, will you find out the sex this time?

Thanks
I would like to think I can wait and have a surprise... But I am a sucker for finding out at 20 weeks!! Can't help myself. I don't mind either way - and to be honest, little boys melt my heart!!

My sister has 11 months of a gap between nephews. Obviously, I'm viewing at a distance. I believe it was hard work - two kids in nappies, two kids needing fed, two kids teething.

There were a lot of upsides, too. Because they were so close they did a lot of things together. They liked the same things and activities. They were always company for each other. They were a very happy family and the boys are very close now.

As for the love for the second child, I felt exactly like you. I felt guilty because I just knew that I couldn't love a child as much as I did my first. She took up my whole being, so how could there be any left for another child? Difficult to describe, but I just did, just as much.