Make me feel better about elcs...

[Skiptonlass]

Sodding placenta Previa has not moved so it looks like elcs time for Skip.

I really didn't want a cs.

Can anyone make me feel vaguely better about this? I know there are no medals for pushing them out and I know all the clinical reasoning why avoiding exsanguination is a Very Good Thing, but I'm still extremely upset about it. I hate the thought of being laid up recovering and incapable for weeks. This has been such a tough pregnancy with sickness and spd and now it's going to take me ages to get back to normality.

Apologies for the blatant self pity here. But please, tell me you all recovered beautifully and all that sort of thing. :(

Thanks everyone. I'm usually a pretty rational person, think the emotional reaction I had to this has caught me out a bit. I was surprised to feel so upset when I know its for the best and probably going to be fine. Interesting really when your empirical head says one thing and your squishy emotional bits another! (Places Spock - like scientist mask firmly back on)

Consultant appt next week so I'll talk through my options with them then.

Thanks to the pp who warned about spd and lying on back for an extended period - I will definitely take that on board!

Skipton how far along are you? I have heard of placentas moving up between the 32 and 36 week scan so if that's the case thast you are 32 weeks it is still possible. Mine moved the bloody wrong way in that time, so er that's also possible.

You are going to Have A Baby and that is a very exciting thing.

You do not have to concern yourself with weeing on an episiotomy cut or 3rd degree tears.

I've had two pretty difficult assisted births, and really, they're nothing much to write home about

I was in the same situation as you with PP that didn't move enough. I have had one natural delivery and one ELCS, there really are benefits to both, the best bits of ELCS are you don't feel any pain and your fanjo stays intact! I was very nervous about the surgery but remember they do it all the time. Recovery wise I wasn't laid up at all, I was up, dressed and mobile but incapable of housework which I actually found very annoying and poor DH was given many orders

I had an early induction (at 37+3) with DD1 due to obstetric cholestasis - 2 days of internals and monitoring, followed by a third day of epidural, having my waters broken and 9 hours of labour, before an episiotomy and a ventouse to finally pull her out. My stitches got infected and I was absolutely blooming exhausted after it.

20 months to the day later, I had an elective CS to deliver my twins. Like you, I was worried about the recovery time, particularly as I now had a toddler who would require picking up and frequent cuddles. I needn't have worried. I was sitting up in recovery, breastfeeding both babies within an hour of delivery (and it would have been quicker, except DT2 had had her foot in DT2's face in utero, and she therefore needed checking out!). I stayed in hospital for three days but that was through choice - DD1 was happy at home with my mum and I was getting to grips with having twins . I recovered far more quickly than from the vaginal birth with DD1 and was able to pick her up and carry her around within days.

I do understand how you feel...I have had three children, and have not experienced the anticipation and expectation of waiting to go into labour once and have actually only felt about 5 contractions in total! But don't let your disappointment overshadow what will still be a beautiful and wondrous time - holding your new baby for the first time.

(PS, by all means ask to have it done without a screen, but DH had a good look at my insides whilst they were pulling the DTs out and to this day, can't wipe the image from his mind .)

So, you can't have the birth you wanted. You will have a safely delivered and healthy child at the end though. That's the bit to focus on. I was born by elcs it has made no difference to me or my mum, and she went on to have 4 vaginal births after.

I'm seriously considering an ELCS next time around and these replies about only needing over the counter painkillers for a few days are swaying me even more - first time around I was on prescription painkillers for 12 weeks after a bad tear, and over the counter ones for a lot longer.

I haven't had one, although it's looking v likely due to a breech baby who hasn't budged yet.

You might find these links useful on how to ask for a more involved csection as these are more family focused. Not sure how / whether the approach is adopted everywhere but there's some parts that might be helpful to ask for - i.e. where the electrodes are placed, which way round the gown is etc:

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2613254/

You tube video of new approach

and then this that was sent to me by my birthing class instructor:

using a new technique in a cesarean delivery to have the baby exposed to some of mom's healthy microorganisms that normally transfer to her baby during a vaginal birth. This technique is still being studied so we don't know for sure how much of mom's microbiome the baby will get or what the long term impact will be on improving outcomes, but preliminary results look promising.

commonhealth.wbur.org/2014/06/birth-canal-bacteria-c-section

smilla yes I saw that research :) I was actually planning on swabbing him if they don't do it (probably too much information there but as a scientist I find that fascinating!)

abbey I'm 32 and a few days. I'm booked in for another scan and for the consultant to look at it at almost 34 - we will see what the placenta has to say for itself then... It was strangely placed, and looked very different from different angles (poor little chap is wearing it like a hat.)

Definitely no episiotomy, no housework and no pelvic floor damage - that sounds good to me :) plus my local hospital is one of the best in the world for maternal outcomes apparently.

Thanks everyone - this strong emotional reaction really caught me on the hop today. I will have a think about why such a strong reaction.

Your words of wisdom are much appreciated, all of you! Mumsnet at its best :)

The only thing I would say is don't count on the lack of pelvic floor damage! Keep up your exercises! I had an ELCS and I sometimes pee when I sneeze!

Hi,
Sorry not had chance to read thread but wanted to add some reassurance.
I planner home births but not meant to be. First was meconium, episiotomy and ventouse. Second was planned section due to footing breech. I too was upset about the section but didn't feel confident about a home breech birth and didn't want to risk the likely forceps in hospital.
I wrote a 'gentle section ' birth plan and the hospital accommodated everything (if your username is where you live then probably same hospital) and my recovery was brilliant. Recovering emotionally and physically from the first birth took twice as long (episiotomy was months!). I did take it easy, had a few days in bed (which I would whichever way I gave birth) and generally watched box sets and breast fed. It was honestly all really positive.
Still unsure what I will do this time....gonna decide nearer the time!
Good luck x

I've had 3 cs deliveries. dd "elective" (feet-first), ds1 emergency cs (PP, bleeding, which brought on prem labour), and ds2 - crash cs under ga (placenta percreta, oh my that was fun).

My elcs was lovely, looking back. I was annoyed at the time but it was so peaceful. I had a nice night's sleep, got up, had a shower, had a baby, fed my baby, had a mid-morning snack ... So lovely to cuddle my baby straight afterwards and not be sore and exhausted.

And with what you've been through, cs recovery is going to seem like a walk in the park.

But I do understand the "feeling cheated". It wasn't until I had ds1 and got overwhelmed with the gratitude of being alive that I really came to terms with having had an elcs the first time.

Dd is 13 now and nobody cares how she arrived

Skipton I had an ELCS and it was fine. The procedure itself is a bit full on but all that stuff about weeks of recovery and not being able to pick up your baby is a load of old twaddle in my experience...

I was up and about (shuffling a bit gingerly!) within 24 hours and pushed DC out of the hospital in a pram 3 days later. Pain was completely manageable with paracetamol and ibuprofen and although sleeping can be a bit uncomfortable for a few days depending on position (sleep on your back if you can) I was fine in a week and sleeping on my stomach within a fortnight.

I had dissolvable stitches so no one had to mess with me after and I didn't have any problems with infection or anything at all really...

Plus I had oramorph on the day of the section which was most excellent. Don't try to be brave immediately after surgery - take the drugs. I had virtually no post operative pain and that's because it was managed before it was noticeable.

Plus, best of all, you get your lovely baby. Overall it was a positive experience and I'd definitely have another one.

Weeks of recovery wasn't a load of old twaddle in my experience

I'm fairly fit and healthy but it did take me around 6 weeks to feel comfortable again and I stayed on the hospital painkillers for as long as they would allow. Ultimately it is major abdominal surgery and shouldn't be taken lightly,

There is no way I would have been driving within 4 weeks either. If you needed to do an emergency stop you can burst the internal layers of stitches.

I think everyone is different (as is evident from the experiences on this thread) and you just need to see how you feel.

My baby was breech and ELCS was the safest way for him to be delivered and that is the main thing, at the time I felt a bit robbed of my chance to birth him but he's 3 now and as a PP says how he arrived doesn't really matter now.

I'm now pg again and only 11 weeks so nowhere near a decision on VBAC or another ELCS but if I was told I had to have another section it wouldn't bother me at all.

Oh and as hippymama says the oramorph is fab!

They wouldn't let me take any of that home the bastards

I LOVED my ELCS experience! Calm, happy, positive and joyful. I was back driving again after 3 weeks (check with your ins co. but mine were fine as long as the drs were happy... It was about doing an emergency stop) and I recovered far, far quicker than my EMCS.

Also, I wrote a birth plan and it was totally respected and adhered to. You're still giving birth!

I totally understand the disappointment but it honestly was a lovely experience. Good luck OP.

EMCS here, completely understand your feelings. I was gutted for a while after, feeling like I hadn't 'properly' given birth or somehow not tried hard enough. Not helped at all by a lot of insensitive comments by other mums. This is definitely the worst bit and once I started telling them how thrilled I was with my section as it stopped me and my son from dying they tended to back off a bit! 15 months later I couldn't care less how he came out! Pg again and aiming for vbac as I can get home sooner to DS (it's due around Christmas) but may well change mind! Good luck!