Tell my midwife about anxiety?

[hearthattack]

Hoping for some advice about whether / how to have a chat with my mw when I see her on Tuesday...

I'm 26 weeks pregnant and am becoming more anxious as the weeks go on. I have a history of anxiety following the sudden and traumatic death of my mother when I was 26. For a long time after that I was hyper-vigilant and used lots of control tactics to manage the feeling that something tragic or life threatening could happen at any moment. These feelings came to the surface again a couple of years ago when I had a nasty cycling accident. I had some CBT then and found it really useful. I've mostly been fine since but aware that this is something I will probably always have to manage.

I've found it particularly hard in the last few weeks. Pregnancy and parenthood were always going to be triggers! I'm having a growth scan next week after reporting two episodes of reduced movement.

Even assuming everything is fine, I find the idea of going through the entire last trimester with only minimal check ups from the midwife difficult. One of the repercussions of my anxiety is that I no longer trust my judgement, so it's very hard to know when I'm being rationally concerned and when I'm being irrationally anxious. That all adds to my worry that I might be down-playing or neglecting something that could cause a serious problem.

I'm wondering if I should have a really honest conversation with my MW about this. She might be really supportive and discuss some strategies that could help, or she might just write me off as a neurotic first timer and take even less notice of any concerns I do raise.

Anyone got any advice about how to approach the subject with her, and what would and wouldn't be reasonable support to ask for?

Thanks for your help.

Yes, say everything you've said here.

Yes definitely mention it.

Ages ago I was on anti depressants for anxiety so once the baby is here they are going to see me an extra couple of times post birth which I am really grateful for as I was anxious about maybe being more susceptible to PND due to my past.

They will help and support you so don't worry.

If you explain it as clearly as you have here I can't imagine mw writing you off as an anxious first timer! Definitely talk to her...

Yes, do mention it. She can refer you for counselling (if you want) or to there may be a dedicated mental health team for pregnancy that takes this on.

She may also be able to arrange extra reassurance scans or MW visits if that would make you feel better.

I'd definitely mention it. I had quite a lot of anxiety in my pregnancy which I discussed with the midwife. They were very supportive, and arranged for me to have some extra appointments as I found that my anxiety built up between appointments so shorter gaps helped. They were extremely reassuring, I think it's something they come across a fair bit, and we're very happy to try and help.

Yes, definitely. I had a really similar problem - anxiety that I'd been controlling just fine after CBT flared up really badly while pregnant. Hormones are dicks! My midwife listened, and advised me to see the GP. I was referred for an immediate assessment to see how bad the problem was, and I'm doing another course of CBT now.

I found that I couldn't use some of the techniques I relied on to stop anxiety cycles while pregnant because I was no longer able to do the sort of intensive exercise I was used to. So, we've been working on new ways to break out of those cycles, and also on some stuff about how to identify and live with worries that it's impossible to find solutions to. It's been really helpful. I've also found that in the third trimester the hormonal stuff has changed, and I'm a lot less on touchy and on edge.

Some areas have a Dedicated mental health midwife you could ask to be referred to.
Also after 20 weeks often you have access to a phone number so can ring the hospital who will tell you to go to see them if you are concerned inbetween appointments. Do you have that sort of system that you can use?
Or worth asking your gp to see you if you cannot see the midwife.

Yes explain it to her. You obviously have very good insight into the causes of it and what you need. You sound very sensible and aware.