Terrifying dreams about humungobaby...

[Skeppers]

I am expecting a big baby. 35+3 with DC1. Consultant confirmed and currently projecting that he'll be at least 9lbs. AC and head measurement currently in 95th centile. Apparently this is perfectly fine because I am on the 'bigger' end of the scale myself (6ft, size 9 feet, built like a brick shithouse, etc.) so he has no concerns as no GD or other health issues and I am from a family of big babies myself. I am no longer under consultant led care as he's happy with how things are progressing. Which is good news.

BUT I have just recently started having terrifying dreams about the birth; baby getting stuck, me haemorrhaging and dying on the labour ward, having giant metal salad tongs shoved up my lady canal with no pain relief like some kind of medieval torture device..all kind of nasty permutations.

I was feeling weirdly laid back about the birth until the doc dropped this on me. I'm now pretty freaked out about it, if I'm honest, which I know won't help when the time comes. Possibly not helped by last night's NCT class which was all about labour interventions and there were lots of lovely (not) stories of forceps deliveries being exchanged.

My mum is tiny and managed to give birth to all of us with relative ease (my brother was just short of an 11 pounder and did get a bit stuck but he was still born without intervention) which gives me some hope, but does anyone have any positive tales of birthing big babies to give me some sort of reassurance and hopefully end the nightmares!?

Oh dear, you have my sympathy. If birth wasn't terrifying enough, now you've got one more thing to worry about.
I have no wisdom to share, other than: for every horror story out there, there are 10 untold stories of how everything went swimmingly. You just don't hear about those.

If your consultant thinks you are ok, then you should try not to worry too much. I was a bit in denial about birth, but kept dreaming about forgetting the baby on the tube or leaving it in the supermarket trolley.
don't watch Alien

You say don't watch 'Alien', but I have to admit part of me is kind of wishing that someone had already invented those machines like in 'Prometheus'...you know, where she basically performs a self-c section to get the alien out? It takes literally 2 minutes, she gets stapled up afterwards, Bob's yer uncle!

I think you're right about only hearing the horror stories. It's like reviews on TripAdvisor: people are more likely to complain when something goes wrong than post positive feedback when everything goes to plan. Or if you're worried about something you're more likely to get drawn to or notice negative stories than positive ones.

There is a technical term for this but my baby-brain won't let me recall it right now...

I had a 9lb 6oz baby and I'm 5' 6" and medium build. His shoulders and head were particularly massive.

I struggled to push him out (partially because I had an epidural as I was on the induction drip) so needed some help with a ventouse but that was fine. I did have a pretty bad haemorrhage, but that was also fine really (dealt with really well by the hospital staff and no lasting effects). Even though on paper my birth was a difficult one, I never felt out of control (of the interventions) or like things were happening to me - I was treated with proper dignity and care.

I just wanted to share that things can go "wrong" but still be ok!

Just wanted to share that

Skeppers I think you mean selection bias.

Not me, but a friend of mine gave birth to a nearly-10lb-er (after an induction for being over dates) with just gas and air, and no intervention. Both she and her DH are tall, but not particularly broad. She's due in a few weeks with DC2, so it can't have been that bad

Thanks lentilpot. That's reassuring. I suppose you're right, if you sort of 'expect' things to go wrong, then you're mentally prepared for every eventuality and will see the interventions as helpful rather than a hindrance.

YES chiruri! It's confirmation bias I was trying to think of. THANK YOU!

I had a 9lb 12 baby - no bother at all. No drugs, 20 minute labour, just shot out. Felt as if I could have jogged the 20 miles home.

My 7lb 7oz pfb had to be dragged out with high cavity forceps after 26 hours of quite hard labour. (No drugs - what a mistake that was!) Could hardly walk afterwards.

I'm 5ft 7 and normal build.

Hope it all goes well for you, OP. Think happy thoughts!

My 8lber was a 72 hour labour with epidural & ventouse delivery. My 9lb2er was 1h36 min labour with no pain relief (& I didn't really need it!). You may be fine, especially if your baby takes after you in build (I'm only 5'6").

Skeppers

I read recently in Maggie Howell's Natal Hypnotherapy book that (anecdotally) women often find labour easier/faster with their larger babies because of the increased pressure on the cervix stimulating a greater oxytocin response. As someone also expecting a larger than average baby I just keep reminding myself of this!

DC1 was over 9lbs and I had a forceps delivery - didn't feel a thing thanks to epidural and I healed quite quickly.

My DC2 was 9lb 8oz with massive head (on the 98th centile). I've nothing but positive memories of the birth - just gas and air, no interventions, no stitches etc I'm 5ft 3 and quite small.

I was told (by midwife) that bigger babies are often easier because gravity helps out

You have the baby that's right for your body, you can do it.