Sex During Pregnancy - Doesn't Feel Right

[highlander]

I feel completely embarassed starting this

I know that sex won't 'shake the baby out' or anything but I'm finding pregnancy a bit uncomfortable. DH and I were apart for the first 4 months as he moved overseas ahead of me. I'm having fairly typical (I think) 2nd trimester round ligament pain. It's not been much fun for the last 4 weeks, although it is getting much better (I'm 20wks now).
Also, whenever I'm aroused, My uterus rounds up into a ball and the baby kicks like mad. It kind of feels like we're shagging with the baby watching us - I know it's silly but it makes me feel really uneasy, like it's wrong.

I've discussed all of this with DH and he is being absolutely wonderful; not a twinge of resentment and he says he's happy that I can be honest with him.

But I always thought that sex during pregnancy was relatively unaffected - I think if I'm honest I feel like a bit of a pregnancy failure

Had the same feelings Re:having sex in front of baby who starts kicking the minute you and dh try anything
we always ended up in fits of giggles and had a pretty useless sex for a few months!!!
Afraid a similar dilema exists after baby is born..do you do it while baby is asleep in cot in same room???
Anyway i guess what I'm trying to say is that what you're going through is pretty normal, look on the bright side...at least your dh is understanding about the whole thing, there are probably lots of men out there who aren't

Someone had a thread about this a few months ago. From what i remember, pregnant mums were pretty evenly split between the " Sex during pregnancy - no way!!" camp and the "oh yes please, i've never felt so sexy"!! Not many middle of the road responses. So if you and your DP are happy to stick to cuddles...that's great!! I think you are pretty normal ( whatever that is!!!)

We are refraining for the first trimester under doctors orders (glad of the rest to be honest). When I was pg with ds I enjoyed sex right up to the end but it doesnt sound very appealing right now. If dh is happy not to, then go with it.

Have had very little sex during this pregnancy. A couple of times right at first (6 weeks ish) before symptoms kicked in. Then a couple of times during second trimester and thats about it. Once I started feeling better, I had started looking pregnant and the whole tighening uterus thing had kicked in and DH wasn't comfortable with it. Now at 38+ weeks I can't be bothered and DH obviously still feels the same way. So I've been having curries and pineapple instead...

much more appetizing choice Bozza!

We're the same DP won't touch my bump or boobs during sex now and it does feel a bit strange. He loves me being pregnant and is always feeling my belly at other times.

For the first 3 months though I couldn't stay awake long enough to get up to anything.

me and dp had the oposite problem i wanted it and he was scared to even touch me if he cuddled me it would be a gentle one and he was always saying i dont want to risk hurting the baby and now ds is born i dont want it and he does is there no hope lol

OH don't feel a failure highlander
I rember that balling uterus feeling
Anyway, as mummytojames says, in the last trimester you may find your DH may be anxious about disturbing the baby during sex, some men feel that way, so that may take the pressure off you.

ooh, this is all very reassuring - I've been worrying for weeks that I'm a freak

refraining here too until 12 weeks or so - DR said not a bad idea given my histories (m/c) It's hard (sorry not intended) for dh I know, but I'd rather wait a while longer. I'm only 7 weeks. Poor dh!

What worries me a bit is it's not likely to get any better after the baby's born (soreness, tiredness etc...). But it looks like everyone is more or less in my case!!