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Pregnancy

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Original poster

Sex after a C- Section? How long did you wait?

35 replies

Halleberry · 21/05/2015 19:58

I had my baby girl a week ago my ELCS. I've healed very well, got my dressing off today and all looks good. I'm exhausted from baby, my PND and mental health aren't great and I don't really feel "in the mood" anyway. There is also No pressure what so ever from my DP. Infact he hasn't even mentioned it or tried. It's not the right time just yet. But I'm wondering when I should maybe try? How long did other mums wait before having sex after a baby by section? I don't want to leave it to long or I think it will be a little awkward because ive over thought it. I'm also very self conscious now about my belly (terrible over hang this time round) and my belly has became a map of Britain just wondered if I should wait a few more weeks or bite the bullet and go for it??

OP posts:

FreeButtonBee · 22/05/2015 10:47

12 weeks here. Was probably physically ready before then but twins meant we were both extremely tired and getting the stars aligned and two babies asleep at a time when we could be bothered was tricky.

Number3cometome · 22/05/2015 13:11

As soon as the bleeding stopped both times although took it very slowly and carefully.

Doesn't all have to be about penetration, there are other intimate things you can do together which are just as nice.

I am 31+5 now and we are still having very regular sex (daily), this is a different partner to my last two. I am hoping it won't be too long after birth that we will have sex again, but OH has said we should wait a 'few months' so I can heal. I was a bit 'WTF'!!

knittingirl · 22/05/2015 13:41

I didn't have a section, but it was 9 months. Poor dh! We tried about four months after, but I'd had a rough birth and mentally just wasn't there, so we waited longer.

Original poster

Halleberry · 22/05/2015 14:17

I'm actually quite surprised to hear Some women waited as long as that. With my DS nearly 11 years ago my then DP and I had sex the following week. I was a lot younger obviously though and felt ready. This time round I don't feel ready yet. Not quite sure why and it upsets me a little that I don't feel emotionally connected to my DP enough to have sex yet (still love and adore him but the sex side is gone for me just now) .... I will definitely be waiting a little longer but I don't want to wait to long that it becomes awkward xx

OP posts:

CultureSucksDownWords · 22/05/2015 14:24

I don't think it's necessarily that surprising, especially if like me it was after a long unsuccesful labour followed by an EMCS followed by a bad recovery.

Plus, for me, breastfeeding pretty much wiped out my interest in sex. Nothing to do with not being emotionally connected to my DP, just hormones and recovering from what had been quite an intense and stressful start to my DS's life.

It won't be awkward with your DP if you talk about it with him, and explain how you're feeling.

flanjabelle · 22/05/2015 14:34

About 4months... But it didn't have much to do with the c section.

Saltedcaramel2014 · 22/05/2015 14:54

You mention PND and your mental health not being great at the moment. Are you seeking/getting support for this?

Don't worry about losing it - you will be ready at some point soon, but it sounds like you need to get some solid emotional support in place. The two aren't mutually exclusive of course.

To answer the question - for me it was 5 weeks after EMCS. It was fine. But then, with no sleep, not for ages.

Foggymist · 22/05/2015 15:40

I'm not that tired and feel fine and connected to my husband, but a swollen and internally bruised stomach and a wound with the ability to split open don't exactly scream "let's have sex" to me. Of course the sex side isn't there for you right now, it's been less than 2 weeks yes? Tbh I would think this for you is part of your overall PND/mental health worries at the moment. Forget about sex for now, it's really at the bottom of the pile of priorities.

Original poster

Halleberry · 23/05/2015 00:21

Yeah think your right. Just over thinking everything right now. Worrying about everything. I don't feel like sex at all just now. I've never felt less like it in all my life actually, I just thought maybe I should make the effort, but ur right, it's not a priority at all. My mental health and being ok for my baby is most important xx

OP posts:

plummyjam · 23/05/2015 07:28

I think painful intercourse after c-section is under reported. I had this after an emcs - like vaginismus, everything just felt really tight. It went completely after about 8 months. Possibly a combination of post-partum hormones and breastfeeding.

It worried me a bit because I started to think it was something psychological but somehow it just disappeared after a while.

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