First appointment with midwife in 6 days and I need to appear heavier than I am any suggestions on how?

[twinkletwinkle04]

I'm pregnant with my 5th child and all my pregnancies have been high risk due to me being a tiny bit underweight for my heigh (167cm, 49.9kg).
All my children were born healthy but the fuss and constant scans were horrendous. I'm trying to avoid it this time by putting weight on in 6 days I'm failing miserably cause I don't seem to be getting any heavier. I've tried protein milkshakes but they are making me I'll. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. As much as I'm a tad underweight I am healthy I'm just naturally skinny.

Why were your babies induced 2 and 3 weeks early? There will be a medical reason for that, surely? Don't you know? again...

At my hospital OP your babies would be low birth weight and 10 days early is term. My DS was 4 weeks early but it still counts as low birth weight officially even though 6lb9 was good for a preemie it doesn't matter.
I doubt they'd induce you because you are underweight there must be another reason. Are you at the same hospital? I'd request a debrief so you can understand the reasons

At my hospital you'd be consultant led due to:
Previous premature birth (1)
Low birth weight babies (3 or 4)
Possibly due to the reasons for your induction too depending on what those were

You can get mass gainer protein powder, I can't remember the name what my partner used to drink but each serving contained 1200 calories ()

However, I'm not sure about their suitability for pregnancy! He just drinks them for bulking season!

A naturally very, very slim woman should not have low-weight babies - THIS is why you are deemed high risk.

According to the NHS bmi calculator your bmi is only 17 which is underweight. This is also your 5th pregnancy in 7 years which is a big strain on your body and risk increases at your 5th. Your babies have also all been varying degrees of small. Were they induced for iugr?

I am normally quite a strong advocate for an unmedicalised pregnancy but in this case I think you should be honest with your midwife and follow their guidance as to weight gain/diet/exercise during this pregnancy.

What has been your weight gain during your previous pregnancies?

You say you don't count calories but maybe you should to make sure you are eating enough. You should be eating 200 extra a day during pregnancy. Have they ever referred you to a dietitian? If you think your diet is ok then maybe take a food diary with you to your midwife appointment to show them what you eat?

You do seem to be in denial about your weight 'problem' and this could be a sign of an eating disorder. They wouldn't be doing their job if they didn't consider the risks of this to you and your baby.

That makes more sense... You are high risk unfortunately, no two ways about it.
Please don't try to deceive your midwife or consultant - firstly, you'll alienate them, secondly, it won't work and most importantly, it's vital they have full information to offer you the correct care. I know it can seem like you're being treated as a passive vehicle and all the focus is on the baby, not your needs. The best way to deal with this is to engage with the team treating you. Tell them your opinions and your fears. Ask them to explain why they are taking the route they do. Make them involve you in discussions etc.

I wouldn't use the protein powders during pregnancy - they can strain your kidneys a bit and they're already on overdrive in pregnancy x

Because I'm skinny I must have an eating disorder? That's unfair!! I don't judge people for being overweight. I have had tests for overactive thyroid etc because I do eat more than your average "fatty" everything was negative. I'm not asking about my supposed eating disorder which in denial or not I'd have no reason to hide on this. I am still quite young and only looking for advice on the matter without any accusations being thrown at me. This would be a wasted exercise then. With this being my first time posting surely I should be given the benefit of the doubt, that I'm being truthful?

You've been advised not to bury your head in the sand about the reasons your pregnancies are deemed high risk, apparently without you even knowing why ( ask , fgs!) and that it would be foolish in the extreme to pretend to your midwife that you are any weight other than the real one.
What answers would have made you happy?

Just because you're skinny doesn't mean you have an eating disorder. I meant faking your weight (by putting stones in your pockets as suggested by some people) would make it look like you did if they found out.
When I was younger I was underweight. I ate like a pig but still never put weight on. It changed in my late 20s and now I'm considered 'normal' but I totally get why you're upset with comments about your weight. I had strangers on the bus telling me to "eat a sandwich"! Its horrible and you don't deserve it any more than a fat person deserves being told by strangers to "go on a diet".
Human beings come in all shapes and sizes. That's what makes us beautiful!
Good luck with everything. Be honest about your feelings, get them to explain why they're putting you in high risk. Get them to include you. Be strong, I know you said earlier that you find it difficult to be assertive, (and God knows I'm a fine one to dish out assertiveness advice) but try. Even get some self help books on assertiveness or get some counselling if you can. You deserve to be taken seriously, and if you feel like the hcp are pushing you around then start taking control. Just say to yourself, "I deserve to be heard. I am entitled to these feelings." Because you do and you are.

In my area you would have the extra scans regardless of your weight but because of your previous babies' weight at birth. So it wouldn't matter if you did put on a few pounds.

I'm sorry you don't really want to hear it op but to maintain a bmi of 17 whilst "eating more than your average fatty" is a physical impossibility unless you're doing loads of exercise (and even then it's unlikely as you'd carry muscle).

I'm overweight but deemed low risk in this pregnancy. I'm having to have extra scans because my son was born at 6lb 5oz- no relation to my weight- and it looks like this baby is going to be slightly small too. The scans are a total pain in the arse but you really shouldn't lie to hcp to avoid them.

Just out of curiously, what is considered to be a low birth weight these days?

I can understand your concerns op, and the pressure you must have been under to be pushed into having early induction. I certainly wouldn't have been happy about that. I wouldn't say 6lbs odd was a low birth weight 2-3 weeks early.

How old are you OP?

I'm only asking because you said you were "quite young" , but are having 5th child. I am wondering if (depending on your age) midwives are judging you on that too?

I am also wondering if the high risk is perhaps to you as well as the baby eg you cannot give blood if below a certain weight, but there is a chance of blood loss during birth etc.

What reason was given for the previous inductions?

I'm sorry but I don't believe you are real. You are making this up.

I have two babies on the low side. Both lighter than yours. 2.5kg for my first and 2.8kg for my second. That is 5 lb 8 oz according to google. The cut off for low birth weight is 2.5kg and that means only your daughter is under. All the others are normal birth. Both of mine had extra growth scan at 36 weeks because they fall under the 10% size. My second was not deemed high risk just because my first is just on the cut off. I was midwife led care and DD2 born in a MLU.

They look at more than low birth weight for high risk. And that your children aren't actually all low birth weight. You can google and it will tell you the 2.5kg cut off.

I'm also under the weight for giving blood. So that's not a reason for high risk. I'm currently 47kg but I am only 160cm. So that's in the healthy BMI range.

Or that you aren't telling us all the reason behind the high risk care. There is more to it than your babies' weight and your weight.

You need to be honest with your midwife and discuss your concerns. They do not make someone high risk for no reason- I would ask the midwife to go into all the reasons and to highlight the risks for you.

This being your first thread is irrelevant. It doesn't guarantee you're telling the truth or lying .

hi OP. I'm similar height / weight / BMI to you.

this is my second pregnancy and I weighed a few kilos more at the start of my first, so was normal BMI then, and underweight BMI now. Not a choice to lose weight, I'm just naturally skinny like you, have never been able to put on weight, can eat all the cakes and chips that I want (won't feel very well but won't put on weight!), and in the few years since having my first I have naturally lost a bit of weight as I am rushing around more than before, and have been picking up a growing baby/toddler/pre-schooler and running around at the park, commuting to work etc. I would prefer not to have lost the extra few kilos and have tried everything to put it on, but nothing (including disgusting protein shakes) has worked.

I have been criticised about my weight and been accused of being anorexic many times over the years. Which I think is massively offensive and wrong and I would never and have never criticised anyone for their weight.

This pregnancy, at booking appointment, I was deemed higher risk and told I'd need to see a consultant and get an extra growth scan - simply due to my BMI.

I don't mind an extra scan/appt - and my first DC was 7lb 12oz which is perhaps where we differ. I have been referred to a dietician to see if I need to adjust my diet (but doubt it will make any difference to my weight after everything I've tried).

As some of the nicer PPs have said, be honest with the midwife, ask exactly what the reason for high risk is (e.g. your weight, previous DCs' weights - plus anything else?) and what the extra appointments are for, and whether they are all really necessary. And eat whatever you want, don't listen to others' criticisms and if you do have to have lots of extra appts just try to think of it as nice to have someone taking extra care, rather than a stress-inducing experience. I imagine it must be hard to go to extra appts when you have 4 kids to look after so I hope you have help with childcare to do so.

Good luck and be nice to yourself xx

At my hospital the cut off was 3kg, DS was 2.9kg so only just in the bracket, so it seems they vary. Just ask why you're high risk OP. Also at my hospital if you are very young (teenage) there are extra appointments. It sounds like there's possibly a few reasons but you need to ask them to explain if you don't understand why they are doing things

Why were you induced though, OP? Had the babies stopped growing?

I had four babies and my start weight was exactly the same as yours (though I was an inch shorter, admittedly). No problems, and in fact I had large babies (9lbs 2oz - 11lbs 3oz!).

Your babies were pretty small though, even allowing for slight prematurity. I expect that's why they're concerned about this pregnancy.

Hello, I know you must be frustrated but I wouldn't try and gain weight quickly beforehand or lie about your weight. Just be honest. Explain what you have here and that you appreciate the guidelines however you do not wish to have the extra care. She may well take into account what you are saying. Good luck x

I'd offer you a fat transplant, if they did such things. I've got some extra.

I've only had one baby but I weighed far less than you do (and am a similar height) when I got pregnant. I put plenty of weight on during my pregnancy but I was approx 7 stone just beforehand, maybe a pound or two more, so about 45kg pre-pregnancy. I had a 7lb baby bang on her due date. It sounds like the fact that your babies come early and don't weigh enough is the risk factor here, not your weight (unless they have a reason you haven't mentioned for worrying about your weight) as my weight was never even mentioned.