When did you tell your parents you were pregnant?

[Bayswaterbelle]

Hi, I'm 36 and 9+6 (first pregnancy) and it wasn't planned. We do want children and we knew we wanted this baby from about 3 minutes after I peed on the stick ;-) I think we're both excited and happy and freaking out all at once. I've spent the last few weeks getting my head around the changes coming and how I feel about everything. I've told a couple of close friends who are similar age, one of whom had problems getting and staying pregnant, thankfully now has 2 healthy children, so I think that may have coloured my thoughts a bit, but I was adamant I wasn't going to tell my parents until after 12 week scan because I wanted to wait until we saw a heartbeat. They aren't pushy but I know they want grandchildren and we've been married nearly 4 years.

However, tomorrow I'm going to be ten weeks and I have my booking in appointment with the midwife, and all I can think is how much I want my mum. I know some of this will be hormones - not loving the mood swings - but I've gone from thinking it would be selfish to tell her if things didn't work out, to now worrying that she'll be upset I didn't tell her earlier! I haven't seen her for about 3 weeks and she's been pretty busy, but do you think I should pick up the phone or would she rather know in person, when I see her in 2 weekends time - going down to stay with them for bank holiday weekend?

Sorry, I know I'm asking you all to be mind readers, I just feel like the same thoughts are going round my head and not getting anywhere.

I told DM & DMIL a few days after we found out. We live abroad and I was an emotional wreck. I didn't want to tell them too soon but I just really wanted my mum at the same time. I'm the end my DH text my mum and asked her when she was free for a Skype. So both mothers were told at 5 odd weeks. No one else got told until last week (16 weeks). I wanted to go home and tell the rest of my family face to face. So glad I did.

Waited until I was about 14 weeks and had the scan. I wouldn't have wanted them around if anything went wrong but first time round it didn't. When I tried for 2nd again didn't say anything but miscarried at 10 weeks and 9 weeks and glad I hadn't told them. However, it's very much a personal choice.

I told my dm around 8 weeks so about 3 weeks after finding out. My df I handed him a scan photo at 13 weeks!

It's a really personal thing and those who are really close to their parents probably tell them right after poas, but not everyone would. I sure haven't as I know my mother will be very unenthusiastic. If anything goes wrong I'll tell her. I'm waiting until after first scan so she won't try and push me to abort.
Not everyone has lovely supportive parents unfortunately.

Congratulations, op when's your due date?

We told both sets of parents a week after BFP. I wanted to wait but we were going to a wedding & friends who knew we were ttc would have guessed when I wasn't drinking - we wanted the parents to know first so told them early (at 5wks) DP brother came back from abroad so told him too rather than waiting another 5 weeks & doing it over Skype. No one else until after scan Apart from my girlfriends who I just couldn't keep it secret from

In theory around Dec 7th, although we haven't had any scans yet. My parents aren't perfect but I can trust them to be supportive on big stuff, so I am looking forward to telling them. Have now arranged to have dinner with my mum on Friday as she's busy most of the week, so that gives me a bit more time to myself before it becomes family news, I guess.

Told my mum early on, because I needed to go and be sick! My dad I was going to wait till scan but we went to lunch and ordered a cheeseboard and I couldn't eat it. Had to explain myself and couldn't think of a lie!

I told my DM at 4 weeks, but she twigged. Told my in-laws on Friday at 6 weeks and I'm telling my dad this afternoon. We also told our very close friends, but they're like family. That's all we're telling until 20 weeks though.

Pretty much immediately, I really wanted my mum. Hormones are real, and the things you feel because of them are real - don't feel like you should ignore something because it's "just" hormones.

I told mine straight away, via phone as I live abroad. They've been very supportive and not at all pushy - they are well aware things can go wrong early on and didn't overwhelm me during that time. I'm quite a private person but this I did want to share.

I had really severe morning sickness for the first couple of months and I was glad of their support as we didn't tell anyone else until we had the 13 week scan. It made it a tiny bit more bearable to be able to pick up the phone and talk to someone who had been through it all before.

Congratulations. I'm sure your mum will be thrilled

I see my parents a lot and we're really close so I told mine the day after I found out. I was about 4 weeks.

Pregnancy 1 we told my parents at around 4 weeks. Unfortunately I MC'd but I was glad my mum & dad were there to support us.

This time I initially thought I'd like to wait until 12 week scan but got to 5/6 weeks and was desperate to tell them so we did. Told FIL at 7 weeks and will tell MIL when we see her next & I'll be 9 weeks by then.

Fugghetaboutit, congratulations on your pregnancy! I'm sorry you can't count on your mum to be more supportive. When are you due?

This thread has been really helpful - I felt a lot better after just posting, and I felt better having decided I could tell them whenever I want, and don't have to wait for the date I'd originally fixed on.

mumofmunchkin, I know you're right and hormones are real, it's just that at the moment because my emotions seem to change at the drop of a hat it's difficult to trust them :-)

My first pregnancy was ectopic and I told dm before dh as I was in hospital and couldn't get hold of him first.

Second/third pregnancy I rang them at about six weeks when we had had scans checking it was in the right place.

This time I texted them a couple of days after I possible so I was only 4 weeks but they would know first if I miscarry. We won't tell dh family til after the scan but they have v little to do with us and we wouldn't call on them in the event of problems.

I told mine at 6 weeks in my first pregnancy. I sadly miscarried that pregnancy, but that made me even more glad I'd told people - my miscarriage was not quick, I had to go in for surgical management after weeks of bleeding, and I was a hormonal and emotional mess for a couple of months. I needed the support I got, and I needed people to know why I was being such a bellend.
This time around I felt like I'd be asking too much of people if things went wrong, so I waited. I had early bleeding and was scanned at 6.5 and 8 weeks, and told my parents after the 8 week scan showed a healthy, normal, growing embryo.

Just said, 'I'm pregnant'.

Didn't bother waiting for 12 week scan.

Thank you, op

Due date is 2nd January. Already have a Christmas Day baby so hoping for a New Years one now

I'm 15 weeks and haven't told my parents yet

I've been so sick and tired and not really in the mood to tell people
I'll feel different I'm sure when the sickness passes

Also - had a late miscarriage recently - so I keep wondering if I really am still pregnant even though I had a scan a few weeks ago and everything was ok

At least it makes the wait shorter for everyone else.

I know MIL is going to think it's so weird we kept it quiet for so long - she would think its normal to share the news the minute you find out

My parents 4 weeks as I needed their emotional support and help with babysitting the children.

Inlaws - 12 weeks, not particularly close.

Told parents and in-laws a few days after BFP. First pregnancy and we are far away from home, I wanted them to know and if I'd miscarried I wanted their support.

Fugghetaboutit a new year baby would be very exciting!!