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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

To go to NCT or not to go to NCT?

26 replies

dancinglorna1984 · 02/05/2015 20:01

Hello, I am 27+2 with my first baby and I am feeling a bit down in the dumps. I know most of this is probably my hormones, but I just feel like everything is a bit of a struggle emotionally at the moment. We have no family close by and don't have a big circle of friends and we don't really get out much so I am feeling a bit isolated. A few people have mentioned that NCT classes were a really good way of getting to know other parents and I just wondered if anyone had previous experience of this? Thanks in advance

OP posts:

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CultureSucksDownWords · 02/05/2015 20:05

Yes it can be. I have a good friend from my NCT class, and the whole group still gets together now and again 3 yrs later. I guess it will depend on who exactly is in your group, but it's definitely a good idea if you're feeling a bit isolated. It's very useful when all the babies arrive to have people who are in the same boat to talk to.

mrsmilkymoo · 02/05/2015 20:17

I did the nct classes for similar reasons to you, and had hoped to make friends, but the people on my course, although all lovely, were from quite a wide geographical area and so we didn't really meet up afterwards. However, once DD was born I attended an nct bumps and babies group, which was free, and met a really fab bunch of local women.

AbbeyRoadCrossing · 02/05/2015 20:26

I couldn't afford them and I hear mixed things from friends. I think a lot depends on who's on the course with you and the teacher. Some made friends for life, some really disliked it - luck of the draw I guess. If you want a free option some Sure Start centres do pregnancy clubs.
And if you don't do it don't worry. I was so worried as I'm in a very nct area and people said I'd be isolated if I didn't, but you'll meet people at baby things.
Hope you enjoy it if you go for it

AbbeyRoadCrossing · 02/05/2015 20:27

Forgot to say you can go to nct meet ups without doing the course - coffee mornings, bumps meetups etc

jellymaker · 02/05/2015 20:30

Yes go although they do lots of groups without having to pay for antenatal classes. Also check out other local baby groups. Your midwife or hv will know some. Good luck

orangutanhihio · 02/05/2015 21:22

Yes I'd do Nct if you can get on a course. I really enjoyed the course I did and meet up weekly with some of the mums I met on the course, three years later!

BreeVDKamp · 02/05/2015 21:26

I tried booking a course at 20 weeks and everything was booked up in our area (tried about 4 different 'local' areas), so if you're going to try and book them, try now!!

Deffo go to the coffee mornings/bumps and babies etc even if you can't get on a course :)

applecore0317 · 03/05/2015 00:47

I've just finished my NCT course and really enjoyed it, and have already arranged weekly meet ups with the people we met.

We had a three hour session on breast feeding which was great and they also offer support with feeding after the course has finished. Lucky in that our course leader was lovely and the people that attended live in the same town

Ficidy · 03/05/2015 07:22

Sorry for going OT, but can someone tell me what happens at the nct course? Thanks.

applecore0317 · 03/05/2015 07:27

Each one is different depending on what the group needs. In the first session we talked about what we would like to know and what we wouldn't.

She then tailored each class to suit. Went through the stages of labour, pain relief, birthing positions, techniques that our partners could use to support us through birth, breast feeding, importance of skin to skin, formula feeding, what to expect if you have a ceserean etc

sianihedgehog · 03/05/2015 07:34

I looked into it, but it cost £180! When I told my midwife that I wasn't doing it because it cost almost as much as my car, she gave me a flyer for a lottery funded course being run out of the children's centres which has free spaces on a first come first served basis and looks pretty similar. I'm much more excited about that - I had trouble imagining making lifelong friends with anyone who could afford the NCT one.

Luciferbox · 03/05/2015 07:38

I know how you feel, I'm 27 weeks and feeling all frazzled and emotional at the moment, bloody hormones. With DS1 I didn't do NCT but joined my local baby group once he was born. It was a life saver.

Smitten1981 · 03/05/2015 07:39

I didn't go and now wish I had. I have lots of friends who don't have babies but find it quite lonely not having any other mummy friends. I do go to baby classes but a lot of the NCT mums are very cliquey and just stick to their group of friends so I never get beyond a bit of pleasant chit chat. Also I wish I had taken a breastfeeding class too, that would have been really helpful.

NerrSnerr · 03/05/2015 07:43

We did the nct and it was great. Our babies are about 8 months and we still meet weekly, but obviously it's luck of the draw with the group. I also go to groups at the library (bounce and rhyme), a local toddler group and a baby group at the sure start centre. I knew no one as we moved when I was pregnant and I now have a great circle of friends.

ch1134 · 03/05/2015 08:45

The course was a pile of rubbish but I have made some good friends, one in particular who has been invaluable. Worth it for me.

TheLastThneed · 03/05/2015 08:51

It might be worth checking out the local mum groups on Facebook. My local group is fab and lots of people have made some good friendships. It was formed after DD was born, but definitely would have been a great help. X

BikeRunSki · 03/05/2015 09:28

I went for similar reasons to you OP, and also found the discussion on pain relief options and the c section role play useful. The friends I made were fairly superficial, and I have not remained in touch with many since we started returning to work. Nearly 7 years on though, there are still some very strong lifelong friendships going though. We're not as well off as the rest of the group and were kind of filtered out when they started going away for weekends that cost a months mortgage payment to us. They have been all over the world on holiday since.

I made some brilliant friends at the local NCT coffee group and parent/tot playgroup though. None of my antenatal class took up this side of NCT, but I found it full of much more me type people.

SomewhereIBelong · 03/05/2015 09:35

look on - dare I say it - Netmums - I met 2 of my closest friends through a local group for mums to be advertised on there.

NCT was not for me - not just because of the cost, but because due to the cost it excludes a whole swathe of society which I personally feel is just wrong.

maroonedwithfour · 03/05/2015 09:38

I have heard the actual courses are crapola and expensive. Have a look on the nct website to see if there are any meet ups, usually free or couple ££.

AnythingNotEverything · 03/05/2015 09:42

I believe NCT have reductions for families in receipt of certain benefits. Also, they tag on annual NCT membership which you can deselect and save about £60.

I really benefitted from having a group of likeminded mums who were dealing with the same thing at the same time it was also nice to have friends to go to groups with. That said, it's total luck whether you like the people on your course.

They don't offer the same antenatal learning, but for peer support the antenatal groups on MN are brilliant. I'm on two and couldn't be without them

lechie · 03/05/2015 10:38

I'm not sure I got an awful lot out of the courses, but meeting new mums was invaluable to me.

Initially, we met every week, and it was great to be able to ask questions and share our worries. All our babies were born within a month of each other (four of them within a week) so it was always reassuring to know that they were going through the same stuff too.

Now our children are older, and it'll soon be twelve years since we first met, we no longer see each other weekly. We managed it probably until our children were 7 or 8, but then after school activities took over. We meet every half term now, and sometimes have a mums' night inbetween then. I'd still call them good friends and so would say the money was worth it for us.

applecore0317 · 03/05/2015 10:48

Just wanted to add that the only way we could afford it was to pay it in monthly installments, and split the cost between us. They are a charity which is why it costs

FlossyCat · 03/05/2015 12:22

We did NCT and i would definitely recommend it, I now have a group of friends I meet up with weekly and they were invaluable support in the early days when we would email in the middle of the night. It is of course luck of who is on your course. They are expensive, most of the people on my course had a profession / fairly good job so I guess the people likely to spend the money are more likely to have a 'career'. The content helped to prepare us as much as you can be prepared and was especially good for ideas for relaxation and ways my husband could support me. I didn't do the nhs classes but wish I had done both, this time I will do them as can't afford the NCT course for second time parents! If you can afford it do it :)

Siennasun · 03/05/2015 13:27

I did NCT specifically so I'd have people to spend time with during the week when I was on mat leave.
The course itself was rubbish, but was more than worth the money to have a group of mums to go to baby groups and out for lunch, coffee, etc with.
Since we've all gone back to work I haven't kept in touch with anyone, but will still say hi and have a chat if I bump into any of them.

Cornishblues · 03/05/2015 22:13

For me too it was much more about meeting other people having babies at exactly the same time, which is a lifesaver when you need friends to swap emails with in the small hours and have coffee with during the day. Having said that antenatal yoga classes, aquafit or similar classes are just as good for meeting people (and not everyone will be first timers, which is great) and can be better if you get to know people over several weeks, and they don't come with the hefty nct price tag.

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