Is BCP 99% effective? Possible pregnancy? My BCP & breakthrough bleeding

[thestaircase]

Hello, sorry if anything in this post is TMI,
Sexually I only have one guy that is my husband, so excuse me for my ignorance in sex. I’m newlywed so I’m still new into this whole BCP thing. I'm only 3 months into marriage.

May I ask. Is anyone here who are on BCP or are expert on Birth control pills. I have a few questions. What are the chances of get pregnant while on BCP? Not likely right? Because BCP is 99% effective if taking correctly right? And did anyone get breakthrough bleeding like I get?

I guess I want to talk about BCP and the possible of pregnancy while on the pills. Anyone who know alot about BCP, please share your experience.
And if anyone here who have alot of experience in birth control. Beside BCP, are there any other birth control out there is more effective? Like most effective birth control with least side effects. Please let me know, thank you.
I heard about the rod arm implant thing, it is better than BCP? Does it have any side effects like the BCP did?

I took all my pills on time, exactly on the same time everyday. I never miss one pills, so I know I’m 99% safe. I am also NOT on any Antibiotics so it not messing up my BCP
Last month I got my period came late. And 'breakthrough bleeding', heard this is normal for those who new to BCP as their body still adjust to the BCP

And this month, it is the 20th of April and I still have not get my period yet. That means I am 3 WEEKS late. I am way passed my placebo pills. Now this is kindda scary because I never been this late before in my life. Despite being 3 weeks late, I still take my pills on time everyday.

I’m 30 and husband is 29, and we married. My husband really want a baby, he have baby fever. We both agree on to TTC in 2016
If unplanned pregnancy happen before 2016, we will keep baby at all cost. We both against abortion, we both love babies. But at my age 30, I’m not young anymore. People tell me that the older you are the harder to get pregnant.

I told my husband that I can’t be pregnant because I took the BCP everyday exactly on time. When you taking BCP correctly, you not ovulating an egg, so the chances of get pregnant is none. And we only 3rd month into our marriage so my body still trying to adjust to the BCP; it probably just late again.

My husband want a baby so he happy that I’m late, lol
He be THRILLED if I’m pregnant. When he left to work, he kiss my stomach. He told me take the pregnancy test and when I’m pregnant, he will kiss my stomach EVERYDAY for 9 Months until the baby born.

He making me feel kindda awkward. Kissing my stomach for 9 Months everyday until the baby born, will probably just suffocate his wife and the baby with effections.
We 3 months into marriage and I'm still trying to get used to my husband kiss my butt cheek.
I have an abusive mother in my childhood, and I grow up in a very cold family so I'm not used to affections at all.

I can already tell that he going to be the Dad that will spoil his kids rotten!!
I was raise in a strict traditional Chinese family, so I know I will be very strict to my kids. And him, he the Dad that will spoil his kids. The kids will always run to daddy daddy for everything because daddy spoil them rotten. Arg!!
Before we TTC, I think we need another talk on this. We have the talk before, he said it himself that he will spoil his children.
We probably have cultural clashes on the ways we going to raise our children.

We been through alot of hardship to be together. From my abusive Chinese mother disapproval of him because of his skin color, to our huge cultural difference.
I do want a baby, but not now. I want more of ‘us’ two people time alone together as a couple before we have a baby. I hope I'm not being too selfish. Am I too selfish?

He been working 2 jobs, 12-14 hours everyday so we can have enough money to buy a house as fast as we can. We plan to TTC in 2016 when we have our own house. I want to spend more time with him as two of us before bring in a baby. Is that too SELFISH of me?

Sorry for my bad English grammars, English is my third language.

It's difficult to answer without knowing what pill you are on.

Some pills like the mini pill cancel out periods all together, I was on the mini pill and had no bleeding at all.

Others, you take a seven day break from the pill and that is when you have your period.

The best thing to do is take a pregnancy test. If negative then you know it's just the pill. The pill for me has always been extremely effective, but if you find yours isn't suiting you speak to your doctor about alternatives.

Some contraceptions release the same hormones as some of the pills so would have the same effect. Usually it takes time for your body to get used to it, so it could just be that your body is adjusting to it as you've only been on it a short while.

The MN contraception topic is here

You asked about the effectiveness of the pill, and how it compares to other methods. Here's a table (originally from a contraception textbook) of failure rates: www.contraceptivetechnology.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/CTFailureTable.pdf

Even with perfect use, there is a small failure rate with any type of pill - the 0.3 on the table means for every hundred couples using it for a year, there will be less than one pregnancy. But if you are not pregnant, and want a safer method, the ones to consider are the injection, the implant or the coil (particularly the mirena coil).

I dont know about the pill but acpregnancy test is a good idea.

You need to take a pregnancy test. The pill is very reliable. However it is not 100% effective. It is said to be 99%. So someone has to be in that 1%.

I got pregnant on the pill. It does happen. I now have a lovely daughter. I'm very glad we have her.

It would be good to talk to your husband about your feelings and worries about being smothered by affection. It might be hard for him to understand but he obviously loves you so must want to know if you are worried or unhappy.

It sounds like your childhood was very hard. You are an adult now and you get to make the decisions about your life and your behaviour. There are really good free parenting classes in many areas which you can go to when pregnant or after you have a baby. You can ask a midwife or health visitor about these. These will be helpful if you are worried about being too strict.

Good luck!

The injection is a bad idea if you want to conceive next year as it can effect fertility for many months.
Take a test but you are very unlikely to get pregnant on the pill.

Take folic acid just in case. It's cheap and available from the supermarket or the chemist.
Take a pregnancy test tomorrow morning and again in a week.
The pill isn't 100% effective. It's very good, but medication, tummy upsets etc can affect it. It does take your body a while to get used to and also stress can affect your periods.
I don't recommend the implant or the injection - both are linked to lower bone density - the most effective form of long term, easily reversible contraception is the IUD, either mirena or the copper coil.

It's not selfish at all to want to plan a baby. It's your choice as a couple. 30 isn't too old at all either! :)

Thank you for all helpful and informative advice. Noted, appreciated and will follow all advice.
An thank you "HangingInAGruffaloStance", for being undersstanding.

I do have a hard childhood, both me and my older brother were being abusive by our mother. Both of us have move out away from for more than a decade already. But she still trying to control us, dictating us who we should married.
Throughout my whole childhood I hear she belittle me, put me down ebveryday, verbally/emotionally abusive to. Growing up hearing all these, it take a toll on my self-worth. I feel that I'm not worth it to be love, my self-worth is just low.
To my mom in her eyes, I'm worth less than a dog on the street.

Well I'm 30 now, but subconsciously seem like my abusive childhood still haunt me.
When me and my husband got married. We talk about baby plan, and we both agree to TTC in 2016
We both agree that I take my BCP evereyday on time, and if I happen to get pregnant before 2016 then we will keep the baby at all cost. My husband have a baby feever.

I can already tell our future baby will be spoil, not even born yet and already have daddy kisses everyday.
I don't think I'm pregnant, I don't 'feel' pregnant. I think it just my body trying to get used to the BCP

Thank you for let me know I'm not selfish. Sometimes I do feel like I'm very selfish because I don't want a baby this year.
When we dating my husband work 1 job, now we married he working 2 jobs so we can buy a house. I want to spend more time with him as two of us before bring in a baby. At least I have another year with him alone as a couple.

We been through alot of hardship to be together. My mom dislike him because of his skin color, she tried to break us apart. I know when I choose to married him, my mom will disown me and she already did disown me.
But I have no regrets, he is an awesome husband.

We both went through alot to be together, and now we finally can be together. Only 3 months into marriage and a baby? I hope not that soon. And at my age 30, I heard it unlikely to get pregnant right?
And I don't think we ready for baby, he been working ALOT. And he only 29 years olds, isn't that kindda young to be a father?

I'm Chinese and my husband is Black, so we do have a huge huge cultural difference between us.
And the way he is I can tell that he will spoil his kids rotten. And I'm the one strict to the kids.
Before we TTC, I think we need another talk on how we going to raise our kids. If anyone have any tips on how to raise children, for a couple with huge cultural difference like me and my husband. Please give me some tips, thank you.

You just need to take a pregnancy test really. If you are pregnant, you should stop taking the pill.

Thirty isn't that old to be getting pregnant, fertility does decline with age, but not that dramatically for a few years yet (usually) - and 29 isn't that young to be a father.

Your husband sounds lovely, and so do you. You are very brave for having broken away from your mother's control. The difficult feelings you have are understandable from your childhood. Your doctor could perhaps direct you to some counselling or therapy to help you deal with them and have a happier life.

There is a message board on here under "being a parent" for multicultural families. You might get some ideas and support there.

What children need is love and acceptance from their parents. They need guidance and teaching to help them gradually learn the right behaviour, not punishment (when young) or harsh criticism (ever).

Being a parent can be hard and emotionally draining, but also wonderful, exciting and fascinating.

I think it is harder for people with abusive childhoods to be confident in how they are as a parents, so reading some books or going to parenting classes can be very helpful in supporting you to find your way. Mumsnet is good too!

Just my thoughts.