How would you feel about this?

[Pyjamaramadrama]

Dp has been told he has to work away when I'm 36+4.

He'll be a 4 hour drive away for 4 nights and be in the middle of nowhere unlikely to have much reception at times.

My labour with ds1 was very quick 4-5 hours and this is my second.

I'm scared if I go into labour as dp wouldn't get back in time and I think it's too close to due date.

He's not happy but is under pressure from work, they actually wanted him to go the week after!

How would you feel about this?

It's not ideal I agree. When did you go into labour with Dc1? It's probably unlikely you'll go into labour before 37 weeks but I'd have your Mum or friend on standby to be an emergency birth partner if needed.

Wouldn't bother me, dh went skiing when I was 36 weeks with dc3 and came home injured (because he was being a dick)he regularly works 4/5 hours away. I have sections, so the likely hood of me needing an emcs if I went into early labour would rule him out of being at the birth anyway.

My dp also works about 5 hours away. But we can't afford for him to stay off so we're both just praying hell get time to get home....dd1 was 17 hrs established labour dd2 was 7.52. Hopefully because you'll only be 36+4 you'll have a few weeks before dc is born x

Depends. With my second, had I needed to deliver without him (work/childcare) then I would have been totally fine about it. At that stage it is unlikely (but not improbable) that you will go into labour while he is away.

Can you ask that there is a landline you can have for an emergency? My DH went away at a similar time but only for one night and he found out the landline when he got there. It was an in house training facility not a hotel but there was still a landline I could get him on

I wouldn't be happy but it sounds unavoidable-can you get your mum
Or a friend to come and stay with you? (Unless you have someone nearby). My biggest concern would be childcare for the eldest- whilst my husband would not want to miss the birth (I'm 36 weeks now btw) I think if it came to it I would get through it without him.

Not ideal but if work are being inflexible then it's a difficult situation. They've got no obligation to make sure he is somewhere sensible when you're pregnant.

I'd make back up plans for childcare and support just in case. Maybe there's somewhere near where he will be that has a landline you could call in an emergency?

Thanks for replies. I need some perspective I guess.

There will definitely be no landline available during the day as he literally works in the middle of nowhere. There would be during the night. It's very unlikely he'd get back because of how quick ds1 came.

This is our first dc together so I'd be devastated if he missed the birth and so would he.

He could refuse to go, but they'd have to delay the job and the company want the money, I know it wouldn't be easy for him to say no.

Unlikely I would go into labour at 36+4 but it could happen. Ds was a few days early.

Btw I'm not too worried about childcare/birth partner as I've got both sets of grandparents and other family not too far away. I feel confident I can get through birth without him.

It's just I don't want him to miss the baby's birth. It's not something you can ever get back is it?

He'd asked work ages ago not to give him any far away jobs in the 3-4 week run up and they'd agreed. Now they're getting him to spend 4 nights away!

I've also got a weakened cervix so small risk of early labour, although I've got this far, 34 weeks, so it will probably be fine.

I'm just so sick of his work and their lack of consideration.

They're making him miss ds birthday party because he has to cover for his boss while he goes on a flying lesson.

This week away he'd actually booked leave too which they're making him cancel.

1 in 10 babies are born before 37 weeks, so although it's not common it's not as rare as people think either. I wouldn't be happy but then I had DS at 36 and was in hospital at 35 so my perspective is different. If you're having a problem free pregnancy and usually deliver at term it should be fine. Good luck!

Considering the support you have from relatives it wouldn't bother me that much.

However it's not great the way your Dh seems to be getting messed around by employer.