is it too soon to even think about a second child?

[emzickle]

I have a 19 day old daughter, and my partner and I are wanting to get pregnant again, is that stupid crazy?

We have chatted about waiting until after christmas, and try in January, and if our last attempt at getting PG is any thing to go by - hopefuly it will happen just as quick.

(on christmas morning we decided to try for a baby, and according to dates, baby was concieved on January 4th!)

MKG didn't say that actually it was someone else sorry MKG. It's those mad pg hormones again wipping out brain cells.

i know the ones moominin

Hi emzickle glad to hear that you are enjoying motherhood - I was on the thread when you were having your little girl so it is nice to hear that you are obviously very happy.

A few weeks after child birth I wanted 5 children. I was (and I still am) so in love with my little girl that I thought that it would be the most wonderful thing to have more children. However, nearly 2 years on, I would wait if I were you. You are going to have so much fun with your little one, take your time. Get to know your baby and watch her grow. Enjoy her and make things easy for yourself. Let your body recover and get yourself fit and health ready for the next one. I felt so much better after 6 months (you don't realise at first how much it knocks the stuffing out of you, especially if you are breast feeding). I am sure you and your dp will do whatever is right for you all - good luck

i would probs wait til at least the middle of feb/march time to start trying. by then the baby wil be wanting lots more of your attention and you might feel differently.

I had ds2 when ds1 was 1 year and two weeks. It was incredibly hard although it's much easier now (ds2 is one tomorrow) and in many ways I'm so glad we've got it all over with. However, their routines were so different but both of them needed me all the time. My second preg was pants and I really feel like I missed out on most of ds1's first year because I was ill/in pain/felt sh*te when preg with ds2.

I think you should do what you think is best for you and your family. I had dc3 when dc2 was 16m and then had dc4 when dc3 was 15m. Dc1 was 5 when dc4 was born. But then I liked being pg, liked giving birth and liked having babies/children. Hard work at times but it's what we wanted and felt the rewards were worth it. If you feel fit enough and prepared for the hard work it brings then why not?

ds1 was 4 months when ds2 was conceived!
.....and i wouldnt change it for the world.
although birth was much more painful and harder the 2nd time.
i think maybe my body was a bit peed off by the whole thing!!

oh, and if you do have them close (mine are 14m apart) be prepared for the negative attitudes.
'was it an accident?'
'you will have your hands full'

at the thought of sex when baby is only 19 days old! Or was it just me????

The adrenalin rush that comes after having a baby makes some of us (ahem) frisky . Soon wears off though...

Glad you are enjoying it emzickle but your body REALLY needs time to recover, and you should enjoy and focus on baby number 1 for a while. Congratulations.

I too thought I would never have sex again for quite afew weeks after DD was born.

She is now 4.5 months, and I am 9 wks pregnant. Didn't exactly plan it like this, but am over the moon about havng another one now! Know it will be hard work, but then having kids always is!

I was a little worried at first at what people would think about such a small gap - but the few people I have told have been really supportive - no negative comments yet! (having said that, am going back to work next month, and not looking forward to telling them it won't be for too long!)

I think its a personal decision about when to have another baby, different for everyone.

i have 14 mths between mine and it is the best thing we did, they are great pals now of 3 and 4.

i got serious "i need another baby" feelings when ds was 3 mths, i think it is hormonal, but a kinda primieval feeling too, if that makes sense!

it would have been lovely to have local support but my nearest relative is 250 miles away! you can just do what you think is right for your little family unit.

good luck emzickle!

i am currently preg with second child, fell when DS was about 5 months. at the time i was excited, because i found looking after DS was easy and fun! until he hit 6 months. weaning has been a nightmare, he wont sleep through the night anymore, and whats to be attached to my hip permently. when your lent over a toilet seat at 5 in the morning with the baby screaming upstairs you will wonder "why the hell did i think this was a good idea!!!"
WAIT. is all i can say, pregnancy is hard enough without a young baby attached to you!

Hiya, just want to say its a totally personal choice, I have 22 months between my 2 dds and imo its a perfect gap, they are now 3 and nearly 5, and are the best of friends, they do everything together, its so lovely, as there is a 12 year age gap between me and my only sis, we weren't that close. I am now pregnant with my 3rd and last!! baby, and i am so happy my girls have got each other!
Anyway as i said personal descision, it may be very hard for the first couple of years, but they will be best of friends good luck with what ever you decide to do! xx xx

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Sorry but just because you have 2 children close together doesnt mean that they will be best of friends. There is 14 months between my sister and I, we fought like cat and dog all the way through childhood and barely speak some 25 years later.. they might be best friends... but it has more to do with their personalites than the age difference..

I think, yes it's your decision but please don'e ever underestimate how hard it is to parent two babies at once.
If you are going to do it, do it with your eyes wide open.
It's not a lovely fairytale, it's bloody hard work.

yes, there is no denying it is hard work but the bonus of being preggers with a young baby are that they are hopefully still in "sleeps in the daytime" stage which is invaluable for when you need to put your feet up!

also, as my ds was 14 mths when dd came along, their was no issue of jealousy as he seemed too young to take any notice of her!

when the 2nd baby comes, if you are lucky, they can both share a similar routine, regarding naps, bedtimes etc..

it does, of course, very much depend on the babies, their personalities and how obliging they are!

like other posters have said, each to their own, horses for courses etc. whatever you choose, good luck, and enjoy being a mum to babies - before you know it, they will be at school!!!!

My mum is a psychotherapist and says that when you become pregnant your whole world becomes focused on the baby growing within you and may become your main priority rather your newborn. There are 10 months between my mum and her younger sister and my mum says she feels like she missed out by not having that special bonding time with her mum where she was the main focus.

The way I'm feeling right now I'm not sure I can face it ever again let alone staight after this one is born!

my friend got pg with triplets when her dc1 was 4 months old and they were born at 36 weeks gesttation. all four very happy healthy and adorable . go for it - if nature allows then its as nature intended!