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Original poster

? referall to social care

9 replies

NtB99 · 03/04/2015 14:40

Hi this is my first post after weeks of watching from afar. So heres my question
In 2012 i was in a domeatic violence relationship social care became involved ( i have 2 children with him ) they were put on child protection plans to make sure i stayed away from him because they thought i was vunerable... i did and finally after 2 years of hell they.closed the case in feb 2014 never heard from them since. Im now pregnant as a result of a short fling i made the descision to raise this baby on my own .. at my booking appt last week she mentionesd referring me to the safegaurding midwife i dont understand why... is she going to get social care involved ?? Im so confused i desperatley want this baby but would rather terminate than have social care back in our lives again !! Tia

OP posts:
Original poster
NtB99 · 03/04/2015 15:28

Please some one help !!

OP posts:
NobbyNobs · 03/04/2015 15:34

It'll be to make sure the baby isn't a product of an abusive relationship, either from your previous partner being back on the scene or a new partner. It's to protect all of your children and you.

RedRugNoniMouldiesEtc · 03/04/2015 15:36

I guess they have to when a new pg happens with historical involvement. I suspect social care will want reassurance that this dc is not with your ex and that you have continued to stay away from him? Sorry I can't be more help though. Was the process really so bad last time? I've had involvement but was lucky enough that it was low level and very supportive, I know not everyone has that experience with them Sad

Original poster
NtB99 · 03/04/2015 15:44

Yea nearly caused me 2 have a breakdown i ended up off work with stress it was the single worst experience of life and i am not prepared to go back there... do you think social care will get involved then.. midwife only mentioned ref it to safegaurding midwife and how will i no if social care is getting involved do they have to contact you within a certain time any info will be helpful Confused

OP posts:
Grainwhole · 03/04/2015 22:10

My goodness, you poor thing! I don't have any personal experience in this but from the bit of knowledge I've picked up I can't imagine they'd want to dedicate the resources to your case as it stands - with no man on the scene at all and no contact with the violent one for years(?) current children doing well etc - it's absolutely worlds apart from when they were heavily (and I'm sorry to hear, horribly,) involved last time.

Big hug and my advice would be to call midwife and ask questions/ tell her about your concerns. I bet she'll be able to reassure you. X

Lucy61 · 03/04/2015 22:18

Was the baby a result of a 'short fli g' with the violent ex? Or someone else?

RedRugNoniMouldiesEtc · 03/04/2015 22:38

I honestly don't know, I have no experience of that part of the system. Hopefully someone with some will come along. Sounds like you have been through a dreadful time though, I wish I had something to suggest to help!

mumsrthebest · 03/04/2015 23:10

I have worked for Children's Services for 10 years so have knowledge of this. I think you will find it will just be a precaution and that they need to check that you are not with your previous partner or if your new partner is abusive. I would imagine that if you aren't with your ex it shouldn't be a problem and if there are no concerns with the father to your unborn and your other children are ok at home and at school there will be no problems. They could possibly do internal checks ie: Children's Services database to see if he is known for any offences relating to children. They may do agency checks to nursery, school or health visitor to see if there are any issues. If everything is fine then no further action will be taken. I hope I have helped, try not to worry. Xx

lougle · 04/04/2015 00:04

The safeguarding midwife will just chat through the situation with you. She'd only refer on if she felt it was necessary and she'd tell you.

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