Announcement and with sad family news?

[dottiemad]

Hi all,

Just wanted your opinion on this..

I was planning on telling my mum and dad about our pregnancy tomorrow but we have had recent news (last week)that my uncle has cancer of the liver and has months rather than years left....

I don't know whether I should announce or not? I was only going to tell my mum and dad as I am only 6+4....what do you think?

What's your relationship with the uncle like? I would consider telling him first...unconventional I know but that was my gut reaction on reading your post. I know it's early but hopefully he will appreciate the discretion.

Really sorry for everything you're going through

Thank you all, I'm Ok. I am upset about it but he is in his mid-70s. Its my dad I feel for to be honest. I wouldn't say we were close enough to tell him first, I just did know if I was being insensitive by blurting out our news...

So you've all known since last week that your uncle is terminally ill (sorry for that, how awful :( )?

Then I would say that enough time has passed for your news to not seem insensitive, so long as you and your parents/ father have already had some kind of conversation about how sad it is re. your uncle. I think under those circumstances you can tell them the good news without it seeming dismissive of the sad news.

If though, you haven't yet spoken to them about your uncle, then I'd do that first, and then maybe hold fire for a little longer to tell them about the baby (congratulations! )

Tell them.
There is an old saying 'the Lord giveth and The Lord taketh away'.

Everyone will be pleased with your news.

Tell them.

I found out I was pregnant with DC1 the week after my father died. It was very welcome, distracting, happy news.

Thanks everyone, thank you for your support x

I'd tell them, or possibly wait a few more days or a week if they are quite gripped by your uncle's news. Sorry to hear about your uncle.

It's a different situation but I found out I was pregnant the day my sil found out that she was miscarrying her baby. I waited another three weeks before I told the parents It felt so insensitive but they were made up to have good news, albeit that I've asked them not to tell anyone else for a while Out of respect to sil, gave them something positive to think about

I guess it depends how you think they would take it if you (very sadly, and I hope this never happens to you) lost your baby as you are still very early. I had a mmc at 11 wks last year and my mum (and dad) were obviously devastated for me, I had told them early. This time around (I'm pregnant again) I didn't tell them until the scan as they had just received bad news and although I was desperate to tell them as it would cheer them up I knew it would make them feel worse if they then found out I'd lost another baby. Just offering a different perspective. I'm sorry to hear your news, and also congratulations I wish you a healthy pregnancy.

I told my parents quite early (7 weeks) cos I couldn't keep it in. They were going through similar things with a family member dying and were quite stressed at the time. I kind of wish I hadnt because I think it made them worry until they were "allowed" to spread the good news after 12 weeks. I would have wanted them to know if anything went wrong though, so that was my justification behind it. So it really depends on you and your relationship with them!

I'm sorry about your uncle.msuch sad news.

With dc1 we were told on the phone by a midwife we were probably going to lose the baby so to go hospital for a scrape. I didn't go, I got a scan and the. We went and told my nana and pil. I was just over eight weeks and. We told beofre the planned 12 weeks as wanted them to have the enjoyment of the baby coming if I did lose him. He is fourteen now. With dc3 I was six months when told my nana had 3-12 months. I told her the sex and name just in case. She died ten weeks later. I was pleased I had told her.

As long as you acknowledge your fathers future loss I think fine to tell them when you want.

Sorry about your uncle. shortly after our lovely dad got a cancer diagnosis with poor prognosis, my brother and his wife announced that they were having a baby, the news was a lovely distraction and it was nice that dad got to share their news and happiness. I dont think it is insensitive to share your news And perhaps your parents would feel awful if they thought you couldn't say. hope all goes well whatever you decide to do. X

Well, My parents came to visit and we chatted about my uncle for a while and had some food, over cake I announced and honestly they couldnt have been happier. I said that I didnt know whether or not to say anything due to uncle but they just said it was separate and that they were so happy.

Thank you foe your support everyone, emotional weekend xxx

Oh I'm so glad it went well for you, and I bet it was emotional all round. Glad they've got some happy news to offset the sadder news.