Gender preferance

[lilyanna812]

I was watching a tv show about gender disappointment and reading through blogs/forums regarding the topic and I am finding that more people seem to want girls.

There is seems to be big bias against boys and I am wondering why that is?

I have DS1 and DS2 and currently expecting my third, and I get a lot of 'hoping for a girl this time?; 'if you are very lucky it will be a girl'; 'third time lucky'...

Havent really thought about gender (my main focus is getting through this pregnancy).....but I am starting to think, if I have a boy people will think I am bitterly disappointed and if I have a girl, then all my dreams have been fulfilled

anyone else having this gender crisis?

I am thinking I would like DS3

I'm surprised o hear more ppl prefer girls, I always thought its the opposite! I always pictured myself with a boy too (maybe cause my lil bro was born when I was 15 and I'm used to handle a boy), but I'm having a girl. Was quite a shock at the beginning but getting used to the thought now (hope she won't like pink and everything princessy) ;)

Well, depends where you're looking. In massive chunks if the world, across -Asia and Africa - think of how many countries that involves - there is an openly articulated preference for boys.

In the country I come from, boys are so highly preferred over girls, that sex determination during oregnancy scans is a criminal offence. It stil happens under covers, and horrifically female foetuses are often aborted. It's a country where women are married off with dowry, there is severe abuse of women and rape is rampant. In that country I was raised in a family where the girl child was not only desired but raised to become achievers and really really ambitious.

I am pregnant and would love my child irrespective of their sex. But yes, coming from an Asian country where the male child is GOD, and knowing that large swathes of the world continue to prefer male children, I do really want a girl and maybe I will get one maybe I won't.

I am one of 4 girls and love my sisters to bits, so with my first I secretly hoped for a girl. He was a boy, and to me of course, he's better than any girl I know, so I'm happy that he is who he is.
I think many women want girls and men want boys, as they want someone who'll be a close friend as an adult.
Now I'm expecting no.2 I have no preference.

I think there's more preference for boys too but maybe it's how we interpret it.

I have 2 daughters so the posts from people wanting boys stand out to me more as they make me more defensive of my girls whereas I tend to skim past the girl preference ones.

Regarding comments you get them either way, I had people including a midwife during labour ask me if I was going to try for a boy. I even had one person say my husband must be disappointed!

Its a bit of a strange one for me, I would love a boy, partner wants a girl. Girls make me think clingy, whilst boys don't need their mums after a certain age. Not that I don't want a close relationship, just don't want my child to feel 'duty bound' to their parents. The whole son/wife daughter/life thing plays through my mind. Regardless of gender, I'll love this kid and hope it grows up to be independent .

Gender or sex?

You can influence gender stereotypes a reasonable amount by your parenting. Though I suppose your own ideas about gender are the roots of any preference on the sex of a baby.

I wasn't bothered what sex dc1 was but it was a dd. Now I'm pregnant with dc2 I'd like another dd. I think a sibling of the same sex is great so if dd had of been ds I'd probably be hoping for ds2 now.

Obviously l will love dc2 whatever they are!

Who cares what other people think!!!

And it's sex you're talking about not gender!

I think part of it is that there's a general assumption that people want a 'balanced' family with equal numbers of boys and girls, so families with 2 of one sex already will run into the "you must want one of the other sex now" attitude regardless of whether they have 2 boys or 2 girls.

I also think that as a general rule, women tend to have a preference for girls and men tend to have a preference for boys (and yes, I know there's exceptions to this and that gender preferences can be mild).

So I think that if you're reading threads about gender preferences on a site that's mostly used by women, such as mumsnet, you're likely to get a distorted perspective about gender preferences that's skewed in favour of girls.

Hi lillyanna
I am in the same boat, I have two gorgeous boys who I love so much, am pregnant with 3rd child and I swear if one more idiot person says to me 'are you hoping for a girl' I will punch them be very rude back! It especially annoys me when they say it in front of my boys!! How insensitive!!
I totally understand and I feel the same, if I have a boy people will assume I'm disappointed, which is totally not the case, or worse, they'll actually say something like 'ah, shame you didn't have a girl this time'.
I'm only 15 weeks and it's driving me mad already!! xx

"I have 2 daughters so the posts from people wanting boys stand out to me more as they make me more defensive of my girls whereas I tend to skim past the girl preference ones. "

I really think this is sooo true......this really hit home for me. I think I am highly sensitive to comments about boys, that maybe subconsciously I am looking for comments to confirm my theory, even if they are not true.

fixuplooksharp....good luck with your pregnancy, boy or girl, I really hope people will put a sock in it.

My in laws really want a grand daughter.........which makes me long for a DS.

If I was left alone then I wouldn't be too bothered which gender I got....but with people having preferences, the rebel in me coming out

I do wanted a girl and dd is now 9 months old! Dh wanted a girl too, Secretly hoping no 2 will also be a girl, although DH wants a boy next. We will just have to see what we get of course, I am happy either way really I just couldn't imagine myself with two boys

Gender and sex is not the same thing!

allotherusernamesaretaken

I just cannot imagine myself with girls. I wouldn't know what to do :( and I am not really a girly girl, so fingers crossed its a boy :)

My sister is the same and she has 3 ds!