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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

scan tomorrow will probably be alone

22 replies

iniquity · 22/02/2015 15:36

My dh and i have been arguing today about money today.
I doubt he will come with me tomorrow for the scan at 12 weeks.
Do you think I'll be OK on my own? I suppose it depends if its good news or not.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

AuntieDee · 22/02/2015 15:38

Just tell him that despite your row, you want him there. He will regret it forever if he doesn't go...

HoggleHoggle · 22/02/2015 15:40

Why on earth would he not go just because of a row?

You will be ok by yourself but the fact is you shouldn't have to be.

Congrats, and hope you enjoy seeing your little one tomorrow.

sebsmummy1 · 22/02/2015 15:42

I had bad news at my 12 week on Thursday and whilst I would have dealt with it ok on my own (I was numb with shock so no tears) I was grateful my DP was there to drive me home at least.

PotteringAlong · 22/02/2015 15:43

Never go to bed angry. Tomorrow is a whole new day...

nemo81 · 22/02/2015 15:52

Chances are you'll be fine. I'm going to my 12 week scan alone tomorrow. I Always go alone as dp looks after the young ones, we have no outside help at all.

Original poster

iniquity · 22/02/2015 15:58

I'm sorry to hear that sebsmummy. He can't drive so I'll be driving myself back either way. He isn't very nice to me lately so he might not be a comfort if it is bad news.

OP posts:

Rebecca1608 · 22/02/2015 16:00

My OH just about came to my 12 week scan as he wasn't really that keen on keeping them in the first place as we hadn't been trying, money worries, not the right time etc apparently. He DID come & he cried lol. He said it was the best experience ever.
Although you're not in exactly the same position as me. I agreed with the other people ^ it is important he comes despite the row. He'll really regret it if he doesn't go.

madwomanbackintheattic · 22/02/2015 16:02

Then rather than just considering your scan (which is a teeny tiny part of the entire pregnancy/ labour/ raising child to adulthood picture) you should be considering his future role as a partner instead.

The scan may be your next immediate point of concern, but your issue is a whole lot bigger than that.

madwomanbackintheattic · 22/02/2015 16:05

(Plenty of people do scans alone - husbands can't get off work, work o'seas etc etc. That's a drop in the ocean. Being 12 weeks pg with martial difficulties? You may want to concentrate on that. Plenty of people do pg alone, and raise children alone. It's sometimes easier than trying to do it with a partner who is 'not very nice to me'. Such life events can bring out the worst in some folk.)

Misty414 · 22/02/2015 17:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

iniquity · 22/02/2015 17:31

He was really supportive during the first pregnancy. I suppose I was just expecting the same this time round especially as he wanted this one.
He's not talking to me ATM so it does look like a scan alone for me tomorrow.
Thanks for the responses ladies I'm sure I'll manage

OP posts:

GotToBeInItToWinIt · 22/02/2015 17:41

Agree that you have bigger issues than a scan. Is he going to be supportive for the rest of your pregnancy? With a newborn?

sianihedgehog · 22/02/2015 18:40

I went to mine alone as my other half had a work crisis, and had been at a 10 week private scan already. I also went to an emergency 6 week scan alone. Both times were fine, and I only got positive news. My other half was with me when I got bad news at a scan in my previous pregnancy. I'm glad I didn't have to tell him. But, and I know people will think I sound cold for this, I could have handled it alone. I spent most of the time there trying to cheer him up, and felt like I couldn't let any of the sadness out for a few days anyways.
OP you can totally handle going alone and it's him who will regret it if he doesn't go.

AnnieMorel · 22/02/2015 18:45

Not talking to you? Tell him to grow up & support you.

HoggleHoggle · 22/02/2015 19:01

iniquity I can't believe you think he would let you go alone, it's as though he would be using it to punish you and that's awful. Fair enough if a man can't make it for a reason but withholding his presence because of a row isn't on.

I hope he sorts himself out and all goes well.

Littlehopeful · 22/02/2015 19:15

I think he will come around and if he doesn't tell him to grow up. I'm sure you scan will be fine though and I'm wishing you the best of luck x

MsDeedles · 22/02/2015 19:23

I went to my 12 week appointment alone. Wasn't really sure what it involved (or frankly if there would be a scan). I can see that it would be horrid to have to tell bad news but I would be more worried about the 20 week anomaly scan. You will be fine

StoneBaby · 22/02/2015 20:13

I had my 12 w scan alone as DH had to do the school run. It was all fine but I was worried how I would cope if...

littlesupersparks · 22/02/2015 20:30

I went to my 12 week scan alone as my friend who was going to look after the boys had an ectopic pregnancy diagnosed so my husband stayed at home with the boys. It was all good news but I did find out I was having twins so still a big shock!!! The midwives and sonographer were very supportive and looked after me.

Original poster

iniquity · 22/02/2015 21:17

I will let you guys know tomorrow so I don't feel so alone.
If he doesn't come I won't tell him what they said.

OP posts:

HoggleHoggle · 23/02/2015 16:31

Hope all went well today

Original poster

iniquity · 23/02/2015 22:00

Yes it did I think. The sonographer couldn't get a good look because I'm fat according to my notes. I'm a size 12 with a jelly belly but a normal bmi.
He came but we fell out again because I asked if we could get a refund on scan pics if there was no baby. Apparently that is not a normal question.
We didn't get any photos in the end. But there was no obvious problems and I'm grateful for that.
Thanks everyone that responded.

OP posts:

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