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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

I think I might be - if I am, it's a disaster

80 replies

QueenEvil · 22/10/2006 20:49

I am 2 days late.

I am never, never, ever late.

Did preg test last night - but neg (have tested neg previously when preg with ds4).

If I am, I don't want it.

I have 5 kids already, don't want and can't cope with the thought of another.

Shit shit shit.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

DumbledoresGirl · 22/10/2006 21:10

Well, you would think so Jaimjams, but you would be amazed how many people came out of the woodwork when I was having my crisis and told me about babies they knew of who had been conceived by fathers with vasectomies!

Original poster

QueenEvil · 22/10/2006 21:10

Miss Peck, I think it doesn't interfere with your natural cycle at all as there is no hormone. I'm 36 btw.

Haha DG - thank you for reminding that I'm getting to be an old crone (takes one to know one)

dh has refused point blank to be sterilised. I am not entirely happy to be sterilised either as I'm not too keen on anything that interferes with the natural way of things but......in this situation I am most definitely giving it serious consideration.

Every time I go to the toilet I am praying my period has started.

OP posts:

DumbledoresGirl · 22/10/2006 21:13

Try to relax QE (I know, stupid thing to say) but I was going to the loo, longing for the blood to appear too and in the end I was 6 days late. I mean, for me, that is ridiculous! I am sure the little bugger held off just because I was worrying so much about it.

(Oh and you are not that old BTW so ignore my coomment about a certain age!)

mears · 22/10/2006 21:13

QE - the reason I opted to get sterilised is that women end their natural fertility in their forties - men are fertile till they die! If something happened to me my DH might meet a younger partner and opt to have a new family (he says 'no way'). If something happened to DH and I met a new partner I would be too old for a new family whether I wanted one or not.

expatinscotland · 22/10/2006 21:13

My dad, BIL and FIL NEVER fathered any more children.

But they also were stringent about contraception until they got the all-clear letter.

It is permanent, and shouldn't be done w/an eye to reversal.

They all thought it was a piece of piss compared to what their wives went through - like my sister's crash csection after 20 hours of labour.

expatinscotland · 22/10/2006 21:16

On the other hand, as my BIL put it, he knew damn well he never wanted to father any more kids, and at 35, he felt he was old enough to make such a decision about his body.

When asked, 'What if you meet a younger partner', he responded that she'd either have to be done childbearing or not want any, b/c he truly never wanted to father any more kids for any reason.

He's not the sort who lives for some hypothetical future that may or may not happen, though.

It depends on the person.

But in defense of men, honestly, not all of them are going to want another family just b/c they have a new partner, and it's not fair to treat them as if they were. They're capable of deciding that for themselves and their own bodies just as women are.

Jimjams2 · 22/10/2006 21:16

oh my cousin was conceived post vasectomy as well DG, but statistically it is the method least likely to fail- it's something like 100 times more effectiive than the pill and I think 2 to 4 times more effective than female sterilisation. You need to get the all clear, but for us it was very important that we didn't have another. If I die/we split dh thinks he has enough responsibility as it is (esp as ds1 will always be a dependent). The pre-snip chat/counselling we had was pretty good.

Original poster

QueenEvil · 22/10/2006 21:18

I agree totally mears. I know for sure I do not want any more ever. This scare (please, please let it be a scare) has confirmed that.

I wouldn't expect dh to have a sterilisation op. same reasons mears has stated.

My boobs are slightly tender which could mean either preg or period due so that's nothing to go by. Felt very sick the other day when eating egg but that is normal, I always feel like that. No other symptoms.

OP posts:

DumbledoresGirl · 22/10/2006 21:19

My dh is the same. He said that if I died and he met another woman, he still would not want more children as we have 4 - I shouldn't think this hypothetical woman would want any of her own after she had met my 4 either!

Original poster

QueenEvil · 22/10/2006 21:21

Are all preg tests as reliable as one another?

I wanted clearblue but dh wouldn't pay the money out and bought a cheaper tesco own brand with 2 tests. When I was preg with ds4 a cheaper brand came up negative 4 times.

I'm going to use the other test 2moro - or should I wait longer? Am working in the morning so can't call FP clinic til afternoon.

OP posts:

mears · 22/10/2006 21:22

What I was trying to demonstrate was the natural cycle thing QE mentioned. I didn't mean pregnancies during the vasectomy interval.
I agree Expat that men need to be able to make their own decisions but until you are in a situation you don't know how you will feel. I have seen many new couples who have had sterilisation reversed because of new relationships.
I also remember vividly a couple where the DH was in his late forties with a grown family and he married a 20 year old years after the death of his first wife following a brain tumour.
You just can't predict the future.
That is also why I said it is a personal decision - as you know from previous threads on sterilisation I don't agree with male sterilisation. My DH would have gone but I wouldn't let him.

MissPecksniff · 22/10/2006 21:23

DG, that's exactly what my friends said too.

(it' mercy, I need a new name but I don't like this temp one. dh has decided to join MN fgs)

mears · 22/10/2006 21:24

I would wait a couple of days QE if you can. Tests nowadays are usually reliable - whatever the make.

Original poster

QueenEvil · 22/10/2006 21:24

My father was sterilised after my younger db was born. 2o years later he was divorced and remarried. Had to have the reversal op privately and he now has a 14 yo ds.

OP posts:

Original poster

QueenEvil · 22/10/2006 21:26

Will try to hold on another couple days then mears thanks.

If I were to have scan at the FPC to check the position of my coil - would they be able to tell if I were preg?

OP posts:

expatinscotland · 22/10/2006 21:26

And I ran into plenty of women who wanted their tubals reversed.

I find these men who refuse to be sterilised after their wives had so many kids a bit selfish and bullheaded, tbh.

mears · 22/10/2006 21:32

Unlikely - it would be too soon to be sure.

Original poster

QueenEvil · 22/10/2006 21:32

Am off to bed as I am working in the morning.

Will update asap.

Thanks for the input you guys (weak)

OP posts:

mears · 22/10/2006 21:34

I agree Expat, if the woman does not want to be sterilised. I don't think either partner should feel 'forced'. I always knew that is what I would do and DH didn't mind either way.

expatinscotland · 22/10/2006 21:34

Good luck, QE!

Try to keep positive - coils are so effective, the odds are you aren't pregnant.

DumbledoresGirl · 22/10/2006 21:35

Would the scan be safe for the baby if there was one there?

Original poster

QueenEvil · 22/10/2006 21:37

DG - as awful as it is...I would want to terminate as early as possible. Oh shit, I wouldn't WANT to but I couldn't have another, we wouldn't cope.

OP posts:

expatinscotland · 22/10/2006 21:37

There is quite an increased chance for miscarriage w/a coil in place, DG, but there are plenty of instances in which the pregnancy proceeds normally.

Whilst I was working at the women's clinic, we had one patient who got pregnant w/a coil in place.

They could not find the thing w/ultrasound.

It was found in the placenta after the baby was delivered - healthy and well.

Original poster

QueenEvil · 23/10/2006 07:09

Still no period

OP posts:

AlfredAitchcock · 23/10/2006 21:42

how are you doing today?

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