Lifting Toddler

[LooksLikeImStuckHere]

I'm 4 weeks pregnant with DC2 and I feel awful as I'm trying to avoid picking up DS (3) because I'm so paranoid about a miscarriage or something happening to the baby.

There is a family history of mc but I've never experienced one.

DS is ill and he was crying today, asking to be picked up and I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

I'm being PSB (precious second born) aren't I...

Erm yes! Pick up your sick child!

I'm 39 weeks and still picking up my 3yo. Up until a week ago I was also mucking out stables and hefting about bales of straw and hay, but due to worsening SPD I've had to downgrade my horse activities a bit. I had a miscarriage previous to this pregnancy, but it has in no way affected how I have gone about this one.

Honestly, unless you have some sort of mobility issue in which you've previously struggled to pick up your son, you just need to keep going. How else do you expect to do simple things like lift him in and out of his car seat?

Maybe speak to your midwife?I have a heavy toddler and I have miscarried before now (before I had my first).

It's never stopped me lifting toddler and I'm now heavily pregnant. Can't count the amount of times I've had to lift him up and down today and I even have a worry of paralysis, I was previously paralysed and fine now but sometimes worry if picking him up could damage my spinal cord again. Your toddler still needs you and you will still need to pick him up.
You sound anxious.. Maybe talk to your midwife if you can?

It absolutely 100% will not cause miscarriage.
The worst that might happen is later on when your muscles are all stretchy you could strain or sprain yourself if you did it carelessly.

Yes a little bit PSB . Pick the poor thing up! I'm 19 weeks and haven't stopped picking DD up, just be careful and lift from your knees so you don't damage your back.

Congratulations

if picking up toddlers caused m/c how on earth do you think anyone has more than one child? tbh, you are being ridiculous, and you need to cop yourself on because you have months and months left. Just get on with your life as normal.

The reason you shouldn't lift things in pg isn't miscarriage - it's because you're more likely to injure yourself! And that's unlikely at 4 weeks. Enjoy some lovely toddler cuddles :)

It's hard not to be worried at this stage but your body is used to picking up your toddler and it's not an unusual strain defo won't cause miscarriage ask your midwife or gp they will reassure you!!

You'll be ok. Like other people have said, everyone with more than one child has picked up their toddler while pregnant. You're more likely to hurt your back than cause a miscarriage. Not that I'm making light of back pain- I pulled my back picking up DS last summer, it was horrible I could barely walk for a couple of days.

I think you just have to be careful to lift carefully, don't stoop, twist etc. If it feels like you're overdoing it, you probably are. Use your knees. If toddler is tantruming/ wriggling/fighting to avoid being picked up it's probably best not to unless there is imminent danger. Perhaps if toddler needs a cuddle sit down and encourage him to sit on your lap rather than be carried.

I am anxious. I never would have worried before but DS has suffered recurrent mc in the last year. I probably did too much googling...

Thank you for the reality checks (some more gentle than others ).

To be fair, he really isn't that ill, it's a small dose of man flu If he was properly ill then of course I would have picked him up.

DSis, not DS Bloody hell the baby brain has started early!

If you want to read something reassuring and fact based, the miscarriage association has info on the causes of miscarriage. Whilst sadly it's a fact they do happen, there are virtually no everyday activities that cause them: it's usually a genetic accident or with rmc can be an undiagnosed condition (as you already have a child this is less likely too). Another good science based book is "Miscarriage What Every Woman Should Know" by Lesley Regan.

Thank you Squizita, I really appreciate it.