No heartbeat on scan

[milkandchalk]

We're devastated. Scan showed baby measuring 9 weeks but no heartbeat. Never seen my husband quite so upset and wondering just how we're going to cope with this.

Any advice is welcome. xx

I'm so sorry that you have had to experience this. I cannot offer you helpful advice on how to get through this but couldn't read and run.

I don't have any advice other than to look after yourself buying just wanted to say I'm so sorry for your loss

I'm so sorry for your loss. I had the same experience last year and its truly heartbreaking. I found lots of advice on the miscarriage threads. There will be some hard decisions for you to make and it will take strength for you & your husband to refocus. But I promise the heartbreak does get easier over time. Take care of yourself x

I'm so sorry to hear this. Like another said, you'll find a lot of support and advice on the miscarriage threads. I know how you feel. I do hope you'll feel ok soon but do check out the miscarriage threads and I'm sure the ladies on there will be lovely. Hugs xx

So sorry to hear this ... The most important thing right now is that you are both open about your feelings, and reassure him that you are both affected and that he doesn't need to be strong for you when he is grieving too! Talk over how you would like to remember little one ... will you give him/her a name, mark the date in some way etc ... If you are on Facebook please look up Little Baby and Co ... I admin for the page and we can send you a pack with some little items for you in memory of your baby X

So sorry :( I'm not sure what to say except sorry for your loss and make sure you look after yourself it's a tough time you're going through

the only advice i can give you from my previous late miscarriage at 14weeks 5days is to be together keep strong dont let it pull you apart talk about your grief love each other thats the only advise i have for you your in my thoughts hunnie

Very sorry for your loss. The same thing happened to me in July 2013 at 8 weeks. It took me really until what would've been my due date in February last year to totally get over it. It was very hard not to keep thinking about what stage I would've been at. I was quite depressed during that time, at 39 I knew that my chances of conceiving again were slim. I felt that my body had let me down. My partner and I kept talking and I didn't bottle up my feelings. That's my main advice, keep talking to each other. Book a nice holiday, preferably one you couldn't go on if pregnant. We had a lovely week somewhere quite remote, surrounded by beautiful rugged scenery, it was very healing. Mark it if you need to, I didn't as although devastated, at 8.5 weeks it had barely seemed real, and not quite the same as a late loss (everyone is different though).

Anyway, 3 weeks after what should have been my due date I conceived my beautiful daughter, who is now 10 weeks old and perfect. I really hope you have a similarly happy ending.

Oh and check out the miscarriage threads in Body & Soul, they helped me a lot. Although after a certain point I had to stop reading them as they made me feel very pessimistic about ever having a successful pregnancy.

So sorry to hear you are going through this. I have been through this twice and know how devasting it is...my advice is that to take one day at a time. Let yourself grieve - you will both feel quite raw for a while but make sure you share your feelings with each other and take care of each other. you will get through it.

I chose to have an ERPC the first time and I MC naturally the second time. I think the ERPC was the right choice for me the first time but miscarrying naturally wasn't too bad and I could do it at home - something about going through it helped me come to terms with it better IYSWIM.

I can promise you that it does get better - I was desperate to try again and we started as soon as we could. I am now 34 weeks - a miscarriage doesn't have to mean you are at the end of the road. I still think about the ones I have lost but it doesn't hurt like it did. Go onto the miscarriage boards - you will get tremendous support there.

Take care of yourself and I am so sorry