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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Consultant said 'him'

16 replies

upallnight2015 · 04/02/2015 12:15

Hi, am 38 weeks today, with first baby, booked in for ELCS next week (breech). We decided not to find out gender. The consultant has said 'the baby' at scans all the way through, but he said 'he' or 'him' at some point during our last appointment! I can't stop thinking about it! ( this is just for fun- I'm bored on leave now!) what do you think- is he more automatic to say than her, or has consultant given us a clue by accident Smile

OP posts:
Whatsonemore · 04/02/2015 12:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Littleturkish · 04/02/2015 12:18

I think many consultants use 'him' as a general references- when I saw my consultant he warned me he might say 'him' but it didn't mean anything. He was trained in Europe, and said that in his training, they taught them to use him and it was force of habit.

When he then scanned me, he didn't say him at all! And THEREFORE, I think it was a girl. Bit of a leap, but there you go!

meerschweinchen · 04/02/2015 12:19

A sonographer did this to me at a scan I had at about 36 weeks. I had a boy...Smile

wetbehindtheears · 04/02/2015 12:21

Somebody in the room who watched my baby being born referred to the baby as him before I'd even had a chance to see what we had.

She was a girl!

carbolicsoaprocked · 04/02/2015 12:22

I don't know whether we're having a boy or girl but most of the time I say 'him' or 'he'. Occasionally I say 'she' but not often. Don't know why. I suspect the doctor has been told off at some point for saying 'it' and saying 'the baby' every time must get quite onerous! Good luck for next week!

InfinitySeven · 04/02/2015 12:23

It's standard - male words are used both for males and for genders unknown.

I wouldn't read anything into it.

comeagainforbigfudge · 04/02/2015 12:23

My partner says him all the time. We haven't found out the sex.

He says it automatically, so might just be because your consultant is a man. And they all want boys or it seems that way to me

SmileAndNod · 04/02/2015 12:28

A midwife sonographer said this too me as well with dc3 the day before the birth - the little lad is causing a bit of trouble she said. I immediately phoned dh really upset as we didn't want to know the sex. I was convinced it was a boy so took it as confirmation, though I was disappointed that the 'moment' of finding out at the birth had been taken away.

So, dc3 arrives and is actually a girlGrin

Try not to read too much into it...

Summerdaydreams · 04/02/2015 12:37

We didn't want to find out and I was devastated when a doctor said 'him' after a scan, as We had always wanted the surprise at the end if the pregnancy and i thought he had ruined it.

I really do think drs automatically refer to the baby as a "him" because our baby turned out to be a girl. X

Zsazsabinks · 04/02/2015 12:53

In French all babies are masculine even if they're a girl! Le bebe!

It's just a pronoun, it's still 50/50.

JennyBlueWren · 04/02/2015 13:34

Generally I say "baby" but have been caught automatically saying "he" a few times which made people think we're having a boy (we don't know). Strange as I'm quite feminist about use of pronouns and generally avoid he or she if gender is unknown (I prefer "they/them").

jmojo · 04/02/2015 14:06

As a HCP I can tell you that the consultant will scan so many women every week that there is no way he will remember what you are having with any accuracy even if he had happened to notice it. It isn't written down anywhere unless you have an amnio or a CVS where they do the genes AND you have requested to know the sex. So I would say it was just a turn of phrase rather than using it. But hey there is a 50/50 chance he is right!! Smile

blackwidow74 · 04/02/2015 15:49

I think hcps just don't like to use the word 'it' so opt for he regardless

Original poster
upallnight2015 · 04/02/2015 15:56

I won't rush out and purchase a full boys wardrobe just yet then....Wink I've not wanted to know all along but the closer it gets, it just feels so real and I'm dying to know now! But yes, I agree, I guess it didn't really mean anything, it's still 50/50!

OP posts:
Jenny1231990 · 04/02/2015 18:00

I had this at my scan at 23weeks. She said baby this baby that all the way through. Then said there is his little heart beating, I picked up on it but OH didn't. She went back to saying baby then ha. X

rallytog1 · 04/02/2015 18:20

Every hcp I saw called my baby "him", after I said we didn't want to know the gender. I was sure they had let it slip.

Baby was a girl Grin

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