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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Asking DP to drink less in case I go into labour...?

14 replies

snowydrops · 02/02/2015 10:01

I am 34 weeks pregnant (DC2) and am wondering when (if ever) I should politely ask DP to perhaps drink less when out on a 'night out'. He doesn't go on many at all and I am in no way concerned about his drinking, drinks next to nothing unless 'out' but then when he does drink it tends to be quite a lot...

I don't really mind usually as it's infrequent (less than once a month) but I am now starting to feel a bit worried that if I go into labour he will not be able to a.) drive me to hospital, b.) sort out DD1 or c.) be any use at all.

He has 2 nights out planned over the next fortnight, I am not going to either so won't be able to 'suggest' he stops at any point :-)

What do others think? Is it reasonable to ask him to go lightly or really do I have nothing to worry about?

I should add we don't live all that close to family (over an hour) and are in the sticks so I am probably slightly more worried than when pregnant with DD1 as I was in the middle of a city so could always get myself where ever I needed to be if necessary.

I don't feel like baby is imminently about to arrive but 3 friends have given birth around this time in the last month so I am getting a bit anxious. I have also felt far more twinges / pains this time which is probably why I am worrying more as last time felt nothing until about 40 wks.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

DeanKoontz · 02/02/2015 10:07

Of course you need him to be on hand and sober just in case. Have the conversation with him.

pictish · 02/02/2015 10:11

Drinking less will do nothing. If he is to drive, he can't drink any! Not even one now.
I'd say he should self impose the ban at 38 weeks, as the vast majority of babies are born form this point on.
If you should be unlucky and go into labour before that, then a taxi would have to be called, or a willing friend or relative. Plenty have made it to hospital that way - not everyone can drive.

Original poster

snowydrops · 02/02/2015 10:14

Yes, I wouldn't expect him to stay totally sober from now until the end really...was just thinking for now I would have to get a taxi but would prefer him not to be really drunk...should I need him, 38wks onwards sounds reasonable for no drinking just in case he needs to drive! I've managed 9 months so I am sure a few weeks wont kill him.

OP posts:

Gudgyx · 02/02/2015 10:17

I'm 35 weeks now, and DP had his last boys day out before the baby comes yesterday for football. We didnt really speak about it, its just been sort of an unoffical agreement. Just talk to him, you'll probably find hes thinking something along the same lines

pictish · 02/02/2015 10:20

Not at all. My dh certainly had no problem abstaining from that point.
I swym about not being plastered though. Having a baby is pretty sobering stuff however, and seeing as he's not regularly getting shit faced anyway, I think the chances of him ever ending up steamboats at the birth are slim.
Try not to worry. xx

mollysmummy1970 · 02/02/2015 10:25

I was due on 23rd December and we imposed the "December ban". To be honest it was him that suggested it and was more family and friends that had an opinion, to which I replied, by all means he can drink but he will NOT be at the hospital with me if he has been, and if drinking is more important than seeing his first baby born then there's a problem, they soon shut up after that! X

Original poster

snowydrops · 02/02/2015 10:33

Yes i think that's reasonable, i think first time around I was due in mid Jan and I still let him get drunk (ish) on his Xmas party in early December but enforced a midnight curfew!! I think from that point he didn't drink (the last month) but I can't quite remember.

The problem with my OH is he absolutely HATES being asked / told what to do so I will have to approach it sensitively!

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Original poster

snowydrops · 02/02/2015 10:34

That's a good idea though, he would absolutely hate to miss anything I know that so perhaps I'll remind him that could happen as I wouldn't take him with me if drunk, one thing I can't stand the smell of alcohol at the moment (still) so I know I wouldn't want him near me in labour if he was plastered.

OP posts:

applecore0317 · 02/02/2015 11:43

I suggested to my DH that he doesn't drink in May at all, and sees it as a detox month, and he is fine with it

When I was birthing partner for my friend, I didn't drink in the lead up as I had to be available to drive her to the hospital as well, I don't think it's an unreasonable ask, as am sure that they wouldn't want to be called home from a night out drunk and then spend the labour attempting to sober up, followed by a hangover

PotteringAlong · 02/02/2015 11:48

Both times my DH hasn't drunk from 37 weeks until they were both born at 42 weeks

LittleGreyCatwithapinkcollar · 02/02/2015 20:15

My DH has agreed not to drink at all from 33 weeks just in case!

HermioneWeasley · 02/02/2015 20:25

How tiresome - why are you even having to ask him? He is responsible for making this baby which for 8 months you have kept alive and will go through labour to deliver and may well go on to be it's only source of food for 6 months. And it hasn't occurred to him that he might need to stay sober for a few weeks so he can perform his frankly minor part on this.

Fuck that.

GoooRooo · 02/02/2015 20:35

My DH stopped having booze at 36 weeks which is just as well as I went into labour 37+1.

I didn't have to ask - he just did it and realised it was sensible but if your DH isn't having that relisation then yes, you should talk to him about it.

ladyflower23 · 02/02/2015 20:47

I am 32 weeks and my DH got completely hammered this weekend. If I'd gone into Labour there is no way he would have been capable of supporting me or prob of even staying conscious!! We had a chat afterwards and agreed that from 37 weeks that cannot happen!!! he can still drink but only VERY sensibly. I think this is very generous of me. Like another said we give up for all that time the least they can do is make an effort in the last few weeks!

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