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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

35 weeks and not prepared - anyone else in same boat?

16 replies

Mexicantortilla · 23/01/2015 15:51

Still got another week to work yet, I'm really starting to struggle a bit. I've just started process to change hospital as one I'm under won't let me VBAC so midwife said if I change hospitals I could go for home birth against medical advice, only problem is I've just realised how close I am and what shifts I've got left to do (nurse on nights). I've not packed any bags and not washed anything yet to go in them, house is a mess, dreading midwife coming actually, we are mid build outside and not even started on the house yet, plug sockets don't work in the bedroom but there is a ceiling light. Any advice? Anyone in a similar situation?
If I stayed with current hospital they wanted to do ELSC at 37/38 weeks, I've just realised that could only be a week after I finish work, I've no mattress or bedding etc yet either? Starting to get a bit tearful which I know doesnt help.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

3littlebadgers · 23/01/2015 15:59

Ok I am 35 weeks too, and have gone into early nesting over drive. If you are anywhere near me I will gladly come round and nest for you it'll be good for us both. Get you ready and give me something to get stuck into as there is literally nothing left for me to do and I'm going crazy repeating myself.
On a serious note though, newborns don't exactly need a lot. As long as you have some sort of sleeping arrangement sorted, a few nappies and know how you are going to feed. You will be ok. Shops are open everyday, and the Internet is wonderful. Try not to stree about the home things, and get the hospital sorted and I am sure things will just fall into place.

3littlebadgers · 23/01/2015 16:00

Stress not stree

AliceInHinterland · 23/01/2015 16:04

I wasn't ready at 35 weeks, can you order the bedding & stuff you are most stressed out about today? the baby obviously only wants to be warm, dry, cuddled, fed and somewhere to sleep (preferably on you) - are you missing any of those?

Original poster

Mexicantortilla · 23/01/2015 16:09

Thanks, I just need to get a mattress and bedding for Moses basket it's just I need to keep working to pay builders so there's never anything left! I really don't want to work this weekend and next week as it's really a struggle now, the most sleep I get is 4 hours between school runs, DH works away but is home on weekends, I'm dick of jumping through hoops as whatever has happened through the week is never good enough and he just critises, the only interest he shows is wanting to know when I'm going to have baby as he needs to know if it's going to fit with his work commitments, I feel like he can actually go screw himself and I think I'd rather be on my own. Does anyone know at what point in labour midwife comes to home birth?

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Original poster

Mexicantortilla · 23/01/2015 16:11

On my own for birth I mean

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3littlebadgers · 23/01/2015 16:15

I had a home birth with dc3 as far as I can remember when I was contracting fairly regularly I called her, she came round and then when birth was more imminent (when I started to moo) she called the second one.

AliceInHinterland · 23/01/2015 16:24

Is DH always that critical? Can anyone else support you? It sounds like he needs to sort his attitude out a bit but in the short term you need to be really comfortable about your birth plan. Is there a really cheap mattress you can buy - the baby won't care. Perhaps call the midwife and ask about the labour & let her know that you're worried about the mess - sure she can reassure that she has been to far worse!

Original poster

Mexicantortilla · 23/01/2015 16:28

Got a booking in appointment next week for home delivery do I'll ask then.

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Original poster

Mexicantortilla · 23/01/2015 16:30

And yeah, he's a perfectionist and I'm never perfect!

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Levismum · 23/01/2015 17:04

I literally did everything at 38/39 weeks with dd. But,considering I had only got to 39 weeks once out of 5 pregnancies, I did leave it all too late.

Thankfully dd was a week late. Once I got started there was no stopping me.

Ignore your dh. I hate my dh whilst pregnant...and for about a year after!

Good luck.

AliceInHinterland · 23/01/2015 17:25

Yeah I packed the night before I went into labour, I had an idea that if I was early I could pack in between contractions to keep me occupied. Probably only works for your first though. Women have given birth without men forever so go for it if you don't want him there winding you up. DH needs to realise that if he's going to be a perfectionist he needs to do it himself. Done Is better than perfect.

geekymommy · 23/01/2015 18:08

You're never perfect? Know who else is like that? EVERYBODY IN THE WORLD, INCLUDING YOUR DH.

Was your first child with him? If so, he should know that you can't schedule a birth, particularly not a vaginal birth.

JennyBlueWren · 23/01/2015 19:50

I'll be 36 weeks tomorrow. I have a lot of stuff piled up in the spare room and went through my list yesterday and bought all the rest of the the stuff on Amazon and Mothercare (wherever was cheaper). I haven't done my hospital bag yet but plan to start tomorrow. I've got another 3 weeks of work to go. House is a mess but DH is out of work just now so keep giving him jobs to do (also handy that he's in for all the deliveries!).

hazel88 · 23/01/2015 20:41

I'm 36w and have been the same; have had electricians in pulling walls apart, we ripped the whole of the bedroom out and started again, had no bedroom furniture and online companies weren't delivering furniture we'd paid for bla bla bla right old stress! Still have stuff to buy now. People have said to me about how close it is to the due date and how we haven't had everything sorted but my attitude towards it is that things will get done as they get done...I don't have control over everything and there's absolutely no point in me stressing about it. I'm normally an utter control freak and when not working I'm running at 100mph so it's been hard to slow down and take a more relaxed approach.

Shops are always open so even if baby were to arrive now and we weren't as organised as I'd hoped it's not the end of the world to nip out to stock up. You will always find a way to manage and if things aren't finished when DC arrives then they can be finished after. Yes it would be nice if everything was lovely and new and in place way before DC's arrival but in reality it's bloody difficult to be so well organised when you have such a lot to do!

Take a deep breath and try to relax about it, things will get finished in time. You'll manage just fine and what will be will be, just make sure you look after yourself and your little one

blondie1001 · 23/01/2015 20:50

36 weeks here and no baby clothes, bedding (or bed of some description) or hospital bag sorted yet. I think I'm in denial about the whole thing!

Kerala2712 · 23/01/2015 21:25

I'm a gp- go to your doctor (yes it is urgent today when the receptionist asks- that pisses us off as much as you) and get them to sign you off sick until you finish. You do not need all this stress, especially if you are going to have a vbac. Stress/ exhaustion/ pregnancy difficulties are all completely reasonable things to have on a sick note, your boss can't and won't complain, and you will feel better for it I promise. If you came to see me I would sign you off without thinking twice. DO NOT carry on like this- work is the least important thing you need to do.

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