When to start your maternity leave?

[greenlizard]

I am 23 weeks and my boss has asked me when I am intending to start my maternity leave and I have no idea! At the moment I feel great but as it this is my first how do I know what I will feel like? My due date is 20 March 2015 and I was thinking maybe the end of February.

Does that sound reasonable? What did you do/wished you had done?

[Fridayschild]

I used annual leave to stop working at 36 weeks. Though I felt fine and was lucky to have a healthy pregnancy I was much better after 10 days off - blood pressure down, minor ankle swelling vanished. Most people find it hard to sleep when they are heavily PG and you will feel tired. Because the feeling tired grows gradually during your pregnancy you don't really notice it.

Then baby came 10 days early and I still wasn't ready!

As others have said, listen to your body. I was young and strong and fit and ambitious at work. I've seen others struggle on later and I don't think they are doing anyone any favours.

No longer young... But the rest still applies!

[LIG1979]

Last time I started at 37+1 more because I had a lot of social plans and didn't think I could do them all and go to work. dd then turned up at 38 weeks so I never had a break. This time I intend to go 36-37 weeks so I have a chance to get organised and rest whilst dd is at nursery. (I have had so little time to myself since dd was born -I am extremely excited already and only 19 weeks at the moment.)

[GreenPetal94]

The last month or so you do feel very knackered, so if you can stop about 35 weeks I would. Also this avoids any fear of your waters breaking in the office!

My friend's waters broke at 37 weeks, just 1 hour after leaving work and then of course she started maternity leave early. However she was always soooo glad they didn't break in the office as she is in a very senior role, close one!

[CoffeeTwo]

I finished at 36 weeks and I don't think I could have worked one more day. DS came a few days early too so I'm glad I had that bit of time to rest and prepare.

[expectantmum79]

I am 33 weeks and was intending to start maternity leave 5 days before my due date with a few weeks annual leave beforehand (which must be taken or lost). This would mean going off at 35 weeks. I already have a number of work deadlines to meet before I go, most of which I can hopefully manage but will not have a spare minute and i'm planning a handover for my replacement. This week has been really difficult and they've just announced observations for my final week so feeling stressed to say the least. Starting to wonder if I can bring my maternity forward by a week as I'll be taking marking home anyway and it's all too much.

What works for you works for you and you're right; it's difficult to anticipate how you'll feel in the final trimester.

[Annbag]

I look back and regret I didn't finish earlier. Not wanting to worry anyone but prematurity is more common than you might think (about 7-8% of pregnancies). Still feel guilty for having nothing ready and still being at work although there was no way I could've known, and I believed the first babies are late stories! Luckily I was at home in the evening when everything happened and not in the office. So you never know what will happen - I wish I'd had a few weeks (or even a weekend) being bored

[ChatEnOeuf]

I was ushered out at 33w. Fine, as we were moving house and the time off to organise stuff was welcome, but physically I was capable of working until 36w which was my original plan. Delivered at 37w.

[PinkyAndTheBump]

I'm aiming to work from home through January - with a due date of 9th Feb, but likely to be brought in earlier for 39w induction due to age.

I might go into the office, but only travelling outside of rush hour - even though it's "only" 25 mins on the tube. We've got a fantastic hospital directly opposite in case anything happens on those days. I think I'm going to pack a mini-hospital bag, and photocopy of all my notes just in case...

[HamishBamish]

I was due to finish at 38 weeks the first time, but DS1 was born early at 37 weeks. Second time around I worked until the day before my due date. DS2 was born the following day.

I felt relatively well both times and didn't have a long commute. If I had felt I needed the rest I would have stopped earlier. I did value having all my accrued holiday which in addition to parental leave at the end of my mat leave meant I didn't have to go back until both children were around 18 months.

[phoebs88]

I'm planning to finish at 35 weeks, then have annual leave to take me up to my due date in Jan (our holiday year runs to 31 Dec so I have this year's leave to use up as well as next) when my maternity leave will start.

Planning to take the full year and will then be rolling over about 4 weeks of annual leave, so will be off until the end of feb. Works out at almost 15 months off.

I've been lucky with annual leave timings really, I have a long commute so am really looking forward to finishing in a couple of weeks' time.

[Treesandbees]

I finished at 34 weeks, had 1 weeks leave then mat leave started. DS was induced and arrived 39 + 2. I would say that I really enjoyed the time off and needed the rest. I was exhausted physically and mentally by the time he arrived. You wont get the time back so I would say try and have at least a couple of weeks off. If we have another baby I plan to take 3 weeks min before due date.

[shrunkenhead]

I worked up to 38 weeks, assuming my first would be late and I'd have at least 2wks off before baby arrived.....my waters broke on my last day in work meaning I had to open my leaving gifts sat on bin bags and towels, and missed my leaving do as was busy with contractions/pushing a baby out!
I wasn't well with SPD and, in retrospect, wished I'd finished earlier.

[letsleepingbabieslie]

I stopped at 37 weeks last time, expecting at least two weeks off, and baby was early (went into labour at 37 and a half weeks) so had just a few days off - DEFINITELY not enough time to adjust. Even if you have nothing major to get sorted at home, a bit of time to adjust your head space is really important. And don't believe people who tell you it will be late because it's your first. I knew from day one mine would be early and kept telling the midwives he was going to be early, and nobody would listen - so trust your body.
This time round I'm going at 35 weeks. It's a tough choice because of course the earlier you go the less time you get afterwards with baby. But a friend of mine made a very good point - this is the last chance you will have to get ANY time to yourself for at least a year. When I say "any" I mean A.N.Y. You will be up all day and all night looking after your baby, you won't be able to shower or go to the toilet alone for years to come (I'm not joking - DS is nearly 3 now and comes with me every time). You will be eating with a fork in one hand and a baby in the other for months. It's intense, and a few extra days - even if they're boring - of "me" time is a luxury you will look back on and savour. I think once you have a child you never get real me-time again, so I would advocate going a bit early.
Good luck!

[MontserratCaballe]

DC1 - worked until my due date and she was born a week later.

DC2 - worked until the date of my planned CS (week before due date).

DC3 - only 18 months after DC2 and I was knackered. I had a planned section on 1st Dec and went on ML a week before as I was too tired to commute.

Good luck.

[smilingthroughgrittedteeth]

Im due on 23rd March and plan on maternity leave starting on 2nd March when ill be 37 weeks.

ill reassess a bit nearer the time and if I need to ill use holiday for the 2 weeks before.

Im a nanny with school age charges so am fortunate that I can rest during the day if I need to.

[Number3cometome]

With DS I left 4 weeks before DD, he was born on DD and I was bored shitless for 4 weeks.

With DD I left on the Friday, had her on the following Friday.
Spent that week bored not quite so shitless, but still bored!

[croon979]

I am due in June and planning to leave work in mid April when I will be 32/33 weeks. I am going to use up all my holiday entitlement up to a week before the due date when my maternity leave will start (otherwise I will lose them as I have to take them in my annual leave year which runs from Jan to December and my maternity leave takes me beyond 2014).

I am really looking forward to having some proper time to get things ready and to have some time to myself. I have worked really hard for 14 years in my job with any break and the way I see it is that I will never get this time back again. I also have a very stressful job which I really don't think will be workable when i am heavily pregnant and the stress certainly won't be good for the baby.

I intend to read loads, watch box sets, swim, walk, nest, decorate and batch bake. I am really excited about it and only hope that i am well enough to enjoy it.

[Mrscog]

number3cometome you need some hobbies!

Croon sounds bloody amazing :)

[croon979]

Ha thanks MrsCog, I think so too!

[bluebeanie]

Left two weeks before due date and dd arrived 12 days after due date (day I was meant to go for induction). I think babies in dh's family were all born late. Will leave one week before due date next time. I was so emotional with the waiting. The worse bit was the text messages after due date etc. HATED IT. If we had news, we would tell you!

[Number3cometome]

Mrscog My hobby is the gym, which obviously at very pregnant is impossible haha!

This time around I will leave the day before if I can face the commute.

[Snaveanator]

Im not working this time around so don't have to worry but with my DS I stayed at work until 37+2.... My labour started at 2am at 37+3!