Why are people so annoying?

[cactus123]

Sorry but I just need to vent!!

I'm nearly 34 weeks and I have a teeny bump, but I have no worries about it as baby is absolutely EVERYWHERE, I can feel her all over so she's not tiny or anything! I am 5ft7 and am very slim and only around 53kg which is normal for me.

All that anybody can ever seem to say to me is 'Wow, you're absolutely tiny!!!' or when I post anything on facebook, there is always somebody that thinks that they are so much more knowledgable about pregnancy just because they're a couple of weeks ahead of me. I know it might be meant well, but please just f* off! I am lucky enough to have an amazing independent midwife, as well as my mum who is a fantastic midwife and also teaches HypnoBirthing - they are all happy that I'm on track for a water birth at home, with no worries for babies size or anything or sending me for a silly amount of growth scans etc. so please can everybody just stop telling me that I'm small!!

I get it too. I'm 5'2 but baby is very well concealed and at 35 weeks, I'm measuring 31 and really don't look 'heavily' pregnant. OH's mum is probably the worst, coming down to see us before baby is born and saying that she was 'disappointed' that I wasn't bigger and that she'd expected something more impressive..talk about ways to squash an already self conscious person, especially when I naturally feel the size of a whale.
People seem to think that a pregnancy is public business when really, they should bugger off and leave us alone. Just because I'm pregnant does not mean I want to spend my days having conversations with strangers about it while they try to touch my bump.
I feel your pain!

Bloody hell poor you - that's even worse! My OH's mum is similar but not to that extent, that is so rude!! She just seems to think that because I'm not big the baby's going to be tiny.

We are lucky really as we are small enough to still get away with doing more everyday things and not be quite so restricted! :D

I feel your pain only backwards. I'm 29 weeks measuring 27 but apparently look huge. This is my 2nd dd and I carried the same way with the first. I'm 5ft 4 ish and usually a size 6-8 so any bump is going to make me look bigger than normal. My mother is the worst for telling me how massive I am

That must be equally as irritating!! Why can't people just realise that everybody is different?!

I'm so glad I'm not alone - thought I was just being ridiculous!

I get this a lot. 'Ooh, you must be having the smallest baby ever!' 'Wow, your labour will be so easy!' Pretty sure there's not a huge correlation there, actually.

My MW very carefully referred to my bump as 'neat' last time I saw her, which is vastly preferable to 'small' because people telling me how small it is makes me want to kick them in the ribs and scream 'How do you like it?!'

Hmm - I get told all the time I'm 'huge'. Very annoying. This is DC3 so I wouldn't mind if I was but I was sent for a growth scan this week as I'm measuring small for dates. (All fine - I'm just 'compact' according to the sonographer midwife - not 'huge' then.) Comments either way can upset people - too big = too fat/eating too much/difficult birth imminent, whereas too small = selfish vain mother depriving her baby of nutrients/something wrong with the baby. Maybe people just expect me to be huge as it's my third. Or maybe because I'm normally a size 8 and 5'5'' so bump looks more obvious? I dunno. They can all feck off anyway. (Am in a bad mood today .)

I get the neat comments as well. I know I'm not sylphlike normally (5' 3" in 16/18 clothes) but it's as if they expect me to be huge.

When I was pregnant with DD I put on 3 stone taking me to 19 stone and was told by everyone even the midwife that my baby was going to be at least 10lb because of how big I was. Well shows how much people know as she was only 6lb. With this pregnancy (I'm 14+5) I'm not really that big (although I have lost 8 stone since having DD 5 years ago) if anyone starts on how big or small I am in this pregnancy I might just have to bitch slap them!!

I dislike how people touch my bump and go awwwww! Or when I say ooo I'm tired go hhahaa wait till the baby's head your never gonna sleep! I know it's a side note to bump size comments but I really wanna just give these people a boot up the bum!

Oh, I feel for you.

But really, they're just getting you ready for the fact that having a baby is an excuse to criticise your parenting skills, how you feed your baby, how you settle your baby, and oh, just wait for the comments about how your figure's changed, and when are you "going again"!

Then come questions about where you'll live, and schools, and your choice of child care and whether you go back to work, or 'try for a better work life balance' - you'll be judged, hanged and quartered any which way you decide so no point in getting worked up and huffy - for starters it's a waste of energy (and you need that).

It never ends really, so the trick is to grow a thick skin fast and have some witty one liners ready.

Best of luck ladies!

OP I could have written your post myself!

Constant 'blimey you're small' comments all the way through. Not very helpful AT ALL when fundal height measurement was below the 10th centile and I was silently really very worried.

(As it turns out every growth scan I had showed a completely average sized baby proving that bump size means nothing anyway.)

I'm now 38 weeks and thoroughly enjoying being away from work and the constant stream of comments and questions and 'advice' from work colleagues. It drove me completely barmy, I'm not sure how I held my tongue towards the end.

I appreciate it must be hard not to voice your opinion if you feel like you've alraeady 'been through it all' but please don't preach to me as if I'm a complete moron who has never even picked up a bloody leaflet on the subject.

And yes, I know the labour will be very painful and the first year can be very difficult. Do you really have to remind me a squillion times a day how hard things are going to be?! I Hardly have a choice as to whether this baby comes out or not and, as it happens, I'm quite looking forward to it and I'd rather focus on the positive aspects of the next year thankyou very much.

Don't even get me started on their labour stories. One colleague must have told me her labour story about 5 (boring) times and each time said "I don't want to put you off but my labour went like this etc etc..."

Put me off???!!!!!!!!!

It sounds like you have a lovely set-up with your midwife, mum and home birth by the way. Hope you can continue to look forward to it without strangling someone in the process!!

I barely showed at all with DS with bump only becoming obvious enough to requiring shelving of non pregnancy jeans at 37 weeks. Growth scan showed normal baby, however he was 9lb 2oz, only 2lb less than my weight gain.
So bigs babies very possible with little bumps and vice versa.
This time I am measuring small (I am30 w, measuring 23), but feel huge compared to last time.
I also get the neat comment, or 'you don't look pregnant from the front!'. What am I supposed to say to that? I mean seriously, wait 2 minutes for full abdo can-can, which are always visible, due to my neat bump. Grrr
And yes bellyrub, loving the 'put you off' type comments too, like you can change your mind now! Or perhaps they mean you might stop concentrating, and forget the baby us there ;)