Hello! Sorry for the long post - but I'm just in search of some reassuring anecdotes here from people whose partners have gone awful just before the baby is due.
I'm 37 weeks pregnant with our first baby, and have been lucky enough to have a pretty uneventful pregnancy. No real hormonal ups and downs until the last week or so. DH of 10 yrs has been happy & excited throughout the pregnancy. While he's never been the cossetting, pampering type, I've never really expected that, so it's been fine.
But I'm in the home stretch, and things are getting physically uncomfortable and a bit emotionally overwhelming. We're under a fair bit of stress: we've got some last minute building works and DH is in the process of changing jobs. He's suddenly become more & more withdrawn, unsympathetic, and sometimes a bit mean and controlling. He doesn't seem to hear me at all when I talk to him. If I'm having trouble bending down to pick something up, he just watches me struggle and won't help. He makes fun of my 'fat pregnant face'. If I chat to him about my work (and he happens to be in the mood to listen), he criticises the way I do my job, gets angry and insistent that I'm going about things in a stupid and inefficient way, accuses me of being over-sensitive when I tell him to back off, and then tries to force me to apologise for having upset him by arguing. He's been making the builder re-do and re-do things, shouting & swearing at him and then storming off, leaving me to try to resolve the conflict & apologise for his behaviour. He was a complete wanker in our NCT class and refused to chat to anyone in the tea and lunch breaks, which was embarrassing and meant that we didn't make any friends there.
DH is quite anxious in general, and because he's turned into Mr Hyde suddenly at a time of huge upheaval, I'm hoping it is all attributable to stress and worry and will resolve itself in time. But of course, raising a baby is stressful, and the thought that he might be this horrible on a permanent basis terrifies me. I could also really do with some support - we have no family nearby, and having just gone on mat leave I'm feeling really isolated and alone. Everyone keeps telling me this is the time when I should be relaxing and putting my feet up - but DH seems massively resentful of the fact that I'm not working and makes a huge show of how tired and achey he is at the end of the day.
I've tried gently talking to him about how I feel, and acknowledging how I imagine he must be feeling (stressed / scared / burdened with responsibility / possibly trapped, etc), in the hope of getting back to a place where we can support each other through the difficult times ahead, but he's either completely blank or becomes angry with me.
I suppose what I'm wondering is whether this is a thing that happens to men just before babies are born - and if so, is it temporary? Or will it just get worse when the baby's here? Please reassure me!