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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

babys dad want me to abort unplanned pregnacy

8 replies

daniellegoodman12 · 10/09/2014 19:53

Iv just found out im pregnant and in a rather complicated situation. Me and the dad have been seeing each other for about 7/8 months now. We live together but theres one problem his ex lives with us too. I told him yesterday that I was pregnant. The day he buried his grandad. And hes told me we cant keep it. And that if we was together and had been for a whike it would probably be a different story. But he wants me to get an abortion. I said yes to it at first. but the more I think about it, the harder it is to do it. Part of me wants to keep the baby. Im against abortion. I had one when I was younger, but regreted it afterwards!. I dont think I could go through that again as much as he tells me that he loves me and I love him. I dont think I could forgive myself or him for pushing me towards this. We havent spoken properly about it. Just been messaging for the moment. Im finding this so so hard. I don't want to lose him, but if I go through this I know ill end up resenting him for it and most likely hating him. What do I do..

OP posts:
ChazzerChaser · 10/09/2014 19:56

You do what feels right to you. It sounds like an awful situation. But you need to be true to you.

LiberalLibertines · 10/09/2014 19:57

Oh Lord, this does sound complicated!

Did you move in to him and his ex's house?!

Telling him the day he buried his granddad was pretty bad timing.

Can I ask how old you are?

Ultimately, you need to decide if you want him or the baby.

Bearleigh · 10/09/2014 20:02

And if you want to bring up a baby on your own...

Bearleigh · 10/09/2014 20:05

Sorry I posted that too early. I am so sorry for your situation, but it sounds a bit tricky with his ex being around, and especially with him not wanting the child. It could be very difficult on your own.

sunnyrosegarden · 10/09/2014 20:37

But ultimately, this has to be your choice. Do you have support or family around?

Scoobsmam13 · 10/09/2014 20:44

Perhaps it might help to speak to someone impartial? BPAS might be a good place to start. You have time on your side if it is still early days so you can make the informed decision which is right for you. It does sound like you and he still need to have a proper discussion, but it is your choice at the end of the day.

pinkteapots · 10/09/2014 21:49

Bringing up a baby on your own, if he really wants nothing to do with it, wouldnt be easy. Having said that, I cant see anyone in your situation or similar, having the baby (albeit on your own) and regretting it. This guy might be around in a year or 10 years or he might not, relationships start and end all the time. Your child though, is your child forever. It would be hard, but ultimately its not his decision, and if you dont want an abortion dont feel forced to have one.

VeryLittleGravitasIndeed · 10/09/2014 21:56

An unwanted pregnancy is never easy to deal with, they tend to through up lots of hard questions. I hope you have some real life support and someone you can talk this through with.

Abortion is a very personal decision. It's your body, you need to decide for yourself. Don't let him decide for you.

Absolutely do be practical about how you would cope without his support though, as it sounds like that might happen if you decide to keep the baby. Babies are a lot of work, so I don't just mean financial support.

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