Hi ladies,
After weeks of stalking Mumsnet I've decided to join to finally ask for some advice. Sorry if this is in the wrong place!
I'm currently 16 weeks pregnant with my first baby after 4 years of infertility and a successful FET cycle, I'm just starting to reach the excited stage after weeks of sheer panic, but I'm really struggling with work at the minute and don't know where to turn.
I started a new role 10 months ago in a very busy department of a university, I work under 4 different managers all of whom have different roles and none of which fully understand what I actually do. I am soley responsible for the pastoral care of 5 busy year groups, as well as the administrative care for one of the taught modules, no one else in the department shares my responsibilities so if it doesn't get done it's down to me. I've been left to it since I starting, which I normally like, but I have has very little guidance in what should be done and when - I.e. Often getting asked "has XYZ been completed?" Without anyone telling me what XYZ is or that it needed doing. I was left no handover notes by the previous person in my position BUT have coped pretty well so far. (Majority of the time I do love my job)
However, since it's education and a new academic term is approaching I'm completed overwhelmed. I have a 'to-do' list as long as me and this is without anything else being added on that I don't know needs doing (sorry, I don't know if I'm making sense). This is further complicated by the fact that a colleague of mine recently asked my manager what maternity cover would be put in place when I left and was told they were not planning on doing anything and asking other people to "pick up" my responsibilities. This not only makes me feel really angry that they don't deem me important enough to cover but now the only colleague who is in a position to provide support has decided she will not get involved in anything I am working on what so ever so as to make sure she is not asked to take on the work when I leave. I do not blame my colleague for this, after all she has her own full time work to do, but this leaves me with no-one.
To make matters slightly worst my most senior manager is also pregnant (20 week) and although has been superficial supportive ("take it easy" "let me know of you need help") is also piling on the work and asking me to take on extra bits where possible.
I took two days off last week due to anxiety related insomnia and exhaustion but then ended up working from home as the work needed to be done and I feel immense guilt for taking time off. I don't feel like I can take time off at all because 1600 students and 100+ NHS staff are relying on me to get things done. But currently I'm loosing sleep trying to cope with all of this and the last thing I want to do is cause any possible harm to baby. (It's not 5.43am and I've been awake since 2.30am)
How do you all cope? Pregnant woman work much more stressful jobs than me and I just feel a bit pathetic at the minute and like I need to pull myself together and just get on with it!