Am I being selfish?

[BeccaBrkr7]

I'm now 38+1 and have just been in hospital with DD1 as she's had a tonsillectomy due to sleep apnea! The recovery has been totally awful! She struggles to even drink. She's having meds every 4 hours but it seems to be wearing off too fast and now she's struggling to take them! She's having horrific tantrums, kicking, hitting me and pulling my clothes! Not sleeping! I know she's not well but it's totally draining! Getting up every 3 hours to check on her in the night! DP is working every day all day so never has a day at home to give me a hand! He's self employed so he can choose to go to work as and when!
We've just had a blazing row because I've asked him not to work and help me with DD tomorrow! All I'm asking is for a little bit of help as there isn't anyone else that can! He's taking on all these jobs right around the time of DD2 being born and it's not leaving him anytime to be with us!
Not sure if I'm just being hormonal or if what I'm saying to him is fair!

YANBU at all!!!! You need some rest and your DH needs to man up before the imminent arrival of dd2.

DH does this - works v hard to avoid domestic duties when it's looking a bit trickier than usual.

No YANBU.
DS1 had exactly the same - don't know how many days post-op your DD is, but the ward warned us day 5 would be the worst, and boy were they right! But it does get better after that. It was bloody tough and I wasn't even pregnant (had 6mo DS2). Your DH needs to put work aside and help. It's going to be so draining for you at this late stage in pregnancy. You need to rest and he needs to sort his priorities out.

Why is she hitting/ kicking you?

Yes it was the 5th day yesterday post op and it was definitely the worst one! We've been up lot tonight with her. He's helping me to get her to relax and take meds! She's getting herself into such a state and she'll kick and scream for sometimes half an hour which must be making her throat 10x worse!!
I really hope DP will stay home and help me as we've had a rough night! I struggle on 6 hours sleep so not sure how I'll cope on 4!!
Thanks for the reassurance! Thought I was going a little OTT!! X

Well I hope he does stay home today. She'll be in agony so that's why the kicking and screaming. Day 5 is apparently when it starts to crust over and is not at all pleasant for little ones. After day 5-6 DS1 got better and better, but total recovery did take about the 2 weeks they said it would. Hang in there, hopefully you're through the worst.

Well he didn't stay home or say bye or anything so I guess I've annoyed him by standing up for myself!
Hoping for a better day with DD!!

Hope things have been getting better for you. I know how you feel, as I'm due the day after you with #5 and it's so much easier with dh at home.

However, is it possible he's worried about providing for you all? Does he get any money in if he's not working? Maybe he's trying to work as much as possible before the baby arrives so he can take time off then. Does he have a plan for paternity leave to support you?