pregnancy/parenting book

[molly84]

Hello, I'm currently just over halfway through my first pregnancy and starting to think about types of parenting styles and buying a good book/s for the latter stage of pregnancy and life with a newborn. There are so many out there, and I'm a bit confused. Currently I've just been following nhs advice and advice from mumsnet. However, I really would like a good reference book to have at hand. My husband and I want to have quite a relaxed approach to parenting, but not attachment parenting as we do want some structure and routine. I definitely feel I want us to be child led in the early days but perhaps more parent led as he gets older? Does this make sense? What sort of book would you recommend? I'm keen to breast feed. I've also got a science background so I like an evidence based approach. Sorry if this is a bit waffly, but I'm just a bit overwhelmed with all the information out there. Thank you.

Ooh I'm interested in this too and have similar ideas/ background. My mum said she'd buy me Penelope Leach's Baby and Child book as that's what she used with me... I remember I read it through at age 12 (!) and it was mainly common sense stuff. I particularly remember the bit about how to sort out if a boy get his willy stuck In his flies, that kind if useful reference stuff!!! Not sure if it had a 'parenting style' though. I'm hoping we'll kind of find our own way as long as we have some guidance for the important stuff... Found I can't rely on mum for some stuff as things have changed so much ("well you'll want to get them into their own room ASAP, you were out of our room by ten days old...")

No recommendations for you but would suggest you have a look at books in your local library. Have skim read of them and see if you see yourself agreeing or arguing with them and if they suit your approach.

Thanks guys!

Yes your library will save you £££!!

One piece of advice which has been the same from every experienced mum I've spoken to though- from 65 to 25, from 1 kid to 4 - is take parenting 'styles' and gurus with a pinch of salt, they are selling a product. Having worked with kids many years I have seen over adherence to a philosophy backfire and result in unhappy kids too.
I read a range of books from the library and looked for 'universal' themes (e.g. starting out with feeding on demand, appropriate stimulation, importance of feeding 'milestones') as things which probably work and help for most people - anything very extreme (either routine/tiger-parent or lentil weavy) I viewed as a USP of the author and unlikely to work with every child or be applicable to everyone so not something I would grasp to. Doesn't hurt to know what they are though in case they do work.

I've bought (second had- charity shops and Amazon are great for this) "First Time Parent" which is more of a guide book on how to do various things, what to expect, who you need to contact at certain points. Also "Commando Dad" for DH which is a how-to manual for hands on dads, shorter and a bit more lighthearted. I knew I'd use them a lot because they're stuff you need to know, rather than a background philosophy.
www.amazon.co.uk/First-Time-Parent-honest-brilliantly-staying/dp/0007269447/ref=sr_1_3?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1407061384&sr=1-3&keywords=the+first+time+parent

The rest I used the library and Youtube! Free! :)

Great advice thanks

Your Baby Week by Week was handy in the early days with both DD and DS.