Horrible hospital appointment today!

[bluehearted]

I had a consultant appointment this morning to discuss my elective c section. This c section was agreed upon early on in my pregnancy (currently 35 weeks) due to post traumatic stress as a result of my ds's extremely difficult delivery, which led to a prolonged recovery for me and for him.

I received a letter last week saying my appointment for 6th August had been moved to 28th July. My dh is army and is away at the minute, so I was going on my own.

The doctor I saw wasn't the same doctor who I had seen before (who was lovely, compassionate and agreed c section was best option). this doctor didn't introduce himself, complained I was there a week early (I explained why). He was so rude, from start to finish. He was dismissive of my reasons for having a c section, he openly said he wouldn't have agreed in the first place. He said that if I go into labour before my c section date (3 days before my due date) they will not give me a c section and I'll have to "cope".

The whole appointment left me really upset. The midwife who was in there looked like she wanted to disagree but couldn't, she was lovely and I've seen her 3 times before.

I have rang and requested the midwife call me, so we can come up with a robust birth plan for if I go into labour and they won't do a section. Im not opposed to going for a natural delivery but only under very strict birth plan.

I'm not sure why I'm posting this, I'm just upset at the way I was treated and spoken to and don't have many people to talk to about this in real life.

He sounds like a real arse. There's really no call for medical staff to treat anyone like that, so dismissively and overbearing.

Get it put into your notes that you never want to deal with him again, ever - and if you really feel like it, consider contacting PALS. At the very least it will make you feel as though you've achieved something to stop him being like that with anyone else.

Hope your MW can sort something out for you.

Sympathy! You ought to complain. Even if he disagreed it was unprofessional of him to say so and it is certainly not his job to upset you like that!

You poor thing. What a horrible arrogant tw*t of a consultant. Hopefully you will never see him again. Hope your mw calls soon. Good Luck.

Your posting because you had a plan in place which you were happy with and felt understood and cared for and now you have had the rug pulled by some big ego'd tosser consultant- Im guessing a bloke!! He's changed the rules and now your floundering.

Good for you being strong enough to consider a birth plan and getting it put into place asap.

Whatever happens you will be fine xx

The midwife should have said something. She's meant to be your advocate. Might be worth asking to talk to a supervisor of midwives if you get nowhere.

Get a second opinion (and maybe a doula?) is your husband the type to fight your corner when he gets back? Is he home for the birth? Good luck op x

Thank you everyone for your comments. I'm pleased to see I'm not just over reacting!!
My husband will be home on Friday, away again Sunday to Wednesday but then have some leave and will be home for the birth. He will definitely fight my corner and if I go with a natural birth he will ensure my birth plan is stuck to!
I just hate how I was made to feel, I will certainly not deal with him again! Worst doctors appointment I've ever had. I have severe SPD which he completely dismissed.

You are entitled to a section if you want it. I had an elcs 5 weeks ago for similar reasons and was told at appointment that if I went into labour and wanted a section to make sure I hot footed it to the hospital.

You should complain.

I had 2 consultants like this one said that I was to stop crying cos it makes her look like a bad dr and her next patient will upset and 2nsd one told me under no citrcumstances will she move my c section as prem bbies dnt do well I'm having c sectiob at 38+6 only wanted week before due to spd fibro etc right awful treatment

COMPLAIN COMPLAIN COMPLAIN.

I am having an ELCS on the basis of severe anxiety. It was agreed at 16 weeks.

Whilst you are NOT entitled to an ELCS if you want one, there are mental health reasons that it might be the best thing for you. REMEMBER MENTAL HEALTH REASONS ARE HEALTH REASONS AND ARE AS VALID AS ANY PHYSICAL REASON. YOUR REQUEST IS NOT SIMPLY A MATERNAL REQUEST.

Really useful post RedToothBrush will be referring back to that!

Massive sympathy to you bluehearted . If Dr has a problem with your choices then he should have referred you to someone else. Totally unhelpful to go off on you like that. Only served to give him a nice little power trip IMO. Twat.

Like you I am requesting ELCS, not because of past trauma but just extremely anxious about VB, always have been. Don't really identify it as being a phobia or mental health issue, because to me these fears are logical and rational, and CS is a safe and commonly occurring alternative.

Nothing like as bad as what you have just been through, but I can empathise. I came up against a judgemental consultant last week. I went from being totally relaxed and positive about birth to being up all night catastrophising.

I feel I need to exaggerate my birth fears to be treated respectfully by HCPs. I genuinely do get panicky and tearful, but I hold it together at appointments and would find it undignified and stressful to be pushed to that point. Why should I have to get in a state to obtain what is pretty much enshrined in good practice guidance? Makes me so angry!

Hopefully your MW will be able to put this straight and get an appropriate plan b in place in case you go into labour before CS appointment.