Feeling scared and lonely

[BettySpaghetti514]

I'm already a mum of one, he's 5 years old, we live together and I'm expecting my second child - a daughter - in October with my partner who lives nearby and has two older children aged 12 and 14 (they live with mum).

I have post traumatic stress disorder and have problems with anxiety and with pregnancy fuelling it all the more it's becoming difficult to remain positive!

I've started experiencing difficulty leaving home other than to do certain thing like nip to the shop at the bottom of the road, take my son to school (not even that now - it's the holidays, yay!) or go to the hospital and straight back - It feels rather pathetic really =(

have tried talking to my other half about alsorts in the couple of years we have been together and he is trying in his own way but I feel small, useless, stupid and embarraced by everything I want to talk to him about, pregnancy seems to be helping the resurfacing of some old demons too which has been really hard.

Terrified about the birth, getting support and understanding from my partner, being able to cope emotionally, oh yeah and we're looking for a new house to move into aswel....why not??!

Feeling lost, dazed and confused....

Is this normal??

Poor you. I suffer from anxiety too and know how hard it is.

You say you have problems with anxiety and PTSD - do you have healthcare professionals (eg a counsellor) already who you could discuss this with? Otherwise, might it be worth talking to your GP about it and let them know it's getting a bit much?

I think that pregnancy and househunting are stressful for pretty much everyone, so it's totally understandable that it all feels overwhelming - but tbh it doesn't really matter whether it's normal for most people or not. If you're really struggling, you need to talk to somebody about it and get some help coping. You might find that a chat with your GP about your worries makes you feel better. Or just an open, honest chat with your partner, without the kids around.

Don't be embarrassed - your feelings, whatever they are, are just as valid as anyone else's.

Mind have some good tips for dealing with anxiety.

Good luck.

Thankyou xx

I usually tend to be quite good at getting on with things but the combination of having so many big things happening at once - house and baby being the big two - is making it increasingly difficult to feel in control of anything at all, feels very confusing!!

As for speaking to the GP, am still waiting to hear back from him at the minute funnily enough - it takes an arm and a leg to get past the bulldog reception staff!! -however he tends to be quite understanding and helpful usually, unfortunatly the NHS has provided me with nothing but confusion over where to go or what to do other than make a phone call to their help service to have a chat when things are really bad which i haven't done for quite some time now - I end feeling bad for calling up eventually as the person on the other end is often very genuine and wants to help bbut the services they suggest are ones that I've already been to and so far have always said one of three things, we don't have the training or resources to help you deal with anxiety/PTSD/ADHD, you need to go and ring this number (call at your peril - you WILL be passed from person to person), or you've already tried everything that we offer through this service =(

Will try to speak to the midwives again maybe... And will have a look at MIND - no idea what resources or opportunities they offer but I'll try anything that doesn't involve downing a load of tablets!!

Thank you though =) xxx

I feel your pain. I'm half way through a very stressful and complex pregnancy. As it wasn't exactly planned, OH was less than pleased to hear the news, we were pretty shaky for a while. Then my dad was diagnosed with kidney cancer. I'm an only child so looking after him etc was all down to me. While all this was going on, I was getting intermittent HEAVY bleeds(still do now) so was terrified to leave the house incase these scary, uncontrollable gushes happened in the frozen aisle of asda! I still worry about going anywhere on my own now. Now the latest spanner is I have gestational diabetes. All I feel like doing is sitting in bed and eating chocolate and Big Macs! But alas, I'm not allowed!
I'm an anxious, worrier so this hasn't been an easy few months. Think I'm still in denial about the pregnancy( this will be our 3rd) as I've barely had time to think about it what with everything going on. Every now and again, the reality and enormity of the situation dawns in me and I go into a blind panic!
I'll get through the crappy bit, somehow. And so will you :)

Really sad to hear you feeling like this but I do understand pregnancy is very difficult I never thought it would be so hard a mixture of emotions and just trying to get through each day.

Your are not alone I have good and bad days

today has been a bad day but I strive for tomorrow that it will be a good day... if you cant get help from any services try to strive for little accomplishments like I do on a bad day

Todays accomplishment was getting changed and taking the dog for a walk sounds silly but half an hours fresh air is better than nothing yep I have sat on the sofa for the rest of the day because I feel heavy and horrible but at least I managed half an hour of something

try to strive for little goals... a little walk....a proper lunch.... a nice breakfast....a bath and see how it takes you

And keep talking about your feelings no one likes to feel alone