This is going to be very long winded (sorry) but i really need some help,
im 21 single and pregnant,
I spent the last three - four years having unprotected sex with my ex and because i never fell pregnant i assumed and so did he, that i struggled in that department. He doesnt, he has four children aging from 5 years all the way to 16.
However that relationship ended and i had a few flings nothing majour then my last fling happened, and to my suprise i found out i was pregnant
we only slept together twice really good friends and known eachother for years so the sexual side of it wasnt the biggest thing we just really got along.
my first initial thought was, im keeping the baby, i had an early scan due to come spotting and baby measured small but was too early to tell if the pregnancy was viable or not so 2 weeks later had to go for a follow up scan, it was a scary two weeks but was happy to see baby was fine.
however i then decide to tell my family the news, and it all became so real to me, im a student and havent got a penny to my name, i would receive 1200 a month in bennefits and a flat in my area is about 750 minimum unfurnished and before bills, then plus car food baby supplies etc, id be scraping by at best i would really struggle, iv never imagined bringing a baby into this world not being able to support him/her. and not in a relationship. I'm also only 21 i dont want to feel like im giving up my youth too early there so much i want to do, get a job finish college, travel etc..
all this sounds so selfish and foolish i know but im completely heartbroken. i know having an abortion will kill me inside and i will be so depressed for a long time, im not sure i'll ever get over it
i know the best thing for me would be to have an abortion, but im so scared that what if i cant concieve in the future what if there is actaully something wrong with me and i do struggle in that department, Im scared this may be my only chance.. im also scared that it would be foolish to attempt to raise a child when i know i cant give him/her the comfortable life they deserve..
i know i've been stupid and should have use contraception so please refrain from posting judgemental comments or anti abortion comments.
i myself never imagained i would EVER concider abortion, i'v always been against the idea but I suppose you never know what you would do until your in the situation and you feel how i feel right now.