how did you cope with 2? terrified

[omgherecomesno2]

would be grateful of other people's exsperiances and honesty please how did everyone cope with two children and a small age gap im nearly seven weeks pregnant with my second dc and my ds is only six months old so there will only be 14 months between them and im absolutely terrified that im not going to cope to the point its making me feel ill im fully aware its my own fault for not being protected but im so scared so please no negativity.

I'm terrified too. 14 month gap. Enjoying the next few months of relative ease

alot of people say its harder being pregnant with a young child then it is to have a toddler and a new born but im struggling to beleive that you im so scared x

Good morning , I have 2 dds similar age gaps , It can be hard going at times , I had a 15 month old when my 2nd dd arrived , she suffered from silent reflux so cried non stop for almost 4 months , I found it very tough for the 1st six months, but as baby gets a bit older , they started to play more , and I didn't feel so over whelmed,I now have a 1 year old and 27 month old , I have gotten into a good routine and its good , don't worry as long as both you and your kids are healthy , everything else will wait ,xx
Congratulations by the way xx

thats what im scared of my son is so good hes always happy and only ever cried when he was hungry or tired im scared the next one is going to be a screamer and I will just fall to peices

two was nice, a parent each when really needed, family day tickets usually 2 adults and two kids, It was really nice. loved it and I still do but it was a walk in the park compared to now. going from two to four is a whole other ballgame hahaha

It will be hard at times, invest in a sling or carrier for days when baby won't go down. Imo a must no matter what the age gap. For those who've never brought a baby home when they have older ones, be prepared for your older ones to look huge all of a sudden, it can be hard to remember their still babies themselves.

thanks for the replies but im still terrified

I have a friend with a 13 month gap. I didn't know her until her younger one was 2, but by that point she utterly loved it. They are now just school age and so close. She says she barely remembers the first year and that it was a bit chaotic. But she said now it is lovely because they are at the same stage, so picking family outings, etc is easy.

If it helps dd was a dream baby and when ds arrived he was even easier (if that's possible! ) It is possible to have 2 'easy' babies x

Welli find what maya Angelou helpful, ' life is hard, but that is okay, you can take it'. It will be hard but you will get through.
I found that my stress levels in my first trimester were out of control so you may find your anxieties ease as your pregnancy progresses. I am pg with second and I am not even going to think about what life will be like with two until I am passed the hormonal surge of first trimester.
And you have the benefit of one easy baby. Count that as a help and
And if it is any consolation, adults I know with small age gaps between siblings say it is great.

I appreciate all the replies but its not just that my relationship isnt great he hardly does anything I dont think we would survive the pregnancy let alone another baby I just dont want to end up a single parent to two children living back at my mums house I live with him so it would be me that woupd have to move out I dont have finacial stability and im only 22 the stress of it all makes me feel sick

Wow that is tough. Do you think your relationship has a long term future even if you stayed at only one child? From the bit of insight you have given it sounds like ending up as a single parent at your mum's is a possibility even if you stay at one child?
At least you do have your mum as a resource. What is your relationship like with her?
You have some hard thinking to do. Where I live the sexual health clinic offers free counselling to pregnant women to help them think through their options. Maybe you could see if your area does the same?
You are still young. Even if you do end up at your mum's you still have a lot of time to forge a life for yourself. You'll only be my age by the time your kids have grown up for example!

we've been together since I was 18 so I would already say it was long term but things have gradually got worse hes very short tempered and a stress head I cant be doing with it as if I dont have a enough stress on my plate no I dont think it will survive with just one child hes all over the place like jackle and hyde I cant figure him out from one day to the next I find my self eager to get away from him most days although I love him I cant deal with him and yes my mum is brilliant we have a great relationship but I dont want to compromise that either by moving back in I just dont no witch way is up at the moment

I am sorry things are so tough for you. If you have a brilliant relationship with your mum I am sure she will help you by having you live with her if you need it. It is good there is that option even if it is not ideal. I guess there is always the option of relationship counselling with dp but you will have to thnk about whether you think that will work. Your dp would have to be committed to it too.
Often in life there is not one good option with no downsides and you just have to decide what is the better of the options you have.

If you really think a second baby at this time will be too much, it's still early days and you can see your GP and talk it over. You have a choice about how to go forward.

If you have a good relationship with your mum, that's great, and rather than moving in with her, you could make an arrangement where she comes over and helps you for 2 or 3 hours every day, at least in the first few weeks?
It will be hard but you can totally do it, just make sure you get plenty of support, from people like your mum, friends, baby groups etc. make sure you have a shoulder to cry on when it gets hard. You'll be much tougher than you realise so don't be down on yourself! It looks impossible but it's been done before, and when the babies are a bit older and able to play together and be pals that's when the pressure on you can ease off a little.
Take care and remember that pregnancy hormones can make you feel even worse!

13 months one week here. they are now all growed up at nearly 19 and 20. first year with two is definitely hard going, you effectively have twins but they both need different things at the same time. However it can be done! there are definite advantages a couple of years down the line, when they are at similar stages and will probably enjoy doing the same things. accept every offer of help you are given but honestly you will be fine and get through it I promise. when I found out I was pregnant again I was really anxious about having to go through it all again so soon and how I would cope etc etc, but felt much better once the baby arrived (and she was a screamer and would only breast feed and co sleep till 10 months) and just got on with it. Looking back, I wouldn't have it any other way. very best of luck to you xx