Would DS be allowed in the ambulance if i had to transfer?

[JellyBeansHaveNoAgeLimit]

Am planning a home birth but just thinking of a contingency plan.

My mum lives in the next road over from the hospital. If i need to transfer I am assuming this would be via ambulance? If so would they allow DH & 2yo DS to travel with me? DH could then take DS to my mums and hopefully get back in time for the birth!

We don't drive & neither does my mum but i have a feeling they won't allow DS to travel with us.

No, we aren't friendly with any of our neighbours & all our friends live 40 or so mins away. I've never actually left ds with anyone before which is probably why i am more comfortable keeping him here if possible. Leaving him at my mums is the best option logistically because she's so close to the hospital otherwise i might have called on a friend but i feel like that's a big ask when they all have young ds as well.

Speaking as a paramedic.....

It depends on the situation. If you are transferring as a failure to progress with no urgency then the MW will probably drive their own car leaving the Ambulance free to take your H and son and to amble in without lights and sirens. My trust have ambulances with rear seats that convert to child seats.

If it's an obstetric emergency or any other cause for concern there will only be room for the MW and one other passenger. This still might only be a bimble journey but there will be no room for either your H or son. Make plans for your son to be picked up or cared for.

I would happily drive 40mins to collect a friend's child when she was in labour, day or night. I would also step in to help a neighbour i barely knew. I bet there are loads of people who'd be honoured tp help if they knew what a spot youre in.

Must depend on the area. Where I work we have to go in the ambulance even if its failure to progress.

I am glad i asked this question as I've realised i have been planning for best case scenario! I think i will ask friends to take ds if i labour in the day & get dh to take ds via taxi if i need to transfer. If i labour at night i will just leave ds asleep & i think he would sleep through.

My last labour was 4hrs so in any case i doubt ds would be away from me for long!

They don't here, and they don't allow children in delivery suite either. maybe check with your midwife but I doubt it.

As others have said, no, no one but the patient generally goes in the ambulance. Certainly not children. Most likely not your DH. If you need a post-delivery transfer and both of you need to go, they send two ambulances. If only you need to go, the baby also needs to follow with your DH.

Most delivery suites will not allow any children, even if you turn up with them.

I know children aren't allowed in the delivery suite, i meant he would be picked up as soon as i moved to the ward or discharged.

It must be different in each area because as I said above I had a post delivery transfer and me , baby and dh were all taken in the ambulance.

Oh, I see

But he won't be allowed in the ambulance should you need to transfer. They need to concentrate on their patient and everything is cramped anyway.

Emily - Was your baby in need of medical attention too? I was told before my homebirth that, in my area, they certainly wouldn't allow a mother and baby both in need of a transfer in the same ambulance as there is only one paramedic in the back and she/he can't be looking after both of you simultaneously. Though in that situation they would allow DH and baby in an ambulance and me in another. I can see that if the baby is just (in the nicest possible way) tagging along it might vary more by area.

I had a home birth last year, laboured through the night and DD was born about 9am. DS (4) woke up at 7.30, we parked him in front of Toy Story and he watched all three films back to back. About 11am I transferred into hosp due to my third stage going a bit wrong. I went with baby and MW in the ambulance, DH stayed to settle our babysitter in (our lovely cleaner as it happens), and then got to hosp in our car about half an hour after I did.

The MWs were completely unfazed by DS being in the house and he was unfazed by the sight of me in the pool (he had seen it blown up for the practice run some days before and we had explained). I had also prepared him for the possible need to transfer. While in the final hour of labour, between pushing contractions, there was a brilliant moment when it all went silent, but something funny happened in the film. Hearing my big boy giggle gave me a happy feeling and evidently a rush of oxytocin because the contraction that followed was HUGE!

I had to stay in the hospital overnight in the end. DH was back and forth from the house and it was all rather not what we had wanted. So you might also think about not just the immediate babysitting but whether your DS might need someone to stay with for 24h or more. As a fully worst case scenario I mean.

hope you have a completely uneventful and calm birth though and that all this is moot!

No he wasn't. It was just me with a bad tear and large baby had sent me into (medical) shock.

Yes, just to add a happy comment, there is really nothing like your bigger child(ren) waking up in the morning and meeting their new sibling whilst still in their pj's.

Emily - Oh gosh, poor you. It does make sense that policy on that sort of transfer might vary. I can see that the other sort is more of a medical necessity issue rather than a policy one.

For DD2 hospital birth - DD1 was just 6 and staying with neighbour/friend.
Took her there at 11pm as was having regular contractions and didn't want to disturb them in the middle of the night ...
As it was that stage took forever ...I was there after school the next day ...so we thought a good idea for her to pop in and say hello for an hour or so ...
It so wasn't - having really strong contractions every 6 mins - couldn't hide the pain - first one when she was there and I managed to keep it to a wince and that really upset her - mummy in pain ...rest I was clock watching so I could disappear out the room for them (DP distracted her!) - so I really wouldn't recommend it ...

Well i imagining if ds is at home whilst i am labouring the midwife can support me & husband can be with DS. He really is a very laid back child & i was pretty quiet in labour last time so i think he'd be ok staying in the house but i do realise the need for a contingency just in case.

My husband was allowed in the ambulance with me after my surprise home birth, thankfully my DD slept through the racket and we'd got my mum staying over to look after her (with minutes to spare before baby arrived !)

I didn't actually want this to be a home birth (I did with DD1), I had considered it but I was reminded that there needed to be another adult available to care for DD1 and that my husband couldn't support me fully and be expected to do child care - esp If labour was during the day time.

I was allowed in ambulance once when my sister was taken ill with both our young children as it was an emergency and paramedics were helpful with this but given your husband will be there I would have thought they'd say no.

Jelly - what is your hospitals' visiting policy? Bear in mind that DC may only be allowed in for a couple of hours in the afternoon but that your DP will probably be allowed in for more than that and, depending on the type of labour you have had and how the baby is, you may want your DP in hospital with you.
I don't want to scare you but I was in a similar position as we'd moved just before DC2 was born and knew very few people locally. DD did go to nursery so an extra day there was my daytime plan and the nighttime plan was to walk down the street hammering on doors until a neighbour took pity on me and agreed to look after DC1! I didn't think many people would turn down a woman in active labour.

This thread has got me thinking, If I was out and had an emergency and needed to be taken in an ambulance, what would they do with my children?

And surely the no children in the hospital rule can't be right? Surely they cannot turn you away? I thought most hospitals let two people in at least?

I was planning for the eventuality that my elder would need to be the midwife - certainly it could easily happen for a woman to labour rapidly with older children.

Ida - They don't let children into delivery, even if they allow two people. Who is meant to be looking after the child? (Obviously probably different if the child is 15 and looks adult).

If you turned up with an adult and a child, they would likely ask them both to wait in the waiting area/café. If you had to be taken in on your own they obviously wouldn't leave the children home alone though, and would muddle through.

Sorry haven't read all the comments. no your kid would not be allowed and I highly doubt your husband would; if your being transferred it is classed as an emergency, there will only be room for medical staff in the ambulance - you, child (if already born), midwife and paramedics.

I speak from experience, I was transferred and my husband had to make his own way. All good in the end though!

If my son isn't allowed in the hospital at all then we have accepted that DH will have to leave me. Not ideal but i would rather DS was with his dad than anyone else.

On a happier note, i asked my group of friends if they would mind taking him for a play date if i labour in the day & have had 5 people say yes

Great news on the play dates. Knew that the volunteers would appear.

Jelly I had lots of other parents at the school - even people I didn't know very well - telling me if I was stuck to call them anytime - they would look after DD1 for me! I think most other parents in an emergency would watch someone else's DCs for them - not ideal but...
I was admitted to hospital (not pregnancy related) as an emergency ...luckily DP was around for for DD but really difficult for him and at the time I didn't know anyone locally and my family were minimum 5 hrs away... was told that social services would take DD as a short term foster if absolutely nec....