Can stress harm baby?

[AuntieBrenda]

I'm 18 weeks and going through a lot of emotional stress, work stress and attempting to move house.
I'm so worried I'm harming my baby. I've not felt movement yet - I think. I don't know, I can't remember whet it was like. I have a DS aged 3.
I'm just really worried that my baby will be harmed with all this stress and constant busy ness.

Sorry to hear you are having a tough time. I think there are long term studies that suggest stress might be a a factor in things like slightly reduced performance at school etc but consider a, this must be incredibly hard to prove b, stress can mean a lot of different things hopefully your issues are short term, and c, you don't need more stress by worrying about this. Be kind to yourself as much as you can.

Sorry you are having a tough time, I asked this Q a few months back, we lost my beautiful MIL & work was becoming incredibly stressful, I had lots of lovely responses the one that stuck in my head was to think about the women in war zones who go on to birth healthy children it's a depressing thought really but made me think babbas really well protected inside us. I wouldn't ponder too much about it & just try & do what you can to look after yourself.

This obviously isn't a definitive answer, but the DC I have which I was most stressed during pregnancy, is my happiest, calmest child.

My most anxious, (and difficult) child arrived after the loveliest/calmest pregnancy, and his early years were practically perfect in every way. His birth was long and painful (for me) - so that's what I tend to blame his personality on.

I don't think babies are harmed by busyness, and seem very resilient to stress.

Many women have babies after losses or with health issues and are therefore under constant stress (because they are pregnant!). The advice is that there is little evidence this harms the baby.
Postwar they would advise very strongly that stress harmed babies because they were told to: they needed to get women out of the workplace to provide jobs for men, and it was mid baby boom ... this has led to a social belief any stress harms babies.

Babies are definitely not harmed by being busy. Extremely high levels of fear and stress can affect birth according to some studies BUT...

It would be very constant levels of cortisol/fight-or-flight reactions over many months which - for obvious reasons trials and surveys are thin on the ground, but the one most often brought out is the effect of living in 'tornado alley' during tornado season in inadequately safe housing, or having had their house blown away on pregnancy. It is controversial because of course they couldn't rule out other factors such as nutrition etc' and the ladies were likely to be poor etc'.

Thanks for all your replies - I know it's irrational! I was thinking about war zone mums etc and I know I'm being silly. I just feel like hiding away with my son at the moment and getting off the world for a bit! I may go and speak to my gp as I think this may be my anxiety / depression coming back.

You have all made me see a bit of sense though - thank you xx

I think there are studies indicating that stress isn't good for the baby - though I'm sure all these are 0.5% chance of bad outcome increasing to 0.7% or something like that...

But remember stress isn't good for you either. Take care of yourself and the baby bit will come naturally.

Now it's easier to say stop stressing than actually stop stressing... but force a bit of time in your life (lean on other people for a bit - I'm sure there's someone who can take a little pressure off) and try out different ways to help yourself. For some people that's mindfulness techniques, for some people a new hobby (Candy Crush, Loom Bands, Grand Theft Auto - whatever - needs only be 20mins), for some people the GP can help.

One thing that's certain is stressing about stressing definitely doesn't help!

good luck.

though I'm sure all these are 0.5% chance of bad outcome increasing to 0.7% or something like that

Yes and to some extent it's like those 'perception of crime' and confidence surveys limiting behaviour: some people answer because their perception has been affected by the past, some because they actually live in a dangerous area.
How do we know whether the stress or the cause of the stress caused issues IYSWIM?

Certainly they have found no link with women pregnant after miscarriage and stillbirth (the one survey where they can directly correlate what is stress and what is a different medical issue, and where almost all women are stressed when pregnant without non-pregnancy MH issues).
They have found some links to stress around birth and childhood stress/behaviour: but again it's nature/nurture. Stressed out mum is likely to still be like that with her child, so it's hard to tell.

My doctor said 'happy you, happy baby' when I was mentioned to him that I was stressed due to workload, moving house and every pregnancy symptom going! He advised that I take some time out, which is what I did and felt much much better for it. If you can take time off work, it may be worth considering, I'm sure your baby will be just fine, but if you can take some time out, do it for your own wellbeing.

I'm glad I did.

Hope you get to relax soon!

the same happened to me as Hasle157 and i feel tons better for it, sleeping much better etc. I can certainly recommend it.
this has been quite possibly the most stressful year of my & OH's lives - his dad died, then his mum got burgled, then in a car crash, his only sister/sibling has decided to leave her husband and child and move overseas, we moved house, squatters ruined his old house that he rents now as we now rent elsewhere, i started a new really stressful job not knowing i was pregnant so don;t get mat leave (after having a chilled out good job for 7 years...), and lots of other things.
i keep breathing (!!), listening to music i like, go to yoga and swimming and try to have as much fun with friends as possible and OH and I are just being ostrichs and deciding that worrying won't make any difference.... easier said than done!
In a way having this baby is the best thing as I've decided a) there is never the right time and there would always be stress happening, b) other people in the world - as has been mentioned - live in awful circumstances and thank god i don't c) this baby is really a silver lining and something really positive to look forward to for us and others.

good luck. just take it easy where and whenever you can. my sister gave me some good advice - don't stand if you can sit, don't sit when you can lie, don't lie when you can sleep! i'm using that approach to life!!

I have had the most stressful pregnancy ever, my sister died when I was 20 weeks, with lots of minor stresses, work, spd, sickness, we are trying to buy a house etc. I am now 30 weeks and although I'm muddling though all the checks on the baby is fine and she is wriggling about like anything!