possesiveness...?

[divastrop]

i cant spell at the mo but i was wondering if any other women have found themselves becoming overly-possesive of their dh/dp in pregnancy?i am just entering the 2nd trimester and feeling insecure all of a sudden,i keep checking to see if dp is looking at attractive women walking down the street etc.there is no logical reason for these feelings,i just wondered if it was normal?

I would say anythig in pg is 'normal' given that we all behave so abnormally .

With my 1st I felt just the same once I started to really show, found myself moving to hold hands a lot more etc. He only had eyes for me tho'. With subsequent pg I think I got into the idea of thinking well everyone knows we've had sex recently so he still has eyes for me, IYSWIM (see what I mean freaky pg thoughts)
My Dh has categorically not turned his head tho' I know it's not in his nature. He wouldn't know if someone was coming onto him if they began a lap dance in Marksies, he's that clueless.
Do you think you have cause to worry or is it just the irrational pg hormones talking?

Sounds totally normal to me. Turned into a complete basket case when pregnant with my dd - for some bizarre reason thought my dp had been transformed into Brad Pitt and every hot young thing was after a piece of him Didn't occur to me that it was anything to do with pregnancy at the time, novice that I was.... Was lucky enough 2nd time round to have my best friend pregnant at the same time we would meet up for coffee and discuss our latest 'PP's'(pregnancy paranoias)

Does your Dp not look at other women normally? Bust mine all the time, he says he has to check to see if anyone is as attractive as me!!!! Cheeky buggar

Is good to have an outlet though, preferably not your dp, unless you can laugh about it, that way it's easier to get things in perspective...

my dp doesnt look at other women that ive noticed,maybe the odd glance if a woman walks down the street wearing practically nothing but only in the same way he glances at lads wearing make up or other things that would catch anybody's eye?!he says nice things all the time ie that im beautiful etc i think it may be because hes 6 years younger than me,or maybe its to do with negative experiences of being pg in the past(my ex,father of ds and dd1 was nasty and would regularlt point out women on the telly or in the street he found attractive,and make comments such as 'mmm shes got nice tits'etc,whilst telling me i was fat and lucky to have him).
maybe its just my bad attitude to men that i think once a woman has served her purpose(ie,hes sowed hhis seed in her)the man will start looking for the next one....
ok,im nuts
i agree with needing an outlet for the pp's,luckily i'm managing to keep my mouth shut most of the time

Hope it's not getting you down too much, never too far away if you need to let out some PP's, it really is better to get them out, I was so paranoid when pregnant with my first I didn't say anything to my dp, just behaved like a nutter, poor buggar didn't know what was going on - we laugh about it now but it did put a big strain on our relationship at the time....

Think the most important thing is if you do have an irrational outburst, say sorry afterwards - again I found this v hard as in my warped hormonal mind there had to be something behind my suspicions.

It's fab that you're aware of it though shouldn't get out of hand that way, it will be funny one day....

Second trimester is funny time too, it can feel a bit neither one way or the other - do you get a nice bump? I just spread and don't really look pregnant until 7mths just chubby til then as my babies seem to grow in my arse, arms and thighs as well as my tummy - iykwim

I felt exactly the same during my pregnancy nad it caused quite a few rows. I was very oversensitive about that kind of thing. I put it down to the fact that i was now always sober when we went out so I noticed more but also that i felt a little self concious re my change in body etc to all the super slim people that were about - stupid I know but luckily dp understood!!!

no ive never had a nice little bump,its always depended on the make of baby,the girls grew in my bum and thighs and with the boys i just got fat all over.its really silly cos with the last 2 ive lost all the weight within 4 months but i still feel unattractive while hes walking round still looking exactly the same.when i have tried talking to him he gets upset thinking that i dont want to have his baby,he doesnt understand that its not the baby ive got a problem with,i just wish i could skip the pregnancy part.
i do remember feeling better from about 7 months when i actually looked pg rather than just fat,its this middle bit where i go a bit psycho.
im so glad other ppl have had the same feelings,i was starting to belive my own thoughts,thats why i posted on here.

I've just had the opposite! DH woke up this morning in a cold sweat after having a dream that a friend had persuaded ME to leave HIM. I'm 34 weeks, and he has told me that he thinks I look lovely and is much less bothered by my (so far small) stretch marks than me.
Having said that, I made him promise recently that he wouldn't leave me for someone who hadn't given birth if I tore really badly.
And I spent yesterday in tears for no reason.... lovely hormones eh?

no I don't find that, you can have mine at the mo I've gone off all sex and can't be bothered being pawed. I even resent his side of the bed being taken up some nights.

I'm definitely more paranoid - for example in the air port check queue I got a bit sulky because this woman kept really staring at my DP (he's really good looking and i'm normally used to it)....luckily dps 14yr old daughter kept hugging him and it put the woman off lol .

love Tallie xx

Im not like that!! ive gone off sex and most things about my partner really annoy me and the moment! he does look at women when we're out shopping or out with friends, but they are welcome to him at the moment!! ive only 3 weeks left so im sure this will pass! for sake anyway because i can be really nasty! oops!!!!

hmmmm...when i was pg with ds2(he has a different father) i went off sex at about 25 weeks and didnt give a c**p if my ex-husband looked at anybody.trouble is,it stayed the same afterwards and i threw him out and filed for divorce when ds2 was 4 months old!
so it maybe the combination of hormones,unpleasant past experiences and the fact that dp is younger than me.
thanks to everyone 4 ur replies xxx

Oh i am soo ashamed to write this but want to share it with you because you are not going mad i promise

When i was pg with my ds i got to about 4 months pg & i was like a women possessed honestly i turned into a living nightmare, i was that bad that dp & i nearly split because he could not take anymore of my totally out of control behaviourer

I just could not help it every women & everything was annoying me, we used to go out & everywhere we went i used to say he was looking at women, i could not even bear the thought of him watching films with naked women or sex scenes, i hated him reading the newspaper, i turned into a nightmare & it was the worst experience of my life, it was something i could not control & we did not tell anyone, be we fought & rowed constantly, i cried & got angry & it went on & on.

Dp never wanted anymore children because he said he could NEVER go through it again he was devastated at what had happened

When we finally decided we were going to try for no 2 i remember when we got the pos test & dp used to phone me from work everyday to make sure i had not "lost control" because he was so worried, thank god it never happened 2nd time round with dd because our relationship would be well & truly over.

So your not mad but i was