Last week the midwife told me I am borderline obese

[Decaferine]

Not explicitly, but with a BMI of 29 I did recieve the information about not gaining too much, eating non-fattening but nutritious food and such.
That was last week and I have been stewing over the weekend, wondering how the fuck I've managed to put on so much weight at only 8 weeks pregnant, feeling worried and fairly ashamed.
So, getting my notes out today, I work it out from the midwife's figures. My BMI is not 29. It is 24, meaning I am not even overweight!
I would have to weigh over two stones more to have a bmi of 29.

I am ticked off because having had an eating disorder in the past (which the midwife knew about), I still find it really difficult to accurately assess my own weight and how acceptable it is in terms of health.

An planning to mention it at my next appointment, but just needed a vent here!

Presumably she meant borderline overweight and had a slip of the tongue. Eating issues regardless, it was a minor slip up. Give her a break.

She was a very nice midwife and I am not going to go in all-guns blazing but it does need mentioning surely?
Unfortunately, a BMI of 30 is obese, so 29 is borderline obese. I was fairly worried as my pre-preg bmi was normal but I knew I had gained a few pounds already.

Yes but the midwife told her 29 not 24.

Your BMI should have been calculated on your pre pregnancy weight. It then doesnt need to be calculated again until after giving birth. It wont be accurate if recalculated during pregnancy as BMI doesnt allow for baby, placenta, amniotic fluid etc.
I would mention it to midwife just to say "are you sure thats right coz i worked it out as this" but not push the issue.

24 BMI is not even borderline overweight. When you're in the average range, going up "1" (rather than 0. something) takes a good few pounds. I know from my past (orthorexia - desperate to get down to 7 stone to try to get my BMI bang on 18)... which incidentally was healthy only on paper, I looked like skin and bones. I am 24 at 8 1/2 stone now, 25 would be over 9 stone: on my height that's not borderline, you'd notice the difference!

Eating issues regardless, it was a minor slip up.
I would take slight issue about this. If someone has a real issue with their eating a small comment like this could be a massive trigger.

Mental health (especially with eating) is a problem which can impact on pregnancy quite heavily: HCPs do need to be careful not to 'trigger' a pregnant woman with their language: just because it is mental not physical health doesn't mean it's no big deal. Imagine if the disordered eating was recent: some women (not necessarily the OP) might start dieting secretly after this exchange, affecting their health during pregnancy - or worse binge/purging (which could easily be excused as morning sickness).
Poor mental health during pregnancy can lead to PND.

So although the MW did not do anything on purpose and to her it was 'minor', depending on the patient it could have massive ramifications.

Decaferine to be quite honest I would run this past her supervisor, OK not deliberate but for someone who has not fought their demons potentially dangerous. Otherwise I would politely maybe phone her and clarify, explaining your past history. Given that it was on her notes she should realise.

Did she calculate the BMI herself or did the computer system tell her what it was? Because in my case all my details were put in the system and that spat out my BMI...

The whole BMI system is outdated and ridiculous and I seriously resent it for causing body fascism amongst women.

My BMI was measured at 29, I'm a size twelve and run forty miles a week as well as working on the farm during evenings and weekends with my husband. My stomach is as flat as a pancake and I'm all ass and boobs at 5'5.

I'm not entirely sure just what she said as you say not explicitly.

Unless she actually said 'borderline obese' I wouldn't be worried or offended so don't worry about it, it's her job and she HAS to say about not putting on too much weight. I got exactly the same spool, even whilst she acknowledged my muscle mass, exercise and ridiculed the system.

Just bring it up next time you see her and get it changed in your book, no biggy.

What EXACTLY did she say...

Squizita, I would really feel terrible mentioning it to her supervisor-she was very kind and thorough with everything else- but am definitely going to get it changed on my notes!
I am more annoyed with myself for not checking it before. Aunt Maggie- She used a little handheld calculator thing; I'm guessing she just read it incorrectly. Donkle, I fully agree with you about the BMI system. You sound very fit, so it would be completely inaccurate for you and a lot of people, I guess. She didn't mention anything like 'borderline obese'. She just quietly noted the number and moved onto the healthy eating talk, but I am familiar with the BMI system and know that 30 is technically obese, so was sitting there thinking 'shit'. Another thing that did occur to me was thait had been a 5 point difference between say 30 and 35, that could have meant to difference between me being allowed a water birth or needing extra care because of risks associated with morbid obesity, so it is important that they get it right.

Of course it is but I'm sure it's probably just a typo and she was giving you the generic talk that's compulsory, I'm sure if you mention it first thing next time she'll apologise.

Hope your pregnancy goes smooth and congratulations.

I recently went to a dietician and, I shit you not, his scales added 10 kg. it's that ir the scales at the GP, at the gym and my Wii console are all wrong

It also seems weird that she didn't notice that you (presumably) don't look borderline obese, or that the weight itself wasn't high - you'd have thought she'd have been surprised by the BMI and recalculated it!

My friend was lectured about her waist measurement being 33 inches- this was not whilst pregnant. She went home and checked and found her waist 23 inches like normal. Makes you fear for the complex stuff when they fuck up the easy parts.

I think the important thing is that you feel healthy - if you're concerned about a potential health problem, I would discuss it with her. If you know that you're not overweight, perhaps mention that the discussion last time left you feeling a little anxious as you don't feel unhealthy, and could she clarify the reading for you? I'm sure she will be mortified to have made you feel so worried.

My midwife said "this shows you can be healthy and overweight!" When she said I had perfect blood pressure at my booking in appt. I decided to take it as a compliment I am a size 14-16 though! They are fine with me because I've only gained a stone by 29 weeks (probably because I couldn't eat without throwing up in first trimester, I lost a bit to begin with). I have to say I don't get too fussed with medical professionals mentioning weight, they have to but a lot of them are no thinner than me so I know they aren't judging. Annoying for you that she got the BMI wrong though!

While not pregnant I had a nurse tell me I was 'borderline' after weighing me... I was wearing size 10 French Connection skinny jeans at the time (so not a 'generous' size 10) and the nurse must have been a size 18 at least, so I took her stupid comment with a pinch of salt. Annoyed me though! This BMI business doesn't seem to be foolproof.

People in health care really should be more careful when talking about weight, certainly when they are aware of previous or current mental health issue. Especially at a time when someone may feel more vulnerable/sensitive than usual. I have had several triggering experiences steming from comments from midwives and a HV. They were lovely people just not well versed in dealing with people with eating disorders I guess.

Can we please stop thinking if you're 29 BMI you must 'look borderline obese' or being teenagers about a plus size midwife.

It's their freaking job FFS, they have to tell us all about our weight and diet, I'm sure they're entitled to be whatever size they want and for god sake I'm sorry but it's the smallest deal in the world and is probably just a ridiculous error which will be easily fixed.

This is exactly what I mean about BMI calculations causing body fascism amongst women. My mother is anorexic and was in hospital most my childhood, my sister has body dysmorphia and I also have my fair shares of demons....

But do I want my midwife to tell me the associated risks? YES. Do I care if a professional tells me I'm borderline obese? NO. Would I criticise my midwife for being larger than me? NO. Am I offended that she didn't double check it because 'I don't look borderline'? NO, because I'm not 13.

Coooooome onnnn!

Plus... We've already established she didn't say 'borderline obese' so it's not even an issue about a midwife needing to adapt her language to become more sensitive.

The devils in the detail...

Donkle the key thing is she told someone with a former eating disorder that they were completely the wrong weight. Therefore she wasn't actually giving the right advice about what/how much to eat on a technical basis (triggering aside. I've had minor relapses caused by inaccurate body fat measurements - just because you shrug these comments off doesn't make them risk free for everyone). The OP linking thee calculation error to being labelled "obese" would suggest it is a raw point for her too.