SMP... just found out i'm not going to get it... just a bit of a moan :-( (sorry VERY long!!)

[frannie2013]

Hi - the last 6 months have been pretty stressful so just need a moan as just found out that i don't qualify for the 6 weeks at 90% pay and i'm gutted as that cash was going to be my 'breather' money whilst off - i'm one week off it... nothing i can do.

basically i moved to a new job in mid dec after being somewhere for 7 years as i was bored and offered a new opportunity. basically it hasn't turned out quite like they said and people are pretty horrid there and the work is dull as. however early jan i found out i was expecting, which came as quite a lovely shock to me and OH but quite happy as we thought it would take ages (we are both 38) though i knew the timing was hardly ideal work wise... I did a test online for benefits and clearly did it wrong as i thought it said that i'd qualify...

I've worked my ass off despite nothing ever being good enough. some days - like 2x a week - i've worked 13 hours and still have too much to do. someone in my team has been off sick for 6 weeks and is trying to claim it's my fault (via pre-tribunal) as she is under-performing... she was underperforming when i arrived just her previous manager was rubbish so i've 'inherited' her.

I've said to OH and others that if i wasn't pregnant i'd have got another job months ago but thought i should stay, have baby and then decide what the options are.

I've done finances carefully (we have a really complicated situation) and cut back loads as i wanted to try to take a year off and now realised that that 6 weeks was going to be the difference between relaxing a bit about money or not. now i'm super stressed and been crying all evening. I'm amazed how much of a difference it will make.

I've not told OH yet as in the week i work 400 miles away and he is out tonight with mates and i don't want him to have a shit evening but he is going to be a bit stressed about this as i'm the main bread winner. (he does have a good job and work hard though!)

for example As well as the usual things we need to buy (though most we are being given/leant) i need to buy a car (insurance etc etc) as whilst i'm off i will need one as where we live together is really rural and i'll go mad in the house all day/trying to get the bus service that is rubbish. My initial budget was £3,500 but now it's going to have to be less than £2k.

on top of the new job, in January squatters finally moved out of OH's property (we rent elsewhere whilst we decide where we are going to buy somewhere together) and had trashed the place so we had to sort that out. then in Feb OH's dad got ill on holiday and passed away at home in March. in April OH's mum got burgled and now his sister is wanting to leave her DH and do a 'shirley valentine' (yes, with a waiter she met when she visited poorly dad... I jest not...). There are other things too not related to his family...!

I hate that it is making me so stressed when i should be so happy about this baby. i'm thinking of cancelling all social plans to just try to save more money but i know that will just make me more miserable now.

Sorry for the moan and if i come across really horrid. writing it all down has been quite helpful. i'm sure a decent night sleep will help...

Can't cab help, and although its no imediate child tax credits benefits will help, statutory maternity pay is statutory just means the job center will pay it not ur employer, friend at work didn't qualify for it so job center paid smp hope it helps!

Would you not qualify for maternity allowance instead?

Thts what its called thanku! Maternity allowance, looked on website, u qualify for smp as long as u have been at employment at least a week before u found / become pregnant and earn over £102 a week, if u dnt qualify for that for any reason u get maternity allowance if u have worked 26 weeks in the last 66 and earnd over £30 weach week, also its gives u £130 a week or 90% of wages what ever is lower both entitled for 39 weeks!

hi
yes will get Mat allowance (c. £136) which is great but won't get the 6 weeks at 90% which just feels really frustrating and unfair as the timings are just one week out. and that money would make such a difference. Told OH in the end and he was great but i know he is going to be worried too.
thanks for all your help.

Are you starting your mat leave as late as possible? I worked until 39 weeks both times, and it didn't really feel like a struggle. Sorry if that's a daft question.

It sucks but all you can do is try and save more now. I don't qualify for SMP either and it is worrying to cope on so much less money but the upside is that when you have the baby life's cheap as you're not exactly going out a lot.

thanks. i've got 20 days holiday to take before DD so i'm looking forward to that!
also my weekly commute is 400 miles - which is just beginning to get a bit uncomfortable - and we want the baby born in our home hospital and not where i work so i'm hoping that 4 weeks will be long enough!

I can relate to how you feel. It is the unexpected realisation of things not going to plan. In my case I found out that I would qualify for MA as I'm a PhD student (so even though I "work" full time it is not classified as real work). I was a stressed out mess when I found out as it means our finances will be really tight while I'm off. However, a few weeks later once the news had settled in, I realised it was not worth worrying about. I still get into a bit of a panic every now and again but I just remind myself we will survive.

That should be that I would not qualify for MA.

could you move your maternity leave forward one week? ie instead of breaking of on X date break of a week later? also the 90% of earnings might not be as much as what you think it will be as Stat Mat is £136 a week OR 90% of earnings - whichever is the lower amount. I know its crap but don't worry too much, baby is more important than money anyway and sometimes I think people often exaggerate what a baby costs