am I being unreasonable?

[Geminiwitch22]

Sorry if this appears to be a rant but I need to get off my chest.
I currently live my dhs mom she's disabled supposedly with several conditions however refuses too see a doc about them and when she does they fob her off. She lost her hubby 18 months ago so they're blaming depression. She's refusing to try new meds and getting emotional. This is obviously not helping me at almost 35 weeks pregnant with a baby I only had 5-10% of having, if I feel tearful she starts crying and she is currently leaning on me heavily as I'm on mat leave and now going to a grievance meeting this afternoon. Every time my pregnancy is mentioned she days I'm handling it so well but I can't show emotion a as it sets her off which lasts for days, or she and my partner family ignore me and go on about their pregnancies which are nothing like mine. I've had 7 scans several obstetric appointments oh and monitoring last week (this caused her to have a panic attack and call her daughter thinking I was miscarriage instead of asking my permission) dat doesn't help is when anyonenyshe is causing me and eh to argue almost weekly. The last big one was that I refused to leave the baby with her when she refuses to get up to make a cup of tea. We have explained that until her pain and diabetes is under control I cannot risk the baby, I spent 2 days cleaning and found rotting fruit under her chair! I am worried if a midwife or social services see this they will take my baby away. I cannot afford to move but if this carries on in going to crack.
Any advice is much appreciated (including slaps). Sorry about the long post.

At the end of the day, it seems like you are under a lot of pressure at the moment, doing something that you "shouldn't" really have to do. The health and well being of your baby are paramount.

I don't have any experience with this sort of thing, other than when my dad and I had to look after my grandma. There was little to no support from family or docs. In the end I phoned social services to see if they could help. I didn't want to but in the end they were amazing and helped us get the help we needed.

IMO you are NOT being unreasonable and you need some help.

Sounds very hard.

Why is it that you are still living with her?

Do to think that you and your partner living with her enables her to continue like this?

Thanks Mrsmonkeybear.
The Dudess we cannot afford to move out right now due to money, but she has said more than once we wouldn't get anything until baby is here. She supposedly has been like this ever since her hubby died but the family promised to look after her as a result most of it has landed on my shoulders but rumours have been flying the family don't like me and I trapped th in the relationship.

She needs help! Its not her fault but the grief is too much for her to deal with and you dont need the added stress! Drag her down the docs and tell them she needs sorting! And shes more than depressed! Its turned her into somebody she isnt. And your other half needs to stand up and be a man by taking her himself. Tell the doctor shes a liabillty to her own health and your fearing for her life they have the right to section someone if need be. You all cant go on living like that and if shes refusing to sort herself out she is being selfish! Thats when you do it for her docs have no choice but to act cus if anything severe was to ever happen, it would come back on them as youve made numerous pleas but fell on deaf ears. I do understand deeply how she is feeling, and it sounds as if the grief has made her very scared of loosing you both but is being selfish by acting like a child to keep you close x

I think it's highly unlikely that social services will take your child away, to the extent that I feel confident they won't. You sound like you are doing a good job, and you are the primary carer of the child. Your depressed MiL simply living in the same house as you is not a good reason to take the child away.

I'd second others' advice and say drag this woman to the GP and force them to start treating her.

I think it's highly unlikely that social services will take your child away, to the extent that I feel confident they won't. You sound like you are doing a good job, and you are the primary carer of the child. Your depressed MiL simply living in the same house as you is not a good reason to take the child away.

I'd second others' advice and say drag this woman to the GP and force them to start treating her.

There's been a surprising turn of events. My dhtook me out for a meal last night and my mom phoned dh mom. They've decided next year their going away together so that's really cheered me up.My mom gave her telling off about not getting sorted and she's made the decision to go to the docs on Tuesday to get sorted.

Saranga and Boogles: normally me and dh do take her however she's confided in me that she doesn't want dh to know the extent of her health. Go phoned yesterday and advised no more patches and to go back on other pain relief, full circle but I'm hoping their not going to keep blaming certain conditions as doc has said some of sounds to do with circulation.

Thanks people for your support.

Glad you're circumstances have taken a turn for the better Gemini! Hopefully the new meds will help, and you can start to focus in your impending new arrival! :-)

Glad things have improved for you :)