Grooming in birth

[alita7]

Ok I'm still 25 weeks away but it occurred to me today how hard it is going to get to shave my legs and to sort out my lady bits :P

What's normal regarding this at birth?

I had bikini waxes so that will not be an option, dp will help me trim that area I'm sure but it won't be pristine...

And my legs get awful rashes when I shave them too often, so it's unlikely I will have well shaved legs even if I can still reach!!

Does anyone actually care?

If you can't see what you're doing any more, can't you just do it by feel?

I like to get my (head) hair done just before my EDD and do my nails and stuff because I know I wont have time for ages after.

My leg hair seems to stop growing during pregnancy but I have always been able to shave in the shower, even right at the end.

I was amazed at my DN going for a wax in preparation for birth. Not in a judgmental way but just because I had never heard of it. I am 15 years older than her and I was having my 5th when she was having her 1st. None of her friends batted an eyelid so I am guessing it is a normal thing now days?

I don't know. Years ago we were forced to be shaved and have enemas and now we don't have to go through all that. I wouldn't chose to do it.

But everyone is different.

I don't go along with the 'you won't care' stuff. You should feel as comfortable as possible during labour. Anything that helps you relax is fine by me.

That could be a Brazilian or it could be Whale music.

Think they're usually more focused on the baby popping out than a mother's arrangement of her pubic hair. I'm tempted to go on a feminist rant but ultimately if you want to and can be bothered to trim, then do it, if not, then no one will notice or care. Would you care if they did anyway?

No one will care.

DH was well trained at leg shaving anyway, I have very hairy legs and I'm far too mean and far too much of a wimp to pay some one to wax the bits I cannot see.

DH also does, his now teen DD1's legs. (To bathing costume edges). He's far more competent than me or DS2.

Which begs the question - How, why, when do women decide to pay someone to do these grooming tasks for them. Does it depend on what your DM did or does it happen because you live on your own and don't have DM, DSIS, DP or Dflatmate you can ask?

It just never crosses my mind to shell out £££

DD2 (I'm sure DD1 wouldn't ask her brother, even if she had one )

It's something I need to figure out, personally I always trim "down there" not for any aesthetic reason, but purely because I find that the long hairs get really itchy. I'm not worried what people will think during delivery, because to be honest, they will have seen it all before. It's about personal comfort, but I'm nervous to ask DH to do it in case it all goes wrong somehow!

perfectly normal adult woman's body hair=huge bush

Here we go again. Of course pubic hair is normal. When did I ever say it wasn´t. To me it´s huge and horribly uncomfortable. It might be the same for the OP, it might not. I have been doing full on pubic hair removal since I was a teenager. So any type of growth is not pleasant for me. Quite frankly thinking about what another woman chooses to do with her pubes is not something that takes up time in my day.

My point is that no one should be made to feel badly for doing something they want to do with their own bodies.

bun this is true. I don´t just think about the pubic hair thing, I wonder about the whole lot. It is such a no go zone right now for me since DH was horrified at the varicose veins I started to ponder it (because he thought something was wrong with me down there, not because he was grossed out bless him. I wonder if the romance will ever return!). I am rightly reminded on MN healthcare professionals have seen it all and really don´t look at things in the same light.

OP do what is comfortable for you and not to worry about what anyone else thinks. Will leave keyboard now, pregnancy hormones too high methinks. Good luck with your labour.

I think my biggest frustration atm is that pregnancy is making my Eczema worse. pre pregnancy it meant that hair removal creams on my legs often makes them horrendously itchy and that's when all the ezcema has been cleared up for weeks. If I shave more than once a week I end up with scabby itchy bits (not from cuts) and pregnancy seems to be stopping my super strong steroid cream from working as I last shaved 3 weeks ago and I still have scabby itchy bits so I'd have to shave around them which isn't great as more come up. I used to epilate but the hair grew at different rates so I'd never have smooth legs anyway -.-

Grrr!

I think my biggest frustration atm is that pregnancy is making my Eczema worse. pre pregnancy it meant that hair removal creams on my legs often makes them horrendously itchy and that's when all the ezcema has been cleared up for weeks. If I shave more than once a week I end up with scabby itchy bits (not from cuts) and pregnancy seems to be stopping my super strong steroid cream from working as I last shaved 3 weeks ago and I still have scabby itchy bits so I'd have to shave around them which isn't great as more come up. I used to epilate but the hair grew at different rates so I'd never have smooth legs anyway -.-

Grrr!

"My point is that no one should be made to feel badly for doing something they want to do with their own bodies."

My point is that people are being made to feel badly for not removing their pubic hair.

And I guarantee that pubic hair has only been uncomfortable or unhygienic or "gross" or any of the things that it is regularly called on Mumsnet in the past 20 years. Before that, it was just how women looked. And ironically, there was a successful campaign to stop the routine shaving of women in preparation for labour.......

I have previously shaved whilst in labour, made me feel more relaxed about people looking down there afterwards (always needed stitches). I'm struggling this time as bump is soooooooo much bigger. I've had a go with a mirror but can't for the life of me get my hands to work how they're supposed to when it's all back to front. I'm trying my hardest to be relaxed about it but it's still niggling away at the back of my mind. Ah well hopefully I won't ever have to see the people again.

Please don't do what I did. I Veeted my bits before the birth. I thought I had four weeks to go, I actually ended up being induced in hospital less than a week later.

I joked that the stinging and the regrowth pains were worse than the labour. Still not sure I was joking

I got fed up of not being able to shave, didn't trust OH (although fair play he did a cracking job on my legs), so I just kind of wiggled around on the bed like a giant dying manatee, slathering it on, immediately regretting it but keeping it on otherwise it had all been for nothing. So I looked immaculate during labour, had my toenails painted thanks OH and everything, but my bits stung like hell.

No-one cares... or if they did, they didn't mention it... and you're best being comfortable :)

And I guarantee that pubic hair has only been uncomfortable or unhygienic or "gross" or any of the things that it is regularly called on Mumsnet in the past 20 years.

I don't know if it was a London thing but trimming/shaving/waxing was not unusual at all when I was a teenager 20 years ago sadly.

Saying it's a new thing shouldn't really be relevant though: Old, new, whatever. What a woman does with her hair (head, legs or pubic) is and should always be seen as her business and her business alone. Never any shame in any approach. And medical professionals will not (and should not) bat an eyelid, they've seen 1000s of fanjos before.

I have always trimmed down quite a lot but never gone bare (like a grade 2 if you will) for the simple reason that I dislike tampons and have quite a lot of natural female discharge, and find it itchy/'stuck together' at certain times if I don't, plus I swim a lot and feel it looks neater.

"I don't know if it was a London thing but trimming/shaving/waxing was not unusual at all when I was a teenager"

It was unheard of when I was a teenager - 40 years ago.

I had a planned section and the midwife told me they would shave it for me. I asked if it would be ok to do it myself so justified the whole lot with Veet.

I had an episiotomy all I thought at that point was

1. Ouch it hurts
2. What if DD was stuck

And then post birth I can feel a scar there for ages. I am sure it was much more horrid than a bit of bush.

Bun ah but it said 20 years... and I've heard it quoted as 10, even 5 elsewhere on MN. As if it just recently, suddenly appeared after we feminist sensible women grew up, and affects the younger, silly women only.

FWIW it's not quite that cut and dried.

Bad pun.

BTW, as an older silly woman I mean those descriptions satirically!