DnC or wait for natural?

[dream310]

Unfortunately I got bad news last week of a mmc and am absolutely gutted. I have an appointment this Friday to talk options. Cramping has increased slightly this week but nothing too major. Very little to no spotting. All advice on what to do next greatly appreciated xx

I'm sorry dream MMC is a very cruel thing. You have three options, continue to wait, medical management or surgery. It's whichever is least-worst for you personally. If you wait you will MC eventually, but if your body has not recognised the pregnancy has ended it can take weeks and that is very tough emotionally. Come over to the miscarriage board in the body and soul section, there is a thread called "tips for coping" which has lots of experiences of all methods that might help you decide. The Miscarriage Association is also v good for factual information.

So sorry for your loss

I had a MMC last year, like you no bleeding etc. I personally opted for the ERPC as I just wanted it over with and waiting for something to start by itself, not knowing when, was a slow painful torture. The procedure was a day one, very easy, bleeding was light afterwards and my recovery was very quick. Hospital staff were lovely too.

So sorry for your loss. I had a mmc diagnosed at my scan at what would have been 12weeks 2days, baby measured 8weeks plus 4 days. I opted to have d&c the following day as I had no cramps or bleeding so could have been a few more weeks before anything happened naturally. I wanted it over & done with to start grieving process. It's horrible to go through. That was my 3rd miscarriage in a row. Sending you big hugs x

So sorry for your loss. I had an absorbed miscarriage in Dec. I felt that I wanted the D&C as it was quick and over within the day. I was booked in for the next morning.
However, I thought I had passed everything throughout the night (I had some quite big clumps pass and they looked like little sacks), so I had to wait for the early pregnancy clinic to open to scan me.
Whilst waiting, I sat in the ward. The girl opposite me was going through the same and all she was doing was crying. It was bloody awful to see. When she went down for her op, she kept apologising for crying and was shaking. And I thought, I don't want to be like that. I don't feel comfortable crying in front of people, and I wa getting a bit scared by this time too. My mum doesn't do very well where anaesthetic is involved, and I think she's passed the feeling onto me a bit.
So I went for my scan, and I still had the sac, etc there.
I then decided to let it all go natural. I think I kind of felt guilty that I was 'killing' my baby, even though I understood there was nothing there to 'kill'.
So I went through it naturally. It took about 2 weeks in total. I had to wear the night time sanitary towels 24/7 and also had a night time training sheet on my bed (the type you put on toddlers beds to stop them wetting the bed). Though I never actually seeped through to it. Sorry to be so graphic, but it felt quite uncomfortable, like I was bleeding mushy peas and constantly wetting myself.
I'm glad I did do it naturally, I feel like it helped me grieve and realise what had happened, and that is wasn't my fault.
But at the end of the day, it is your personal decision. Read up on the three different methods, and decide which one you would prefer to take. None of them will be easy options, but one should be more 'practical' for you.

Sorry for this question which might sound something really stupid to ask but I hope someone can answer me please. Someone above mentions what would have been 12weeks 2days, baby measured 8weeks plus 4 days - so, if the baby is there, even though its small, why do they call it a MMC?

Because the baby is dead Alice so baby will have died around 8+4 weeks however the mother's body hasn't realised so hasn't physically miscarried and is still producing all the pregnancy hormones.

Yeah sorry Alice I wasn't very clear. My babies heart had stopped at 8 weeks + 4 days but my body still thought I was pregnant therefore didn't miscarry naturally. I only found out when I went for my ultrasound scan. My other 2 occurred naturally

Sorry for your loss, mmc is just awful. Have you been offered a d&c? This is slightly different to an erpc which is what most places offer now - it works with suction whereas d&c is scraping and can have more risks associated. So just something to be clear on before you go ahead.

I had mmc at 10 weeks, was barely bleeding naturally and as it would've been twins so there was an awful lot more still to come. Spoke to lots of people and opted for erpc, very glad I did, could not stand the thought of the waiting and then it all happening when I'm looking after dd, plus medical management didn't appeal either, I just wanted to be under a general and it all sorted. Was very quick and bled lightly for a couple of weeks with no pain. Just found out I'm pregnant again 2 months later so there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Wishing you all the best whatever you choose x