Londoners- when do you start wearing baby on board badge

[j200]

Hi
I have a one hour 15 min commute on the central line (one end to the other) and often don't get a seat/am squished for at least half my journey. Just wondered when everyone started wearing their badges? Still v early days for me but already feeling v tired- do you think 8 weeks is too soon? ( will remove before work )

Usmama, if I'd been anywhere near him I'd have told him to give you the seat! What a tosser.

I agree there's a case for an 'Gissa seat' badge but it's a tricky one. Not everyone would feel comfortable declaring to the world that they have a less obvious disability or infirmity.

A more general "I need a seat" badge is a great idea.

BTW, when I wasn't wearing one (but feeling absolutely awful) at about 11 weeks, I was asked by someone to give up a seat to his father. It wasn't a priority seat or anything (it was actually on an airport bus and I'd just been standing for ages to get through security and hauling my case around). His father needed the seat more than I did, unquestionably, but I felt the need for it then too (and had made sure I was first in the queue so I could get one). Fortunately, someone else jumped up before I could haul my exhausted self up. This is the problem with asking for a seat (unless you do it it to a group) - the person you ask might have their own reason for needing a seat that they do not want to discuss on crowded public transport. I'd only just reached the end of a 3 week bleed (the exhaustion was partly anaemia) and was not ready to discuss the pregnancy I still thought I was going to lose with a stranger on a bus. The badge is a much better system - if you feel inclined you can spot the badge and offer your seat.

I don't understand why people get upset by the badges, I think they are a wonderful idea, though they could be useful in other major commuter towns too, and think there could be an argument for a badge for seriously ill people, but the danger is people abusing them, or people getting tired of seeing them and not responding.

When I lived in London I always offered my seat to someone wearing one, even if it's only us ladies who look out of each other it's a start!

I now live in Wales but occasionally have to commute to our London office, so had a badge sent there, but I've never needed it yet. Really feel for anyone commuting with bad morning sickness, must be really tough!

"I agree there's a case for an 'Gissa seat' badge but it's a tricky one. Not everyone would feel comfortable declaring to the world that they have a less obvious disability or infirmity."

Just the same as not every pregnant woman would feel comfortable declaring to the world that she is pregnant. The badges arent obligatory right? At least if they exist people have the option of using them if they want.

Just asked DH and he hasn't noticed them either. (Mind you, he is self absorbed). I think the 'Gissa badge' is the way to go. When I was pregnant (3 times) I would never have had the need for the badge, but maybe some people do. But so do other people with other needs. Therefore a one-badge-fits-all would be a really nice campaign.

"I don't understand why people get upset by the badges, I think they are a wonderful idea, though they could be useful in other major commuter towns too, and think there could be an argument for a badge for seriously ill people, but the danger is people abusing them, or people getting tired of seeing them and not responding."

Surely this 'danger' exists with the pregnancy ones too?

I'm sorry, but it is quite funny, if you've never heard of such a thing before!

There are spoof ones shown on mousmous's post 17:43:49, so other people must find it slightly amusing, too!

Having said that, it is a good idea, if it has the desired effect.

at some of those spoof badge! "Plain lazy"

I do think you should only wear them when you need to rather than as an announcement of your status as a 'special' person. I'm 17 weeks and I'm feeling fine so wouldn't wear one. Ironically it was in the first 12 weeks that I needed it, but was too embarrassed to wear it without a bump!
In the strike last week it was really hard though. I've had an in-pregnancy operation, and the pressure on the scar as I was properly squashed was really quite painful - however in that scenario I suspect the badge wouldn't have worked anyway.

That's true, time. When I was feeling awful I wore the badge to support me in case anyone was being an arse, but when I was feeling fine I didn't.

I don't automatically agree with them because pregnancy in itself isn't an illness, but there are plenty of people who are ill or have hidden disabilities.
If there were badges for everyone who needed one then fair enough.
Of course if you are pregnant and ill then you should have one.
Perhaps if they were issued by a gp or other hc professional it would be fairer.

Anytime you feel uncomfortable put it on, do it on the train rather than wear it getting on. Be prepared to ask for a seat, I was shy and the best help came from men who offered to ask someone to move for me, I always thanked them profusely and they normally told me about their wife and children!

Top tip when feet and ankles hurt is flight socks. I put mine on an hour before the commute and it really soothed the ankles and feet.

Yes, I do ask because most people don't need the seat and are just being selfish. Unfortunately that forces those of us who do need to sit into uncomfortable conversations but that is part of being a grown up. If anyone ever said they needed the seat I'd apologise and leave them too it. It's a compromise but the whole conversation would be unnecessary if everyone could be relied on to do the decent thing in the first place.

"Yes, I do ask because most people don't need the seat and are just being selfish. Unfortunately that forces those of us who do need to sit into uncomfortable conversations but that is part of being a grown up. If anyone ever said they needed the seat I'd apologise and leave them too it. It's a compromise but the whole conversation would be unnecessary if everyone could be relied on to do the decent thing in the first place."

Thats my whole point! The badge makes no difference because you still have to ask and have those awkward conversations.

What do you mean Dorothea . Most people don't need the seat and are being selfish? For a start most people actually pay for a seat and would quite like to sit on it if they can. And how do you know that a non pregnant person, actually doesn't need it more than a pregnant person?

I guess many of the replies come from people outside London!

I commute every day and they are very common, a normal thing to see.

OP start wearing it as soon as you feel the need. The whole point of the badges is to let people know before the pregnancy is obvious, so no point waiting until you look pregnant!

And yes people offer seats to those wearing them, and I expect try to avoid shoving them so much in queues, on the escalators etc and give a bit more room.

I started wearing mine at around 14/15 weeks but a couple women I worked with started wearing theirs almost as soon as they got a positive test and just took it off as they got to work. It's completely up to the individual I did manage to get a seat most of the time but there were a few times I had to ask even in my last week at work with a very noticeable bump. The badge doesn't guarantee a seat unfortunately

Put it on now! I think lots of people are terrified of offending women by offering them a seat just in case they aren't pregnant.

When I was about 20 wks two men who had obviously had a very good lunch had a loud, protracted conversation about whether I was pregnant or had just had a big lunch! They eventually offered me a seat. I started wearing the badge after that.

I can't actually believe there's such a thing! I'd feel more of a prick with a badge on than asking for a seat!

I felt too self conscious to wear one at first, but after a busy tube journey where I nearly fainted and had to ask someone for a seat, I realised that actually I needed to be wearing one (prob around 15 weeks). It's better for everyone if you're not taken ill on the train and cause delays! Most people offer if they see it, and it also gives me the confidence to ask if no-one looks up as even at 29 weeks my bump is small enough that you can see people doing that 'is she/isn't she' thing.

Also, like others say, I wear it more as a 'please don't barge me out the way' thing as well.

I wore mine after the first two times I'd fainted in public (both those were with DH thankfully). I never did faint on public transport but had some near misses. I thought it would be useful and informative if anyone had to scrape me up off the floor during my journey to work. And of course it helped me get a seat, thereby reducing that risk.

I guess I should be glad I live in London where the badges are common, rather than somewhere else where they apparently invite mockery. How nice and empathetic some people are.

Temperatures on the tube sometimes top 40c in summer, and are often above 30c. IME overground transport (while also sometimes hellish!) is nowhere near as bad.

I don't mind the badges, but live in London and didn't know they existed. I very rarely catch the tube- more overground or bus.

Exactly, giraffes. It's nice, isn't it?

It does help a lot with 'don't barge me, please', I notice the badges a lot on the Tube, especially in central London, and I definitely notice the badge more than I notice a bump, especially in longer coats. It all helps.

But I forgot, most women chose to be pregnant and as it was their choice, they shouldn't expect any special consideration or just, you know, basic politeness...

I do agree that seeing how well the BoB badges have worked in London, it would be a very good idea to look at a way of extending them to all people who might need or want to ask for the priority seat.

I never did. If they couldn't see me when I had a 9month humungous bump sticking out half a mile in front of me they sure as heck weren't going to notice a tiny little badge.