Early second trimester anxiety

[Pushonregardless]

I know that there's very little anyone can say to help me feel better about this, but I thought I'd give it a go.

I'm 31 years old and 14+3 with my first baby. It took over 18 months to conceive this one with one early loss and laparascopic treatment for ovarian cysts and moderate endometriosis. So to say 'much wanted' would be an understatement.

I'm over the moon but very anxious. I had an early 9 week scan and a 12 week with no issues. The run up to these were intense and I was shaking and crying before both because I was so worried something would be wrong.

The 20 week scan feels like an eternity away, but I have a midwife appointment next week at 16 weeks. I can't stop thinking that something might have gone wrong in the weeks between.

I have suffered with daily vomiting and other strong symptoms from week 6 until 14. This has now subsided which is a huge relief but also brings fresh worry.

I know we all worry, especially the ladies who have struggled. But, is there anything that will put my mind at rest? I'm not keen on buying a doppler for the usual reasons.

I am 14+3 and had 3 Mcs so i understand your anxiety.
Speak to your midwife at that appointment about your anxiety.
They should be able to refer you to speak to someone and learn how to deal with the anxiety if you think that would help.

Could you get another scan at the EPU? I know some are very strict, but if your midwife is understanding then it may be a possibility.

I break up the time on the calendar by having something planned each week, I'm meeting an old friend this week and have a consultant appointment next week. Stay busy.

What about purchasing one of those machines which you can listen to the baby's heartbeat with - people sell them cheaply second hand. Someone may correct me but I think you can use them from 18 weeks?

Its agonising, Keep posting. Our dates match so we can update each other throughout

I hope all goes well

Thanks Red

I'm not keen on a doppler as I think it will add to my anxiety if I can't find the heartbeat.

I think I will be ok when I get to the appointments as I always feel better when I speak to someone/hear the heartbeat. And then I feel like a bit of a time waster for telling them about my anxiety. My GP knows I've suffered with it in the past, so perhaps I will mention it to her next time.

I find that I'm fine for a good two weeks after a scan and then I start to worry again!

I can understand that.

Yes I'm the same I thought my anxiety would stop after the 12 week scan but this week I'm wondering how I will go another 6 weeks not seeing the baby.

If only we had a window
Definitely talk to them about your anxiety, IME it only helps and you are not wasting their time, it's perfectly understandable. Pregnancy is bloody scary!

I hated this stretch of time with all 3 of my pregnancies (and I've had a mc so fairly anxious when of) - symptoms have subsided but you have no real bump and no baby movements to reassure you. It's no-man's land, really.

Nothing much to do except wait for your 16 week appt and just try to relax. 2 good scans suggest the risk of something going wrong now is very small. So try to comfort yourself with statistics, and try to indulge yourself.

It's the hardest bit of pregnancy mentally I find. It will get better, promise!

Hi pushon, you sound pretty similar to me... I'm now 23 weeks pregnant and have struggled with anxiety about my pregnancy after a previous mmc. I did get a Doppler and that helps me but I can understand why you're not keen. Other things that have helped are listening to Maggie Howell's pregnancy relaxation CD, going for a daily walk and attempting to be accepting of the anxiety because it really is very understandable when you've had a hard time previously.

If you're 14 weeks now then the statistic are well weighted in your favour (I kept on telling myself this). It also won't be long until you can feel the baby moving and that really helps.

I know how you feel, I had a terrible time early on with anxiety, it only really started to ease off after the 20 week scan and once I started to feel movement around 22 weeks. I also had an early loss and that hit me quite hard, then I found out very early with this pregnancy (around 9 dpo) that I was pregnant again so I worked myself up into a right state and ended up having early scans (7 wks & 10 wks).

I tried to tell myself that the stats are all on my side but that fear and doubt was always there, however irrational. I do feel a lot more relaxed now (32 wks) but there's always something to worry about, if you let yourself.

I did buy a doppler and I picked up the heart beat quite early, around 11 wks, although it sometimes took a while to find it. By 14 weeks it was easy to find and that helped me a lot. I don't use it now I can feel movements.

Angelina - really That's tempting - what brand was the Doppler?

I've found the sonoline Doppler really good. It's worked every time since 14 weeks.

I felt exactly the same...
My angel sounds Doppler was only about £20 on amazon and got me through a lot of worried evenings/mornings/every day : ) I know it doesn't work for everyone but with practice and patience I found it every time I tried. Also, we booked a £40 gender scan at week 18, which gave me something to look forward to. And I started feeling movement around 16 weeks which also helped to ease anxiety a bit. Best of luck.

Sorry for delayed reply, it's an Angel Sounds doppler.