Hi squid
What an awful few weeks you must have had. I'm so sorry this happened and keeping my fx for good news for you.
I'm in a similar situation. Had a private scan at 6+1 after all my symptoms disappeared and I feared the worst. This is an ICSI pregnancy and I have some complicating factors so very worried about everything.
The scan reassured me somewhat as the Sonographer measured the embryo at 5+5 and we saw a slow HB, which we were told is normal that early and would speed up.
Then yesterday I had an early scan (6+6) at my fertility clinic and the Sonographer there measured me at 6+1. Saw the HB again but it's still slow. So basically in 5 days my baby only grew 3 and I'm terrified.
I know things develop at different stages for different people and I've. also read that IVF/ICSI babies can start slower but it doesn't stop the worry.
Luckily yesterday they agreed to book me in for a reassurance scan in 2 weeks rather than making me wait until 12 due to my anxiety, but did stress we shouldn't be 'unduly' concerned. Whatever that means. If they hadn't agreed to another scan though I would have paid to have another private scan because I would have gone crazy waiting 5 weeks or more. 2 weeks feels long enough as it is.
Would you consider having a private scan? (I'm in the midlands and paid £80 for a diagnostic scan.) I guess it can be a double edged sword as there are no guarantees that things will remain okay after, but for me 5 weeks is too long and, if it's good news at 9 weeks, great. But if the worst happens, I'd rather know sooner so I can deal with it.
Good luck