Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Flip

Original poster

My own worst enemy

12 replies

Lula2515 · 07/04/2014 12:30

I'm 10 weeks pregnant today. Basically freaking out every step of the way. Had a mmc in December and I just knew something was wrong. This time I don't feel the negativity I did before but still can't stop myself having a mild breakdown on the inside! We had an early scan at 7.5 weeks where the saw a heartbeat (which was never seen last time) and I've booked a private scan for the 16th so that I can tell family over Easter. But in the meantime, I have exams to be concentrating for and all I can think about is this...and I can't stop reading scary blogs!
Was just wondering if anyone else feels like this even though things are looking good...or if anyone has any tips on calming the breakdown beast! X

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Hope0411 · 07/04/2014 12:51

Hi Lula,

I am very similar to yourself, i am 10 weeks pregnant tomorrow and had previous miscarriage both from ivf treatment (no heartbeat on early scan). I also find myself worried alot, i've had a few complications to far re a small bleed and 2 bigger bleeds with clotting etc, each time it lasts about an hour or so and i am convicned that I am losing the baby but each time I get a scan after and baby is fine! Back in clinic tomorrow for further investigaions but really trying hard to stay calm and keep remembering that baby is looking ok!! I have also spent lots of time trolling google for pregnancy and what I should be feeling etc. I think finding here was fab, I'm trying to stay positive and air any concerns here where other people can be supportive and share how they feel.
I think its perfectly normal to feel anxious, especially after previous miscarriage and also the hormones are in full force!!
Go easy on yourself and take time to relax :) also feel free to air all your concerns, sometimes once you put them out there they dont seem quite as big and scary and when they are in your head and its amazing how many others feel the same way!
xxx

Original poster

Lula2515 · 07/04/2014 13:12

Thanks so much for your reply Hope, it's lovely to hear from someone in a very similar situation. Good luck with your appointment tomorrow, I will be thinking of you and sending you positive thoughts. I am consciously trying to calm down for the next 9days til my scan!

Xxxxxx

OP posts:

ChicaMomma · 07/04/2014 13:23

Hi Lula,

If it's any consolation, i was the same (until 13 weeks, am 30 now).
OH said that it was a regular occurrence to see the iPad ''glow'' at 3am in the morning as i googled MMCs, nuchal fold measurements, you name it. I was a crazy person. i hated the first 12 weeks, the uncertainty and secrecy was horrible.

Since then however I'm the most chilled out preggo person ever. The pre-natal yoga, being able to talk to friends and family about it, and HypnoBirth tracks have kept me on an even keel. You'll be fine, it's all normal!!

congrats!!

JBrd · 07/04/2014 13:23

Hi Lula and congratulations on your pregnancy! I am currently pg after having 3 miscarriages last year, and I feel for you! It is so hard to relax and enjoy, when you know what can happen... Take one day at a time, and try to keep really busy, if you can.

I told a few very good friends very early, which also helped me a lot - they had been there for me when I had my mcs, so knew my worries, and this really helped. I couldn't face telling family.

I can highly recommend joining this thread here on MN - lots of help, support and hand-holding, everyone is in the same position as you are! They have kept me sane since I had my BFP, and I am now 13+4.

Good luck!

Original poster

Lula2515 · 07/04/2014 13:43

Thanks ChicaMomma, my OH has tried to ban my frenzied iPad searches!!! It's difficult to stop!

JBrd thanks for the link to that thread...may have to build myself up to joining it, the lovely positivity and my hormones made me cry a fair bit!

Congratulations to both of you and thanks for your advice xxx

OP posts:

ChicaMomma · 07/04/2014 14:01

It's very difficult to stop and worst of all, Google is so NOT your friend!! Everything you google seems to come back with the worst case scenario, and when you google MMCs you get the misplaced idea that they are very common indeed- as you are directed to forums discussing them where a huge % of participants have suffered them, for obvious reasons, they wouldn't be on the forum otherwise. But in reality they are rare, and a small % of total miscarriages (regular Mcs total being 20-25 of pregnancies, MMCs being a small % of that 20%, i worked it out and i think it ended up being 3% of all pregnancies).

I had that crazy worry though and i hadnt even had an MMC prior to this pregnancy- so i cannot imagine the scale of crazy once you've suffered one, i'd be intolerable i'd say. So go easy on yourself!!

You'll get there though- you're very close now to 'normality' phase. I've loved being pregnant since 13 weeks, once you get over the craziness it becomes v enjoyable. I had a few days of semi worry before the 'Big' 20 week scan but nothing major really xx

Original poster

Lula2515 · 07/04/2014 22:21

Argh you're so right! Thank you!!!! Xxxxxx

OP posts:

goestoshowyouthough · 08/04/2014 05:57

I have been in exactly the same position as you, even down to the timings of pregnancy after a mmc and the scans you are having! Drove myself mad, and was a nervous wreck. I was definitely worse at 10-13 weeks, as that's the time I associated with bad news. I definitely relaxed after that, and now have an adorable 7m old dd who was worth it all. Hang tight, and don't beat yourself up about being a little crazy. I think it's perfectly understandable! Good luck with your next scan, the chances are hugely in your favour now you've seen that heartbeat x

Original poster

Lula2515 · 08/04/2014 13:22

Thank you! That's really reassuring! Just need to get to the 16th and I think I'll calm down a bit. Wishing I booked it for sooner now, but wanted it as close to the 12 week mark as possible as I see that as a bit safer.
Congratulations on your dd xxxx

OP posts:

ChicaMomma · 08/04/2014 13:44

it'll fly in- it's only a matter of days away now.
Try and find some hypnobirth tracks to listen to in the meantime.
I think the one i am using have some free 'sample' downloads- www.gentlebirth.com
They've been so fantastic for keeping me sane, they somehow get into your sub-conscience and chill you out! the boxset is expensive but there are definitely some free downloads to sample on that site too.
let us know how your'e getting on in the next few weeks!

TeaAndANatter · 08/04/2014 13:50

No building up needed, Lula, come over and join us on the PG after MC posifrickintivity thread. We are all very well used to freak outs, terror, rage and questions, overshares and stories - the more the merrier. Hand holding a plenty on tap.

See you there x

Original poster

Lula2515 · 08/04/2014 14:15

Doing it now...thank you xx (warning I am in tears though)

OP posts:

Flip