mw wants to see where baby sleeps...

[peeapod]

what sort of thing are they looking at here..

I'v been told the midwife is going to want to see where baby is going to sleep, cue tonnes of tidying in our bedroom, will they also want to see babies actual nursery, even though its just a massive pile of boxes and currently the junk room, or just where shes actually going to sleep for the first 6 months?

what sort of thing are they looking for with this?

I agree in general people tend to overheat their houses and overdress their babies. But some houses are just really uninhabitable, and I think that is all this check is trying to identify. Like I said they will know that within 2 seconds of walking in your door and the rest is just polite chit chat.

I've had 5 children and not once has a mw asked to see where the baby will sleep.

I'm due in couple of weeks I had a hv about 6 weeks ago and she just chatted in my living room.

She even said were not coming around to judge your house etc.

Very odd

Mine had to tick a box to say she'd seen where baby was sleeping, even though she didn't actually go upstairs (just asked what we were doing).

I think they just want to make sure you have baby in your room, aren't planning to bury them under piles of cuddly toys and give advice if you have bumpers etc.

Mw asked me to see where baby would sleep! This was the day after we got Home from hospital. House had only had dh for a few days so was a serious state and I wasn't expecting it so was quite embarrassed to show her our room. She was apologetic and said they have to. She just had a quick glance and said it was fine. With my first there was no request but Moses basket was in sitting room so mw had seen and she'd been in my room to give me sweep and seen the cot!

I didn't take it personally or presume I'm deprived or anything. I wouldn't worry!

I think the airing cupboard sounds like a grand place for a baby, irrespective of the vodka bottles etc (personally, that's where I'd keep vodka bottles if I drank! ). Nice and snug, somewhat soundproof, right size etc.

I get jolly grumpy at the questions asked by the HV and MW. I appreciate they're doing their job, but it put my back up to be asked to provide my mother's phone number 'in case I miss a developmental check'. I'm 36 with two children already FFS, who are well developing, clean and happy. No social work concerns ever, mortgage, good career (not that that counts diddly squit about parenting ability obv), stable loving husband (ditto - supports my parenting personally, but lots of strong amazing stable single mothers) - why the hell would they need my mother (who lives in another country) to hunt me down? I barely speak to my mother. If I disappeared, she wouldn't have a fricking clue where I was! Grump. Grump. Grump. Made me feel like she thought I was about 12 and utterly incompetent.

Re the 'nursery' - we don't have one, we have a corner of my room which will do just fine.

Midwife checked on early visit once home from hospital with dc2, apparently routine here. I did ask her what she'd do if it wasn't in line with guidelines and she said... 'well you seem very sensible, and you've not killed the first one, so nothing really but I've got to put it on the form that I've checked....'

Right then!

Per

Phone on it's own mission.

Personally I think it's the way things are heading these days, call it bum ccovering. With all the cases where things have been missed or this should of happened that should of happened, areas are slowly changing their policies and procedures so that they can wash their hands of any blame if something bad was to happen.
I am more than happy for anyone to check my house no matter the state, would just hope it was a day where dp hadn't left his manky pants lying around, no-one should have to see them. I would rather go through the embarrassment of a messy room if it meant they were doing their job and did manage to pick up on a potential child protection issue or a mum who's struggling but can't seek help.

I couldn't actually get a home visit prenatally until my second baby despite planning a home birth both times. Unless you count a midwife thrusting a box of stuff over the threshold at 36 weeks the first time and dashing off.

I remember with dc2 the midwife asked where my baby would be sleeping. I said we were going to cosleep and I had bought a futon mattress thingy for the two of us. "How lovely" she said. "That's made my day". Which is of course the correct response unless one is planning to pop them on the window sill or in the under bed drawer

Btw dh was still sorting out our tip of a bedroom upstairs while I was in second stage labour downstairs. The mw was yelling for him because she was nearly going to have to assist her with the delivery because the other midwife hadn't turned up! I think it's fine to say "we haven't sorted it out yet" and she won't be interested in the nursery (unless your midwife is Lawrence L-B and had a keen interest in design!) unless the baby is actually sleeping in it.

Standard 36 week visit round here. I was told they are checking for risk i.e smoking, co-sleeping (got a big lecture on that) etc. my midwife actually referred to it as the crack den check!!

Anyway it was all fine and very quick.

giveme5 I don't live in an area of deprivation and that is all that is offered here too. What other care is there (other than immunisation)?

I'm a midwife. I have to do this. Don't worry you don't need to tidy up your room. I'm pregnant and won't be going mad cleaning if the midwife wants to look.

I've had 3 and never been asked this so is it really a standard thing everywhere?
I think if not they should have to say
'This isn't standard everywhere but is in your area.' Absolutely fine if it's now standard national practice but doing it in what is considered a somewhat deprived area and not being honest enough to tell the woman it's because the health authority consider that to be the case is wrong IMO.
Also, why would a woman living in a more deprived area be more likely to put a cot in front of a radiator? We well well educated, affluent and late 30s living in a very expensive area and I knew nothing whatsoever about how to look after a baby. I'm sure the 30yr old in the less expensive area with her mum around the corner and the large extended family was probably less in need of being checked over!

MW and HV both asked me where the baby was sleeping but neither asked to look.

Even if they do ask to look, you don't have to show them if you don't want to!

HV asked me at about 5 days if I had a moses basket, then laughed and said "bet he won't sleep in it though!". She gave me a leaflet with some bed sharing info in it.

My health visitor also asked the same question too n wants know where baby will go