Feeling overwhelmed by Inlaws, overall down in the dumps.

[Londonlady76]

Hi I'm new to this forum I'm 34 weeks pregnant and feeling very overwhelmed.

Just to say its a long winded rant lol
We have every thing bought for baby including pram and car seat etc. My mother inlaw has bought a lot of stuff for us. How ever grateful I am it's not what I would of picked out. I had money put away for all things baby and I haven't had chance to buy any thing. It kind of got my back up but just put it down to excitement and let it lie.

Now I've found out she's bought a pram for herself wtf. I plan to breastfeed exclusively up to a year so baby will be close by in my year off work. Do you think it's weird she's bought a pram for her self or I'm a being a total bitch.

My mother on the other hand doesn't have a lot of money and I wouldn't expect her to spend all sorts, she has bought baby girl lots of books things that she can keep and read when ever. To me these small tokens mean so much more that over the top baby gifts and clothes. My husband who I love, will send pictures to me of stuff his mother has bought and if I don't reply he rings saying did u get picture.
Yesterday my mother brought over to of the books to add to baby's room and when I showed them he said oh yeah then looked away. When my mother went home I burst out in to tears and said it's not always about money and things my mother had bought us mean so much more. My mother buys things that will benefit baby. His mother buys showy things like expensive clothes.

Sorry just had to let off steam you will all think I'm and ungrateful bitch moaning about things she has bought but honestly a pram for her self seems over the top :(

Greentshirt "don't forget, he is partially my baby" .... What!!! Disgraceful.

CP tart, I know, nuts!! It was straight on the back of me saying he would be sleeping in our bedroom for ages so wouldn't be staying at her house. It was all laughed off and was actually funny but gave her beloved first born son a nice little insight into how her mind was working so she did me a favour really!!

This is actually a selfish way for your MIL to behave. She can wrap it all up in helping you and your DH but she is enjoying shopping for these things and not thinking if they are what you actually want or need.

My MIL did the same before our DS was born. She admitted once that she was doing it because she liked buying baby things. She turned up with so much stuff when our DS was just a week old it totally overwhelmed us in our small house. Most of it was cheap tat from Primark, too.

She didn't offer a single bit of practical help, just overloaded us with "things". She also never asked DS's size so we had tons of newborn clothes that were far too small. It was a total waste of money!

Fortunately I was EBF so there was never a question of me leaving DS with her. It's a very good excuse!

My Mil is a bit like this and I worry she's going to be very overbearing once baby is born. She bought lots of things but mostly because they were cheap and there.. Not because anyone particularly needed or wanted them iyswim? She offered me things I really didn't want or need and I've had to be so diplomatic turning them down so as not to offend. Some things I turned down for genuine reasons (space/practicality) she then went and bought anyway, and then was really excited to tell me she'd bought them but she's keeping them at her house at least.

She also goes on in one breath about making him a room at ours so he can stay over and how she has a spare old pushchair etc. but in the next she's laughing that "we think she's going to babysit all the time but she's not!" I don't understand this as neither of us have ever mentioned her looking after him and weren't planning on it either!

My gran decided to buy my wee boy a "warm winter coat" after my husband dropped him at her house one day and had forgotten his. He had everything else (hat, gloves etc) but had picked up his lighter coat accidentally. My wee boy wore it once. On that day. Complete waste of money but successful in making my husband feel a bit crap. It made me angry! Had she bought him a pram to keep at her house, my head may have exploded. You have my sympathy!

My in laws have brought a travel system for themselves because it was a good buy second hand....

We probably are going to leave LO with them when we go away sometimes doing our hobby, but I am slightly concerned now how much they're expecting to see LO! However, it also means we can go for visits taking baby in a sling or similar on the train and then have a pushchair waiting at the other end without taking the whole faff on the train!