First time pregnancy at 37

[Miriama]

Hello! I'm just found out I'm pregnant, and really not sure what happens next. Just did a pregnancy test, we are delighted but a little overwhelmed! Do I tell work now, or should I wait a few weeks? Should I get in touch with my GP now too, can anyone tell me what happens next? I need some help please?

I would wait before telling people, but that's only because I struggled to get pregnant, had recurrent miscarriages and learned the hard way. Friends of mine have announced the pregnancy straight after conception and have had no issues, but it always worries me a little. I think waiting is best, but it's not always easy.

I would contact your GP. It's good to get decent medical advice early doors imo.

Other than that, I would say congratulations. I had my first successful pregnancy at 36 and now have a beautiful 13 year old daughter. She keeps me young...I can tell you all about all sorts of indie bands and have a strange taste in tv, dictated by a teenager.

I am a little jealous of you. Congrats. I hope you stay healthy and happy. x

Congratulations! I'm also pregnant at 37, although this is DC2. Not sure what the procedure is at your doctors surgery, but at mine you have to see the GP who will make a referral for you to the midwife. The midwife will then make a booking in appointment with you, which will last about an hour and they will take a detailed history an refer you for a scan and screening tests between 10 and 13 ish weeks.

Last time I told work very early because I had bleeding early on and needed a couple of days off (high pressured job and would have been called constantly if I'd lied and said I was "just" off sick). This time work don't know and I'm 11 weeks now, but I plan on telling them once I've had the dating scan and screening tests, not least because I'm already huge!

Good luck!

Thanks both, some good advice! I need to see my GP and sort out a midwife appointment. This is my first pregnancy, and has really happened very quickly, we weren't expecting to be successful so quickly, so I need my brain to catch up with my body! I've been on a couple of nights out drinking recently - do you think that would be a problem? All a bit new to me!

A couple of nights out drinking isn't an issue - the embryo will be feeding from its yolk sac at this point.

I personally wouldn't tell anyone I wouldn't have wanted to talk to about it if things had gone wrong (I've had a previous mc and stuck to the same rule then, and it worked fine). For me, this means a small number of close friends who have supported me through tests and fertility treatment. They've actually been more supportive than my family. Other people will get told if I get past 12 weeks this time.

I'm also pregnant at now just 38 (birthday last week), although we had been trying since I was 34!

Hi, I'm another pregnant at 37 (well 38 now) first time mum :)

I would say to call your surgery - it sees that in some areas you need to see your GP, in others you go straight to a midwife appointment at about the 12 week mark.

I ended up telling work at about 14 weeks because I had quite a few appontments and needed time off for those, but I would probably have kept it quiet a bit longer otherwise.

Don't worry about the drinking either!

Thanks for your advice, I will call into the surgery this week and get the ball rolling so to speak. I'm in Woolwich so I'm guessing that the earlier I speak to my GP the better for getting appointments arranged.

I took the clearblue test, which confirms 3 weeks plus pregnant, so I guess another couple of months before I'd tell anyone including work.

I think the toughest thing will be not drinking in social situations, this is going to be very suspicious to most people who know me, I guess I will be "on antibiotics" for a few weeks, as an excuse for not drinking!

You can always order soft drinks and say it has a vodka in it...worked a treat for me.

I posted a thread about what excuses to come up with when going out with friends, and the general advice was to drink tonic water or pretend you'd had a big night the night before and you were sticking to soft drinks that night.

My friends are slightly more suspicious than some so I came clean to them when we went out for a meal but I'm hoping I got away with it at a works do on Friday!

I didn't see my GP until I was 8 weeks. I had a couple of episodes of bleeding, and until they had been checked out I found it difficult to believe this one might work out. My first midwife appointment is at 11 weeks, and my scan appointment has just come through for 12 and a half weeks.

Everyone sees through the antibiotic excuse, btw. At this time of year a dry January/detox would be a good excuse.

I'm also in SE London.

Hi miriama, another first timer here at 36. I'm 10 weeks yesterday and not telling everyone has been painful but we're waiting for our 12-week scan, like a lot of people. With the not drinking thing, you'd be surprised a) how many people don't notice if u pretend to be drinking but are actually on soft drinks but also b) people tend to be polite enough to realise not to ask many questions! Most women at least realise that a lot of people don't tell for a little while. I haven't told work yet but am planning to faster first scan. Think it's just easier for them and me to plan with it all out in the open. Good luck

Congratulations! .

I had DS1 at 37 - no problems at all.

Contact your GP surgery and ask how they deal with newly pregnant women. In our surgery, you fill in a form and the midwife appoints you directly to her clinic. From there things like blood tests and scans are organised.

I told my parents when I was only 5 weeks with my first pregnancy and then miscarried, so had to 'un-tell' which was hard. So, I never told anybody about any of my pregnancies until I was over 12 weeks.
I also opted to have diagnostic antenatal tests for various reasons beyond just my age.

Don't worry about what you've drunk before you knew you were expecting. Wrt excuses, I used to say I was driving or make sure that I had a drink I could claim had alcohol in it when it didn't.

Take your folic acid and Vitamin D (or a pregnancy multivitamin), don't smoke and enjoy the excitement of knowing you are pregnant!

Hi miriama, and congratulations from another 37 year old first timer! It is very exciting and very scary isn't it?!

Great advice from all the other ladies on here. I would just add that you should start taking folic acid if you are not already, either on its own or as part of a pregnancy vitamin like pregnacare. It helps prevent problems like spina bifida.

Also don't expect too much from your first doctor appointment. It depends on the area but mine didn't even do a pregnancy test, just gave me the midwife clinic number and told me to stop drinking and eating soft cheeses etc. Things get more exciting when you start seeing the midwife.

I just turned into a social hermit for a bit and made excuses not to go out drinking. Also try to only tell those that you would be comfortable telling if you had a miscarriage. Sadly at our age it is more common, I've been there and the most painful thing by far was having to untell people.

Last piece of advice: check out the ante-natal threads on here and join the one for your due date. Good luck with your pregnancy!

Congratulations!

Antibiotics is as good as announcement to anyone who has kids, or is close to people who do. People think it 'works' because most people aren't so crashingly rude as to question you. If you genuinely want to keep it quiet, go with:

• driving;
• had a heavy night;
• dry January;
• disguise (drink mixers alone, pretend there is vodka. Swap glasses with partner).
• or, for those very close, you are thinking of ttc and want to get in tip top condition.

Wow, thanks to everyone for responses! I am dealing with a very excited husband here who is dying to tell everyone we know, and I am a little more cautious. I bought some folic acid with the pregnancy test, as I had an inkling (sore boobs, dog tired etc.) and started taking it today. I'm nervous and excited, the plan is to wait till the 12 week mark then spill the beans. My mum lives in the far north of Scotland and is coming down in March so thought that would be an ideal time to let her know.

Socially I have arranged a fair few things in Feb for my birthday (soon to be 38 and pregnant! Eek!) including a trip to Glasgow which is usually a boozy do, will have to do a mix of "drank too much the night before" and disguised mixers only.

Aside from all the thought roaming in my head, the overwhelming one is happiness!

Appreciate the support, especially as I really don't want to let anyone in RL know until we are sure there are no probs! M

Hi all, I'm a 10 weeks pregnant first timer at 36 so know how you feel. Found out just before Christmas (after a few boozy parties!) so made an appointment with my GP straight away. As you say, not much happened there, I got my Bounty pack of goodies and filled in a form for the hospital. She did reassure me about the drinking which was good :)
Christmas was weird, had to tell close family as would have been too hard to keep up a cover story for the whole time but planning on telling everyone else after my scan which feels like it's taking forever to come!! Literally can't wait!
Good luck with it all.

One other piece if advice is that pregnancy hormones can be a bitch! Don't panic if you start crying for no reason or you start going through the "what have we done!" thought process. Most pregnant women have been there at some stage and it's perfectly normal. I cried at A Knights Tale FFS

So far I've been oak re mood swings, although husband would probably say otherwise! Just been really exhausted, I hope that this stops soon, bit fed up of feeling like this!

Okay not oak! OMG!

If you have a big birthday weekend, confiding in a close friend to be your 'wing man' on buying and disguising drinks can be really helpful

Hate to say it, but the exhaustion didn't lift for me until the second trimester (twice) and until about 18 weeks (this time). Take advantage of the fact that with baby no. 1 you can really rest up

Funnily enough one of my friends is also pregnant, but much further along, so we will be non drinking buddies, guess I'm in charge of the kitty!

Sorry to say, but at 20 weeks I'm still shattered! It's different for everyone though, and I'm enjoying the fact that I can completely veg out legitimately!